A
female
age
41-50,
*atea
writes:I have been seeing a guy alot older than me 4 about 2mths now, however all we do is just have sex.. he has made suggestions of going out but we haven't yet, the only thing that bothers me is he lives with his baby's mum and says he is there for convenience for his kids.I dont know if i trust him. he also gets very jealous about me being single although i have two kids... help what is it he wants from me?
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female
reader, linda5000  +, writes (29 January 2009):
I am in the same situation only I am older by 16 years. Talks about going out, but never did. But I understand that this can never be a relationship because of the age & his four kids from 2 different woman. The attraction alone is mind blowing he's perfect in everyway, (at least in my eyes) I feel life is too short, why not enjoy sex with him. But if it is a relatioshipthat you want than leave now to see if he really cares, If you leave him maybe then he would leave the "EX". If he does not leave her then you know he will NEVER.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (15 October 2007): Sounds like you're a sex toy to him. The old "I'm just with my kids' mama for their sake but the relationship is over" routine.
You know what this is just as well as I do. The only question is how long will you continue this?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 October 2007): All he wants from you is SEX. He sounds like a looser. If he still lives with the mother of his children I am sure he is not just staying on the couch. Open your eyes and go with what you brain is telling you. Get out.
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A
male
reader, thor +, writes (30 March 2007):
 stacey slater, max branning, tanya branning. do these names ring a bell. they are characters in eastenders. They are going through a similar situation. in the end someone is going to get hurt. get out while you can and find someone single. you are just his young bit on the side. you deserve better.
thor
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A
female
reader, TELLULAH +, writes (29 March 2007):
 Hi,
Does this guy tell you he wants to be with you, if so what is stoping him. Ok so he wants to be there for his kids, that doesn't mean he has to live there does it?.
More importantly, what do you want from him. If all you do is have sex, there's not much to the relationship. I think if you dont love this guy what is the point of continueing this affair. Do you know if the wife or partner knows about you, because i bet she doesn't. And will be devastated to find out.
If you are both in love, he should be honest and tell her he is leaving. He can still support the kids.
But if your not in love and are just having sex, well to be honest, you both deserve each other.
You did ask
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A
male
reader, home_land  +, writes (28 March 2007):
 hello
the best thing get the kids together and take care of them all 3of you him his wife and you take care of your kids .
he loves both of you .
good luck
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A
male
reader, agony_uncle_r +, writes (28 March 2007):
read through what youve said.
he lives with his babies mother, do you really think its all for the baby?
all you do is have sex when together
he keeps telling you you'll go out, but something always comes up right?
hes using you for fun and nothing more, get rid of him
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (28 March 2007):
 If all you do is have sex then obviously that's all he's interested in, when it comes to you that is. If you want more than that then you'd best start looking elsewhere.
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A
female
reader, creamepie +, writes (28 March 2007):
Just Sex !!! Wake up your just his _ uck buddy
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 March 2007): You don't trust this man. Not a good thing. It sounds like he wants the perks of a committed relationship (his gf) and the fun of 'sex' (you) whenever he wants it. What a shame, that you are allowing this. You need to hold yourself to a higher standard in what you'll expect in your life. You are with a man who still lives with the mum of his kids, you don't go places with him and all he ever wants is sex. Those are huge red flags. Ia gree with the other AUnts...he's hiding something and you are believeing every word he says. Discern a man by his actions, dear..talk is cheap. Sounds to me you have gotten yourself smack dab in the middle of an affair with a man who is getting exactly what he wants from you, without having to put in too much effort. Hun, when a man is still unavailable to you and has another woman and family in the background (no matter the state of their relationship), that means he is not going to be leaving her soon to come to you, on a permanent basis. Stop giving him what he wants and insist he take care of getting out of his other relationship before coming back to you.
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A
female
reader, Reebe +, writes (28 March 2007):
 Hi
I hate to say it but I wouldn't trust this guy either. Something isn't quite right about him stil living with his ex, if she even is his ex.
I would stop sleeping with this guy just say you don't feel like it one night and that you fancy going into town, see what his reaction is, because after 2 months I would of thought, if he had nothing to hide, he would be glad for the 2 of you to be going out and doing things together?
He sounds to me like he just wants his cake and eat it. I'm afraid your going to have to push this guy and see where it takes you.
I hope I'm wrong and he is genuine but there's only one way to find out!
Good Luck!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 March 2007): I think he's using you and If you don't trust him its time to end the relationship
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