A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I want to divorce my husband and move abroad with my son. I know my husband and family will object strongly. Is there any way it is possible? I cant face the possiblity of leaving my son behind. My son is very close to his dad, and i am not doing this without putting considerable thought into it, i know it will have a major effect on my son. I would appreciate any advice or help, thank you, L
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female
reader, yuridesu  +, writes (5 March 2010):
 think about your son, can he really have a life without a father ?
he'll also feel the pain and guilt of how you two split up.
if you really want to divorce your husband for serious issues then, please do.
just remember to empathize with your son
and if you can, try to work it out with your husband. dont jump to conclusions with divorce already. live separately first and see how he reacts. if he really cares for you and wants you back by putting as much effort to change then you're problem can be solved.
if matters are too complicated try going to a counsellor.
A
male
reader, AvgGuy1  +, writes (4 March 2010):
WHY do you want to torture your son in such a manner??? If he's really close to his father, then yanking them apart will be DEVASTATING to him and he MAY end up HATING/RESENTING you for it... to the point that you do irreparable damage.
What is his relationship with you? Similar to that of his father?
Divorces are very hard, emotionally, on kids. I would seriously recommend that you just get a divorce... and stick around where you two can share custody of your son.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 March 2010): If the husband is close to the son it is highly unlikely taht you'll gain custody , especially seeing as you are thinking of running away OVERSEAS! I mean get real!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 March 2010):
My son is currently having severe panic attacks at the moment. His mother has moved overseas and he is having a very hard adjusting to things. What are your reasons for moving? They might make it easier to help.
If your son is very close to both parents, than any decisions you make that changes his ability to see you both regularly are going to affect him greatly, and in a very negative way. We have sent him to see a professional to talk to, and his advice to us was, "your son will always remember his mother's choice to put him in this ugly situation. She has taken away his right to a cohesive family, and she has uprooted him for her own wants, and ignored his, he will never forget that."
We have always been very amicable with each other, and it is very hard to help her communicate with him, when at our end, we have to talk him into getting on the phone with her. How we're supposed to get him on a plane i don't know...
I don't know if your situation has similarities, but unless the move is imperative (maybe some more info would help you get better, more specific advice) I would think about the damage to your son, his father, your husband and your family you are prepared to inflict to get what you want. Remember too, if you are feeling emotional at the moment, you aren't in the best frame of mind to make well thought out decisions. I hope you are ok, and that this insight is helpful.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (4 March 2010):
We need more information. Why do you want a divorce and why do you want to move abroad? Because if you go for it, you need to have very good reasons, of a judge might say he's better off with his family and friends here. We need more information.
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A
female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (4 March 2010):
 Well why do you want to move abroad? Why do the benefits of moving abroad outweigh the issues you will encounter when trying to take your son away from his family?
You dont give enough information here I'm afraid - you will only get people responding and telling you that you are being selfish and that you should not take your son away from his dad. So you need to give us your reasons for moving abroad, why you want to do it, why you think it is a good idea, why it will be better for you and your son....etc
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