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Does my teacher like me or am I confusing these signs?...

Tagged as: Age differences, Forbidden love, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (15 January 2008) 22 Answers - (Newest, 18 March 2014)
A female Ireland age 22-25, *luvs_it? writes:

Dear Cupid

There is this teacher in my school. He is alot older than me but I have the feeling he's attracted to me he messes with other girls but I think he likes me. Here are a few things he has done:

1. If the desk infront of me is empty he sits on the table facing me and stares at me even when I'm working and when I look up he smiles at me and looks at me deep in the eye.

2.When he forgets his book he always smiles at me and asks for mine.

3.When I put up my hand he always answers me.

4.If I forget something he always lets me off nicley.

5.When I'm stuck he always leans in REAL close. Scarily close.

6.He always stars at my legs (i'm 5t 6) and when he passes me he always stares right into my eyes.

7.If Im out in the rain he offers me a life or lends me his umbrella

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A reader, anonymous, writes (18 March 2014):

Hello! Im a high school girl and im having the same issue. I see that you have posted this in 2008, but what happened after that???? I was kinda shocked after reading this because your first explanation is exactly my case. Was he a math teacher? And in which country did you go to high school? Are you from Asia?

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A reader, anonymous, writes (22 November 2010):

if thats what your teacher does mines ten times worse first he got an erection in class ( fair enough its hard to control) but then stood right behind me so when i turned round to look up at him his erection was pressing into my back or he'll put his hand over mine when im doing something and kept it there till i moved my hand away hes stopped now for one reason or another but still stares at me and gets jealous when he found out about the guy i like :\ you're teacher sounds like hes being friendly

1) its considered polite to look someone in the eye when you're talking to hme it also shows youre engaged in what tehy're saying

2) shows he trust you and thinks you're relaible

3) he knows you're clever

4) sounds like youre a favourite pupil of his (doesnt mean he likes you)

5) if youre pretty and have nice legs any hetrosexual male would stare at your legs its nature doesnt mean theyd act on them

6) probably nothing ive been offered lifts home by teachers if ive been feeling ill

sorry just read your next post thats without a doubt flirting enjoy it but dont pursue it

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A female reader, nightdreamer22 United States +, writes (15 January 2010):

nightdreamer22 agony auntit seems he does like you but i wouldn't go that far into it because something bad might happen but i think he does like you

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A female reader, dreamingwithabrokenheart United States +, writes (15 May 2008):

dreamingwithabrokenheart agony auntThe things you mentioned don't sound AT ALL like flirting...sorry to break it to you. It just sounds like he is being the kind, caring individual that you admire in him.

don't read too much into what he does. but if you think he really does start sending you signals remember that he is doing it because he CAN, probably not because he wants a relationship. he is in a position of authority over you and he can safely toy with your emotions all he wants without getting into trouble - it's one of the things that makes liking teachers so frustrating - they may be sending all the right signals but the smart ones know that they can really never have you!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (1 May 2008):

You are mixing things up !

teachers are like that especially if they are male!

male are just atractited to young women!

so wacht it

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (24 April 2008):

well i've got the same problem with you he is my dance teacher..he is 33 and i'm 21..he always waching at me..he smiles me..in one word he is flirting me!Come on he wants you...we must not forget as the others says...he is human also!If you are 17 forget it..and just go on with someone else...If you are 18...then enjoy it..maybe he will make a big move..you never no..But never ask him..what he is doing..besides we know...A woman has feelings,,if he do all this stuff..then hello...he likes you..and wondering ...why i like my student?does she like me too?if i make a step..how she will act?and many other things..

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A male reader, 2old4this United States +, writes (11 February 2008):

2old4this agony auntSeriously, i'm not sure I believe this anymore. I think this is an adult pulling our legs to see how far he/she gets with it. Sorry, it's just too much right out the movies too believe anymore. I can't imagine anyone being this stupid now a days. Sorry.

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A female reader, Mushgirl United Kingdom +, writes (10 February 2008):

Mushgirl agony auntWhoa, I mean. Like he is FLIRTING with you, girl, no doubt about it. You don't call someone's legs amazing if you ain't coming on to them. Mind you, you don't say that if you're a teacher, either... but if you like him back... that's cool with me. I mean it's not like you're 13. Doesn't it freak you out though, if not just a little tiny bit? I used to fancy my boss, but if he ever actually said something hot to me, I was still like... why are you saying this...?! You know?

If everything you've said is true (I don't mean you're lying, I mean... whoa are you exaggerating?!) then I'd say, he has the hots for you. He finds you sweet and good-looking and gets on well with you, and is probably asking himself WHY DO I HAVE A CRUSH ON A SCHOOLGIRL?!?

How old are you both? Is he like 60 or nearer your age? Are you 16 or 17?

It's so annoying when you get a 'forbidden' crush on someone, and everyone else tells to you to just forget it because it ain't happening. But don't forget he's human too. Although... you'd avoid a lot of trouble for you both by obviously not actually doing anything past this till you're 18 or at least left school.

Message me if ya wanna talk, good luck with your sexy teacher, don't get him into any trouble! ;) xxx

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A female reader, ?luvs_it? Ireland +, writes (9 February 2008):

?luvs_it? is verified as being by the original poster of the question

?luvs_it? agony auntIt is me again! I just wanna keep updating this.

I went to a charity concert in school and it finished at 10:30

All my friends went home.I was the only one left in the school except for a ganitor guy. My Dad rang me and told me he was gonna be about half an hour late. I went up to the recption area and sat on one of the seats. I saw my amazing gorgeous teacher Mr * come down to reception. He said;

You alright there *. You getting a lift?'

I said Yes. The janitor asked 'Will I lock up.'

Mr * said: I will. I'm just waiting for this gorgeous girl to get a lift.'

He turned to me and said; Not that i want you to leave I like your company, so I do.

He sat down right beside me with he shoulder against mine.

We started conversation and he flirted with me and leaned in really close to my face. I could help blushing but I just kept on smiling. he looked at my legs and he said;

Oh my God you have amazing legs and a beautiful face.' he said with a sexy smile. I said 'Aw thanks.'

He said: I'll just go lock up the back doors. Tell me when you're leaving.' He walked away and I saw his blushing face.

My DAd pulled up outside and was waving his hands and shouting out the window saying 'Come on! We haven't got all night! Come On!!!' I gave him a 'one minute' sign with my hand.

'Come On!' he said again.

I had to leave. I walked down and got into the car. Just as he we were pulling away I looked back and saw Mr * looking for me. He looked out the window and saw the car. I felt so bad

But the next day he said ' It's okey. YOu don't have to worry about that. It's okey.' and he touched my arm.

I AM IN LOVE WITH HIM!

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A male reader, 2old4this United States +, writes (8 February 2008):

2old4this agony auntHe is being flirtatious with you, but you just cant go that way right now. The trouble both of you could be in is so great. you gotta wait til you're 18. Besides, its innocent flirting right now so just leave it at that. When he comes up to you and says he wants to take you out on a date then that's when it becomes a problem.

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A female reader, ?luvs_it? Ireland +, writes (7 February 2008):

?luvs_it? is verified as being by the original poster of the question

?luvs_it? agony auntthe otha day i walked into his class late because i had to go to matron because i hurt my jaw really bad. He told me to sit down straight away. Then when the rest of the class were busy he came up to me and said quietly in a deep voice.

'What happened to your face?'

I said ' Somebody wacked into me. It doesnt look deformed does it?'

He said ' No you still have the beautiful face' and smiled and walked away

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (2 February 2008):

i think that you just need to ask him why he treats you diffrent from all the other girls .. you can also have your friends talk to him with you .. it helps my friend is just like that ,,, hope this helps ^j^ :):):)

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (30 January 2008):

Hi, i know exactly what you mean. i am having this problem at the moment. i really like me teacher too whos 32 and 'm 16. though i dont see age a problem at all. i think he likes me too by the way he looks at me and he does just stare at me at times. But i enjoy it beacuse i like him.

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A female reader, Lady Aunt United Kingdom +, writes (27 January 2008):

Right, I used to think my french teacher liked me when he was teaching us.

I got exactly the same thing in yr 7 from my teacher and one person even asked him if he fancied me!

It was the talk of the century on my school!

Just let him get on with it and if it getts any worse then go the deputy head and talk to him/her or go have a talk to your teacher and ask him what the hell he's playing at!

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A female reader, lil miss helper United Kingdom +, writes (26 January 2008):

hi i think ur teacher is just being nice i woudnt worry about it

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A female reader, Mushgirl United Kingdom +, writes (26 January 2008):

Mushgirl agony aunt"From what you've said he's attracted. I suggest you tell the head teacher. It's wrong and he's going against Teacher-Pupil regulations."

Nooo! DON'T tell the headteacher. I know xpathyxrebornx is just trying to prevent you from a deranged peodophillic attack from this man, but this is not necessary!

There are a lot of teachers who act a bit more 'intimately' than most people. For one thing, that's partly why they are teachers - they are confident to communicate well. Also some of the more old-fashioned teachers don't really seemed to have grasped the fact that if they just give a kid a reassuring pat on the back after breaking a leg during football practice, they could be done for harrassment. I think he's just being friendly, and to be honest, even if he does find you a bit hot, I doubt he is pleased about it. He won't go further than this I don't think. So DON'T tell the headmaster, or he could end up jobless for the rest of his life just because he asked someone for a textbook and they took it the wrong way. Meanwhile I wouldn't take the lift home. If he does have feelings, you don't want to tempt him.

Just carry on being friendly to him, teachers are humans too mostly xxx

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A female reader, Rolly United Kingdom +, writes (16 January 2008):

Even if he did, it would be foolish for him to act on it at this point in time because not only are you a minor still, you are also his student. It could lose him his JOB, and get him arrested.

Enjoy the flirting, but it must stay like that. At least for now, if you are patient you could try contacting him after you graduate.

Good luck!

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A female reader, Laura1318 Malaysia +, writes (16 January 2008):

Laura1318 agony auntYou maybe his favorite student and he likes you.You are beautiful and being a man , he can't help looking at you.

There is nothing inappropriate in his behavior unless he touches you intentionally or being suggestive.

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A male reader, Jamer70 United Kingdom +, writes (16 January 2008):

Jamer70 agony auntTruthly i agree with all of female anons points. He is a teacher and is just trying to have a friendly working experience with his students. Maybe looking at your legs is slightly inappriotpiate but other than that he is being nice.

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A female reader, xapathyxrebornx United Kingdom +, writes (16 January 2008):

xapathyxrebornx agony auntFrom what you've said he's attracted. I suggest you tell the head teacher. It's wrong and he's going against Teacher-Pupil regulations.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (16 January 2008):

It's hard to say whether he likes you or not. Here are my thoughts:

1. Not a big deal. If everyone's working, and he's not doing anything, he probably gets bored and stares at something/someone. Staring and watching are different though. If he watches you, then I would say he potentially likes you. As for looking you in the eye, I'd hope he'd look you in the eye. If he openly stared at your shirt, that'd be creepy.

2. You seem to sit near the front, and he knows you'll let him borrow your book. It's nice to have someone to depend on like that, rather than hitting up everyone in the class at random in search of a book to borrow. I'd say this is nothing.

3. Again, nothing. Maybe he favors you. You're nice to him obviously since you let him borrow your book, and people like nice people. It's not personal.

4. You're nice to him; he's nice to you. This is a friendly action, not a romantic one.

5. Not sure I understand where you'd be "stuck", but... I don't know. The fact that you said "scarily" is significant. Don't put yourself in a situation you don't want to be in. Just ask him to back off if you're uncomfortable. But yeah, he seems to like you at least as a friend. Does he do that with anyone else, or just you? If it's typical, he might just not have an issue with personal space boundaries.

6. If you have nice legs and wear shorter skirts or form-fitting jeans, you're kind of putting it out there, so yeah, he's going to stare along with a lot of other people. If he ever touched your legs, though, I'd say that's an issue. The only thing definate here is that he finds you visually appealing.

7. The road to hell is paved with good intentions. He's trying to be a nice guy, and you're accusing him of something inappropriate. Avoid accusations like that. Staring at your legs and offering you a ride home in the rain are entirely different. In the first, there's no friendliness involved. In the second, that's all it is.

If you want to see how he feels, accidently brush his hand with yours or something like that. Gauge his reaction. A jump means that he feels something, whatever that something may be. If he doesn't really notice, he feels nothing. Flirt with him, I say. Enjoy this while it lasts, even if it never develops into anything. Good luck!!

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A male reader, 2old4this United States +, writes (16 January 2008):

2old4this agony auntThis happens all the time. The best thing to do is leave it alone. People get in alot of trouble over stuff like this. Girls mature faster than guys, so it's natural for you to find older men attractive. But, you just cant do anything like that. If after you turn 18 and you left school, maybe drop him a line and test the water. BUT THATS IT....!

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