A
female
age
30-35,
*harli-x
writes:Hi I really need some advice. Me and my boyfriend were going out for 8 months, but he was a compulsive liar. We have sat down and he has admitted the lying but says he cant stop it. He has told me every lie hes told. But he admitted to texting a girl he liked when we first go together. I know he hasnt cheated cus he is with me all the time, but I cant help but think he has texted her stuff he shouldnt have. I broke up with him last night, but today I have felt awful, like I have made the wrong choise, but I couldnt bear the lies! Am I too paranoid? What do I do? Charlixxx
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broke up, liar, text Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Bubblegum-Pink +, writes (10 September 2008):
 You most definitely made the right choice. It's not worth your time any more to worry about whether or not you made the right choice - one of the good things about not dating him any more is surely that you don't have to stress yourself out over anything to do with him!
Well done for plucking up the courage to confront him and deal with the matter appropriately.
A
female
reader, hlskitten +, writes (10 September 2008):
 What you're experiencing is instincts. Regardless of what yarn he spins you about fighting for you sweetheart.C xxxxx
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A
female
reader, Charli-x +, writes (10 September 2008):
Charli-x is verified as being by the original poster of the questionSorry I meant to put fight for me not with me!!!!
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A
female
reader, Charli-x +, writes (10 September 2008):
Charli-x is verified as being by the original poster of the questionBut theres a problem he rang me today saying he is going to fight with me and get all the help he needs just aslong as he knows Ill be in his life. He does seem sincere. I really do love him and want him back, but theres a little bit of doubt which is why I cant. I cant eat, sleep and all I do is cry. I shouldnt be like this I should be happy that Im not with him!
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A
female
reader, hlskitten +, writes (10 September 2008):
Its easy to say from this side of the fence but yes!
I think you have had a lucky escape. But its a tough pill to swallow for you because you are really into the guy!
If he is a compulsive liar then get out, or get used to not knowing where you stand and always wondering what he is up to.
C xxxxx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 September 2008): Yes, yes , yes it was a good decision. Men like that only get worse and I was married to one. Even when caught out he would keep on and on lying to the extent that when you provided him with unrefutable evidence I was mad and crazy. I promise you it is like a disease and it it gets worse. My ex husband lies all the time about everything even to his children and for what? I know when you are young you can lie to look big, make yourself look impressive, pretend you have more money, the list goes on but you do not want this kind of chap for your future. Once it starts these people find it impossible to stop. You know its wrong and you have made the right decision. If he wants to stop ask him to get help and make sure he actually goes to any councelling, doctors appointments as often men will promise but don't attend. If he doesn't like being checked up on then he is lying. Let a bit of time go by and find a nice trustworthy man. Trust is everything in a relationship.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (10 September 2008):
 As it has been repeated over and over again on this site, trust is crucial to any relationship. You simply can't have any in a relationship with a compulsive liar. You did the right thing to break it off and if and when you get the chance, encourage him to get some couseling. I hope he listens.
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (10 September 2008):
It was the right decision. If he's a compulsive liar then he needs to get help, it's like OCD... you can't help him if he won't help himself.
If he realises he's lost you because of it then he might go and get that help.
He needs this so don't let him drag you down with him.
Good Luck!! xx
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