A
male
age
41-50,
*r T
writes:Hi, I am a 28 year old male (soon to be 29) from the UK. I know that it sounds shocking, but I am still a sexual virgin and have never had any sexual experience or girlfriends.Up until now, that is. Well, we haven't had sex yet...I have met this beautiful 20 year old woman. Soon she'll be 21. Things are going well between us; I am just taking things smoothly. I do not want to pressure her into anything. I am just looking for a casual relationship; if things progress to something more serious, then so be it. She may or may not be the girl of my life; only time will tell. I am not interested in finding somebody to marry; not just yet anyway. I am not in the 'settling down with a family' stage of life yet. I don't care what 'society' says about the stage of life I should be at my age. Lots of people are not married at my age. I still like to go out to bars and clubs! The thing that bothers me is other people's reaction to having a younger girlfriend. I am called a 'perv', 'pervert' on almost a daily basis. Are these people just jealous? Is there any rational basis for people calling me a 'perv' or 'pervert'? I personally do not see what the problem is- my 20 year old girlfriend is an adult. Yes, she may be severel years younger than me, but she is still an adult. I am still in my 20's. I am not all that old am I?
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male
reader, StudentOfLife  +, writes (30 May 2008):
 At a point, people were saying that the world was flat. They were saying that everything that could be invented has been invented. They said that a man could never fly.They were wrong when saying that, what makes you think they're right when saying the age cap between you two is too big?
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 May 2008): It's just a total double-standard.
Guys just call you immature because they're a little jealous that you have the guts to do what they'd secretly like to do.
Women can dish it out, but they absolutely can't take it themselves. When a particular girl is 20yo, she will say that her dating a 28yo guy is fine. When that same girl is 28, then she'll say that her dating a 36yo guy is still fine. But when that girl is 28yo and her 28yo male friend is dating a 20yo, she'll call him hopelessly immature.
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A
female
reader, duskyrowe +, writes (24 May 2008):
 I just noticed your name is Mr T...... ' I pity the fool who says I am a pervert'!!!!!!! LOL.
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A
female
reader, duskyrowe +, writes (24 May 2008):
Hun these eejits are jealous of you having a lovely young lady as your girlfriend. Stick the metaphoric two fingers up at them and enjoy your time with your girl. Good luck when you finally pip your cherry. xx
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 May 2008): your both adults and what people say shouldnt matter... you are old enough to know who you wan to date no matter their age..
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A
female
reader, aphexinfinite +, writes (24 May 2008):
 age is just a number, and those people have no right to call you a perv or any other name for that. just because their is an age gap means nothing. look back through history people married all ages and had several wifes may i add..so dont let them get to you you are doing nothing wrong at all hope this helps aphex
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 May 2008): Not at all. This is a definite minor age gap considering other people's experiences. You are right, you are both adults, and as long as you are both happy with the relationship, and you're certainly not breaking any laws in the UK, why not ignore these stupid people and get on with it?There will always be difficulties in an age gap relationship, even with just a few years between you. You've experienced more of the world than she has, and you may see her as somewhat naive. You may remember things from before she was even born! But they only become issues if you let them. If you can get over trivialities then you can enjoy your relationship as you should be able to!You're both in the prime of your lives, and if both of you are comfortable with the relationship, ignore these haters. Avoid them. You don't mention if they are people you know? They are not worth having around if they will not let you live your own life.
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A
female
reader, hlskitten +, writes (24 May 2008):
 No you're not all that old, and she is not all that young either! Ignore them. Its not illegal, its not even like she's a teen!
Its none of their business and i would ignore them. Idiots.
C xxxxx
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A
female
reader, Rolly +, writes (24 May 2008):
I am 18 and my boyfriend is 27. Age makes no difference if the two of you get along, and love each other very much, as you two seem to.Good luck! :)
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