A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:ok me and my bf have been together for six months and we have liked each other for five years i cleaned his room today and found a letter in his dresser from his ex gf it was in the open so he must know its there what should i do?
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male
reader, justfriends +, writes (20 November 2010):
 well even if he has kept it, its not like he asked for it unless you know he wanted this letter. I wouldn't give him shit about it cause its just not something to get pissed about. I would just let him know that when you were cleaning his room you found a sweet letter, unless its some nudes or something. if its her saying she wants to get back together with him don't be mad at him he is not the one who wanted to get back together if she said she wants to.
You probably don't want your bf to get angry and since even know your his gf its not really fair to call him out if he wasn't the one who started the situation. I have girls numbers and text them just to keep in touch its not flirting its just to see how things are going. I don't want to sound sexist but it seems like girls get to protective as well as guys but guy usually don't freak over a letter its more over physical stuff.
A
female
reader, largentsgirl89 +, writes (20 November 2010):
 I would mention it to him. Be understanding and not "WHAT'S THIS." Or he more than likely won't tell you the truth. Depending on what the letter said, I don't think you should freak out too much, unless the letter was just recently written and he is in contact with her.
It's probably just a memory thing that he likes to hold on to, he might not have even known that it was there. If you were cleaning his room and it's not your room, then he probably hasn't cleaned it in a while.
I wouldn't freak, I would mention it to him or it will eat at you about what it means.
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (20 November 2010):
 First of all, why were you cleaning his room? I'm assuming that since you called it "his" room, then it isn't yours?
And, how can a letter be out in the open yet inside a drawer? Did you come across it putting his socks away, see a letter and get curious?
Having gone out for 6 months, I would agree and say nothing about it. He may have forgotten it was there. He may regard it as simply a memory, like an old photograph or a diary.
I wouldn't make a big deal out of it unless you were engaged or married, UNLESS you also find evidence that the love letter was new and that he's still in contact with her. Then it should concern you.
Naked pictures are different and much creepier. Those should be disposed of upon a breakup.
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (20 November 2010):
 Well you could always ask about it, but unless it's naked pictures I'd let it go. I'd imagine it's difficult finding the letter because it's hard to be faced with the idea that not only did he date before you, but that he actually liked his girlfriend. It's a normal feeling to feel jealous of previous lovers/partners. People keep all sorts of nostalgic memorabilia and this really isn't any different from pictures of family members and old friends. He may have liked her in the past, but he's not with her, he's with you.
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A
female
reader, candus +, writes (20 November 2010):
 it sounds like he wanted you to see it. I would ask him why he has a it. there is a reason its in there ask him why you deserve to know
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (20 November 2010): Leave it alone. Don't read it unless he wants you to. Don't mention it.
People keep stuff from their lives, it may or may not have meaning that you might think it has.
For instance, I have pictures of my ex-wife, a couple of albums in fact, on the bookshelf in my living room. My wife doesn't mind them, my kids occasionally look at them and ask questions. I almost never look at them, I don't need to because I lived the pictures, they aren't painful for me and aren't painful for my wife either. I offered to get rid of them if they bothered her when we got together, but they show me at a time in my life when I was younger and she knows there is nothing else from that time of my life to keep for the kids as they get older to know what their dad was like when he was young...as there were no other pictures.
On the other hand, when our marriage was finally over, I burned all our letters because they had stuff in them that nobody ever needs to know and even I don't ever want to read.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 November 2010): Hey there:] Well if you guys have been together that long then I wouldn't really worry about it. It could probably be from a long time ago when you guys never knew eachother. Just put it back where it belongs and focus on the relationship both of you share now:]
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A
female
reader, Fredjuste +, writes (20 November 2010):
I know your pain, Mine have a naked picture of his ex, and he cheated on me with her.
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