A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Ok, i've been with a girl for half a year now, I love her so much. I was on msn buzzin and talking to some girl. When the topic of having sex with her came up I said maybe thinking nothing of it. My girlfriend found out and yeah, I didn't mean nothing of it and was only saying it out of boredem but she don't think of it that way. I went to see her yet she's left me. She said she'll meet me in two days however when I told her I love her she said "I don't love you".Help please.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (3 April 2008):
 What you see or hear is not what you get.
Don't be disheartened.
Everyone make mistakes.
She is angry with you and that was her response.
Give her a few days for her storm to calm down and you go
back to her and apologize .
You did not meant it and she will forgive you.
Don't give up and when she is around act abit remorseful until she forgives you.
Get some flowers for her when you apologize .
A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 April 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYes I wasn't the person to bring it up.
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A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (3 April 2008):
 I agree with Tisha-1, whatever the tense she speaks in :-).
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1  +, writes (3 April 2008):
 Sorry, the last sentence should have read, "you're going to have to discuss what happened, in the ACTIVE (not passive) tense FACE TO FACE (not online)."
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (3 April 2008):
Right, buzzing with some girl on msn. I kind of like the way you phrased the sentence "When the topic of having sex with her came up I said maybe thinking nothing of it."
The start of it is in the passive tense, which doesn't tell us who brought up the topic of having sex... so maybe you're off the hook there. Maybe she brought it up or you did, who knows? It was just a mistake, right? No one brought it up, it just happened...
Imagine the situation was reversed, your girlfriend was buzzin with some guy on msn, and didn't tell him to buzz off when the topic of having sex was mentioned. Would you be okay with that? Would you feel good about her saying 'maybe'? I rather doubt it.
You're going to have to face whatever consequences arise from your chatting on line with other girls. Sorry, but maybe this is a good learning experience for you. Empathy for your girl, figuring out that there are other ways to relieve boredom, just a few things to think about.
I hope things work out for you with her, but you've seriously damaged her trust in you, and if you really want her back, you're going to have to discuss what happened, in the passive tense online.
Good luck!
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