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My married ex's birthday is coming up, how do I wish her a Happy Birthday?

Tagged as: Breaking up, Cheating, The ex-factor<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (22 September 2011) 9 Answers - (Newest, 23 September 2011)
A male United Kingdom age 36-40, *elvin1357 writes:

Dear Cupid,

I had an affair with a married woman. It had been almost a year since we broke up. I didn't answer her call and reply her mail.

I'm still single and I couldn't find a girlfriend may be cuz of my busy work. To be honest, sometime I miss her but I don't want her back and we shouldn't be together also.

Now, her birthday is coming up this month. What should I do?

Should I call her or just sms her on her BD? OR should I just send BD e-card via mail?

Please help me.

Thanks

KK

View related questions: affair, broke up, married woman

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A female reader, Tisha-1 United States +, writes (23 September 2011):

Tisha-1 agony auntWow, we've gone from a birthday card to the ex, who was a married woman and you've been broken up for a year to this follow up? It seems you have a larger issue to deal with?

I would suggest you tell your family and friends that you are seeking to date and to ask them to start helping you find suitable candidates. If you are finding yourself to be 'too choosy' maybe you have something to work on. Talk to a professional if you are having trouble coping.

There are lots of articles on here if you look through the archives. I found a few that might be a start for you:

http://www.dearcupid.org/question/how-to-meet-the-man-or-woman-of.html for example. This fellow http://www.dearcupid.org/people/daniel_the_love_doctor has written a series of articles on dating advice.

You could also search the archives here http://www.dearcupid.org/search

Keep in mind that DearCupid is not a dating site. Good luck in your search.

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A male reader, kelvin1357 United Kingdom +, writes (23 September 2011):

kelvin1357 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Thanks all for your kind advice!

Sometime I felt very lonely especially on weekend. I really want someone with me. But still couldn't find a right person. Perhaps I'm a bit choosy.

Here's what I usually think about myself it is because I'm getting bold although I'm just in mid 20.

I'm getting paid very good salary but I still have to support my family and just don't want to spend much money in relationship.

I may not have much experience with women as I dated three girls and seriously getting involve to that married woman only.

In terms of good point, I'm good looking :)

I do have great ambition in my life. I care about peoples and good personal relationship with all kind of peoples.

Is it true girls really care about all those my weakness? How can I find a right person for me as my soul mate?

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A female reader, Tisha-1 United States +, writes (23 September 2011):

Tisha-1 agony auntClose down that account and forget about it. If she contacts you, just tell her it was sent automatically. It's possible it went to an account she doesn't use much either, especially if it was her secret account she kept hidden from her husband. Probably not really worth worrying about.

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (23 September 2011):

So_Very_Confused agony auntgood advice all around already.

maybe get out and meet some new folks...

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A reader, anonymous, writes (23 September 2011):

Your not screwed, just make sure you delete the auto option for her!

Your only thinking about her because your single - so get out socialising and forget her and what happened re the card.

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A male reader, kelvin1357 United Kingdom +, writes (23 September 2011):

kelvin1357 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Ohh..I'm screwed then.

I just received a mail from e-card service.

BD e-card was sent to her yesterday which I set as auto from my account. I didn't notice as I seldom use that account.

What should I do now?

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A female reader, Star xxx United Kingdom +, writes (23 September 2011):

Star xxx agony auntShe is married, what you had is finished so I think maybe you should let sleeping dogs lie. I dont see the point in stirring up the past now and wont do anyone any good.

Take care xx

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A female reader, Ciar Canada + , writes (23 September 2011):

Ciar agony auntNone of the above. You say you don't want her back, but sending her a birthday message a year after you've broken up says otherwise.

Leave her alone and move on.

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A female reader, butterfliesarefree United Kingdom +, writes (23 September 2011):

Don't do anything you broke up remember?

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