A
female
age
41-50,
*harmy
writes:Hello i am a 37 year old woman and i have been in a relationship with this 50 year old man for two years. We've gad some rocky times but overall its been nice, we love each other and we had plans to marry, but last night i was on the phone with him and he got a call at almost one in the morning. I asked him who it was and he said he didn't no, he said the call said united states so i said answer it. He came back to the line and he said they didnt say anything. Well i said give me the number and i sent a text. Long story short it was a woman who claims she met him on a dating site. He denied it and i broke up with him because i believe hes lying. How could she have gotten his number then he said he thought it was me sending one of my females friends to play a trick on him, something i have never done. He sent this woman sexual text messages but he said he did it because he thought it was a friend of mine i sent to play a trick. He's mad im hurt, what do i do. He said i rather believe a wonan over him but its just that his lies sound so crazy!
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female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (26 June 2015):
 I have to say IF you were a couple of teens his story "could" "maybe" be true, but for someone in their 30's and 50's? Seriously? If I were you I would be SO offended that he thinks you are dumb enough to fall for that ridiculous story.
The woman had NO reason to lie.
BUT let's say for a minute he was right, that he thought you would "play" such a childish "trick" on him, how would talking SEXUAL to your "friend" help him? or the relationship? How would that make him look like LESS of an asshat? IT wouldn't !! Whether he talks sexually to a friend of your or a stranger he met on a dating site.. it's just NOT funny.
So his excuse is a tonne of hose manure.
He is MAD at you... BECAUSE he got caught!
I BET you, if you called that woman and asked what dating site, you might still see his profile up. And it might not be the ONLY profile he has out there.
He is MAD at you... because by getting mad at you, you get defensive and STOP digging.
Next he will tell you he did it because he thought YOU were cheating on him...
THIS is all your fault (IN HIS head) because he is the kind of guy who can't own up to bad behavior.. it's ALWAYS every body else's fault.. NOT his.
He is MAD at you... because he KNOWS he can make you FEEL bad for thinking he is a sleazy cheater and he thinks if he just seem upset enough, you will think maybe he is right, maybe he didn't do what that woman said....
BUT I will reiterate : SHE has NO reason to lie to you. HE does.
And I agree with Honeygirl, IF you two are intimate - go get a STD/STI panel done.
I doubt this is the first time he has sought "entertainment" from outside the relationship.
A
female
reader, Honeygirl  +, writes (26 June 2015):
 I would say that his story is all lies... I have no doubt he is on dating sites and playing the field.
Be kind to yourself and find someone who will be honest and trustworthy.
Oh, and sorry to bring this up, but as you probably have an intimate relationship with your bf - I would suggest that you go and have yourself tested for STI's.
I think that if you had to really dig deep you would find out that there is a lot more to this than what he has told you.
Sorry!
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (26 June 2015):
 You say to yourself: "Hmmmm, I guess this guy is a "player" after all...... And, I don't want to be in a "relationship" with - never mind MARRIED TO - a player..... So, I guess I'll dump his a$$ and seek out a REAL "boyfriend.""
That brief conversation, with yourself, should do the trick.
Good luck....
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 June 2015): If I thought my partner was playing a trick on me (like that) I would have asked them about it straight away not wait until it makes a handy excuse. He is not telling you the truth and your gut instinct is correct. He is also angry that you are upset? That is the total give-away that he is a liar. You have nothing more to prove.
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A
female
reader, Ciar  + ♥, writes (26 June 2015):
 I don't buy his story either. His indignation is more likely just a smoke screen. He's trying to divert your attention away from what he's done. Funny he never mentioned this 'joke' you played on him until now.
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