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male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I am a virgin and I am interested in sex and relationships but I am afraid because I am in experienced and i have a small penis. The internet forums I have been on I have seen women talk about not being able to stay with otherwise great guys who were not gifted and or lacked staying power. However, I have read that oral sex is the number one way to please a woman and that a penis is not needed for a great sexual experience. If this is true why would a woman leave a man who is willing to try is hardest to compensate for what he lacks? And should I even bother trying to compensate for what I lack if I am just going to be heartbroken because of it?P.S. From what I have seen at the gym and public restrooms where I live. I am better of staying a virgin to save myself the embarrassment of exposing myself to someone.
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male
reader, older virgin  +, writes (25 January 2013):
Reality is a bitch!Sometimes we have no choice but to face it while other times we can simply acknowledge it and make alternate choices or choose a different path to follow.Being "small" is an embarrassment no doubt. You can choose to do as others say but you must be mentally prepared to handle the rejection. You seem to be aware that this is more a probability than a rarity. Rejection is difficult on anyone but when it's because of something you can't change or you can't fix then it's a whole different ballgame. It becomes a disability. You feel broken. Truth or not, in your mind at least you ARE broken.I'm sure the women say "size doesn't matter" are trying to be as kind as possible but we both know it is a lie. Facing reality is not always great but it beats living in a delusional fantasy world. I'm also sure that there are women who "don't mind" but that's like saying it matters but there are other things I like more. However, in order to find "those women" you again have to be mentally tough to handle what lies between you and them. Chances are you aren't going to find them right away which means you'll have to "deal" with this problem over and over. It's bad enough having to do it on your own but at least you can keep your secret to yourself. When other people find out and start commenting on it, it will wear on you and bring you down. By the time you do find someone, you will be so disillusioned that you won't care or you won't be able to notice.Obviously the choices in life and the path you take are up to you. You get the evidence, weigh the facts, pros and cons and carve out a future for yourself. Whatever that future happens to be or what you end up settling for.In my case, I am 40 and still a virgin. Never been on a date, asked nor been asked, never kissed, touched, or obviously, had sex. Never even had a female friend. When I was younger, there was no internet for people to ask for "help". I did it on my own based on what I saw and heard. Having a small penis would make me joke to most people. It was in movies, tv shows, magazines the message was everywhere and still is. I faced the fact early on that my body was broken and there was no magic pill, surgery, extending device, potion or elixr that would fix it. Seriously, don't buy any of that crap. They are con artists out to steal your money.For some guys it's about not pleasing her and for others it's about not getting that far to begin with. I assume you are of the first category. I am of the second. Most guys are said to have a "porno" playing in their mind 24/7. Not me. It's always the date that ends in horror. The pants come down, my eyes closed, turning red, instead of enjoying the moment, I dread it. Fear and anxiety comes over me and for a moment, silence. Then I hear the sound of laughter and I am trapped, unable to move, paralyzed. After what seems like an eternity, I find myself free. I grab what's mine and start running. I don't stop and I never have.No one has ever seen "it" and unless I end up in the hospital *knock on wood* no one ever will. At my age now, I have already passed the point of no return. There is no "chance" now anyway but there never was to begin with it just no longer matters. I have carved out my own life by myself. Can't have male friends either, too many questions. At least I enjoy peace and quiet and fill out my time with reading, watching tv, playing video games and riding my bike. I made my choice younger than you are now and you have more "experience" than I have. I decided to use others' experience rather than put myself through it to keep my sanity and at least some self esteem. All I can say is make your choice wisely. You know what you are capable of handling and what you aren't. Before you put yourself in that position ask yourself 1 question. "Is the end result worth it?" For me, the answer was, no!
A
male
reader, Silius Sodimus  +, writes (22 January 2013):
As I said to a previous guy, the size might matter to some sex fiend who only want's sex and is superficial, but for someone who want's a relationship size rarely matters and there are plenty of women who are interested in a relationship where size is second to the relationship itself. If your still worried just remember most of the nerve endings are located at the entrance point of a woman so unless you have a micro penis i.e 1 inch or less erect it means nothing, especially if you can make her orgasm from oral stimulation. There are plenty of sleazebags and ugly guys making a killing from p****y who have no idea how to use their equipment. 55-75% of women achieve orgasm through oral stimulation far more than through intercourse. If a woman cares about you, all that superficial crap goes away. The trick is finding that kind of woman. Keep trying and keep on the look out for those kind of women. Also consider this, if size was everything then only large guys would be in relationships or getting sex which is not true.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (7 January 2013):
 I'm just going to tell you my story.
I left a man who had NO SELF ESTEEM who had a decent size penis and THE BEST ORAL SKILLS EVER found on this earth for a small guy with a small penis and no ability to perform oral sex but who thinks he's god's gift....
why?
because a man who has no self-esteem and no confidence is not attractive and a man who is confident and has a good sense of himself is very attractive.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (7 January 2013):
 There are literally millions of men on the planet with a penis your size. They are enjoying sex and intimacy with women or men, depending on their sexual orientation. They are not allowing negative thoughts to derail their lives.
You have a healthy, normal penis. Enjoy it!
Stay off the forums that discuss penis size. Don't look at other men in restrooms and the gym. All that is doing is feeding your insecurity.
Instead, focus on the things you do well. Build your confidence.
There is a woman out there who will think you are great and wonderful, and perfect, normal penis and all. She won't think that though, if you think you aren't.
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A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (6 January 2013):
I want to point out that guys with average and especially below average penis' are a lot less likely to be walking around naked in the gym shower.
So judging yourself by that is really just hurting your self esteem.
Your size doesn't put your penis in the pinky finger equivalent category so relax.
Worrying about your penis and being lonely doesn't seem better that going out with women and getting laid.
Also, almost all women have enough heart to know that if a man is unable to please them in bed (due to penis size or lack of skill or selfishness or whatever) that she's not going to break up with him by saying "sorry but your penis is too small to date."
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 January 2013): I can relate to how you feel. I'm a woman, but have been made to feel inferior for having small boobs (the equivalent to a guy having a small penis.) I'm 24, and I see 14-year-old girls with bigger boobs than me. It sucks. And yes, guys have rejected me for it. I'm not going to lie to you, there will be women who will reject you for it. There will also be women who will be thinking "thank God" when they see your penis. Know why? Because for some women, sex with a guy with a big penis HURTS. It all depends on the woman. Some women are loose "down there", and some are so tight that even sex with you would hurt them.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (6 January 2013): This is the OP for information sake my size when erect is 4.7 inches length and girth. and a couple of weeks back i saw a guy in the toilets at the mall who was larger than that and he was flaccid, it made me feel very small
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (6 January 2013):
 There is nothing to be "lacking" with a smaller penis. I promise you that men care WAY more about penis size than women do. The vast majority of women can't orgasm from penetration. Oral sex is to most women what penetration is to men.I'm one of those 25% of women who can orgasm from intercourse and it only happened with one of the smallest guys I've been with. Has nothing whatsoever to do with size.Also to mention most guys seem to think the average is way bigger than it actually is. The average is 5-6 inches when hard and 2-3 when soft with an average circumference of 3.5" (when hard).
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A
female
reader, NORA B  +, writes (6 January 2013):
Real love for a man is loving the total man, the size of a man penis should not come into it. The sexual act is part of a relationship not the total relationship.Don't judge all women the same as the woman you stated .I know you are hurt at the moment but time will heal. Hopefully in the future you will meet a woman who is in love with the total You. Best Luck. Nora B.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 January 2013): Obviously I don't know how big you are, but to be honest it doesn't matter man. I lost my virginity at 16 and I'm not the biggest in the world I'm pushing 6.5-7. The lack of confidence is more of a turn of to the ladies than how small you may be. Who cares man, just find a girl who you like, develop a relationship and if you have sex with her don't worry what she'll say about size because unless she is a real bitch then she won't make fun of you and most likely she won't even care. Just be confident and find a girl. Give it a shot, I mean there is no point of not trying because your nervous of what a girl might think. If you ask 100 girls 99 of them would say size doesn't matter.
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