A
male
age
41-50,
*azanco
writes:A question that will ignite a debate, we men although may have the most beautiful wife/girlfriend but we keep on looking at other women, we don't get enough! although we may be having the best woman...Are women like us in nature, do they look at men even if they are in a relationship? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 July 2011): Yes they do, I have experienced this first hand at work, where a married female colleague started looking at and paying me a lot of attention, over the space of a few months.
It didnt really develop into a friendship but we did get on well there for a while.
Sadly though we no longer see each other much but she still gives me the eye when our paths do cross (I wish i could read minds, but only sometimes ;))
A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (26 July 2011):
 Fancy as what? If you want us to compare notes you will have to be more specific at how exactly you look, what exactly you fancy doing with these women you look at.
My guess will still be that there's no gender separation, only a difference from person to person.
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A
female
reader, maverick494  +, writes (26 July 2011):
Lets be honest here: we all appreciate beauty. Women in particular are very sensitive to that kind of thing. Look at all the tumbler accounts with 'inspiration' pictures of pretty girls/women that female teens have up and running. That said, for most of us that's where it ends. I can appreciate a handsome looking man without feeling like I want to pursue him.
That said, whenever I'm in the 'honeymoon' phase of a relationship, all my attention is geared towards him and I will barely notice other men. I'm not clingy or anything (quite the opposite) but when I'm crazy about someone my eye is satisfied. When that 'pink glasses' phenomenon passes, I start to notice everyone else again. But like I said, just because I notice the beauty doesn't mean I want to sleep with him. There's a big difference.
Also the idea that every man fancies every attractive woman he comes across is BS in my opinion. He may feel like this when he's single and on the prowl, but shouldn't be when he's in a committed relationship.
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (26 July 2011):
 are you saying that if you see an attractive woman you want to have sex with her is that what you mean by fancy her?
I often say to my friends (or BF even) "can I put him/her on my TO-DO list???" it's a tongue in cheek way of saying I think someone is attractive enough to have sex with. IF that's fancying them then yes I guess I do...
again I don't see an issue with it. Attractive people who are my type are a delight to look at... eye candy is a good thing...
I guess I'm just very secure with my relationship and know that looking is NOT buying...
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male
reader, yazanco +, writes (26 July 2011):
yazanco is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI found the majority do look at men, but the critical question is, do you fancy men like we do fancy women, we do fancy every woman we meet if she is attractive?
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A
female
reader, MissTellAll +, writes (26 July 2011):
 Of course we look! Pretending not to is the problem. My ex used to hate if I admitted a guy other than him was attractive.
Noticing is just fine. It's when we catch you drooling over that girl in the tight dress walking by that we get a little jealous. It's a normal reaction. Most women want to be the only one their guy want and I'd believe that feeling is mutual for the most part. It's hard not to notice. Some women may be so insecure as to want you to lie to them and say that the other woman isn't attractive. Ah, the lovely world of ignorance...
Sorry, I'm babbling. YES, we look.
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A
female
reader, Aunty Honest  +, writes (26 July 2011):
 Of course both genders look! You're still human you still have eyes.
The only thing that annoys me is when men (or women) do that thing where they pretend someone isn't attractive/worth looking at who quite blatantly is-lets not insult each other's intelligence! Or suggest that we're that easily threatened!
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 July 2011): of course we do! most of us anyway.. but what i notice the most is a guy who's personality stands out.. a guy who's personality can catch my attention in a few brief minutes is ogle-able.. and sometimes even rememberable!
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (26 July 2011):
 Of course I look, it's very normal. Looking at beautiful objects is a great source of enjoyment.
I look at beautiful artwork in museums. I look at shop windows full of splendid jewels that I don't mean to buy, at wonderful houses where I don't mean to live, at cute puppies and kittens that I don't mean to own. And I also look at very attractive men that I don't mean to approach or to touch ever .
I only look though, I don't ogle or stare :).
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female
reader, RedAthena +, writes (25 July 2011):
 Sure, why not? I am still alive and the hormones still flow.
I just do not ACT on my impuslive looking:)
I have a saying "Just because you are on a diet, does not mean you can not look at the menu once in awhile...I just do not order!"
I have always been ok with my guy looking too.
The saying for that is "Sure you can look at the menu, as long as you dine at home"
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female
reader, angelDlite +, writes (25 July 2011):
 yeah we do. its only natural to look, like we look at everything else in our surroundings. if we like the look of something we will look at it longer. ogling is uncalled for, (especially if we are with our partner) it does not mean we want to cheat. men and women look at others, but women know how to do it subtly so they don't get caught! (so i've heard)
x
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female
reader, JustAGirl.x +, writes (25 July 2011):
 i used to take huge offence if my OH looked at another girl, would really upset me! but then one day i just realized its natural, and its fine for him to have a little glance, its when he stares it pisses me off and upsets me!
in my own experience i have never really stared or even looked at other guys, it just doesn't do it for me at all and i dont really take notice of attractive guys, people i used to know would comment on how i didn't take notice! if i did, my OH wouldn't mind because its completely normal! probably if i was staring then he would get all hot and bothered!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 July 2011): Haha of course we do! Fantasising about your own significant other just isn't right!!
Look, fantasise and occasionally flirt but never touch is my motto. Naturally my husband is free to do the same
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (25 July 2011):
I do.
I also window shop and don't buy things...
I'm in a committed relationship NOT DEAD
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female
reader, chigirl +, writes (25 July 2011):
It's not a nature thing, is a personality thing. I think is is quite common for all people to look, we do have eyes, we're bound to observe our surroundings. So in that sense we all look. But to what degree we look variate, and that depends on the person, not the gender.
Yes, women can look as well. But some women don't, just like some men don't. And some men cheat, and some women cheat. And then a whole bunch are in the middle of looking without taking it too far, some look and flirt, while others steal a few peeks and nothing more.
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 July 2011): Its natural to look and i think its healthy but i think if you are undressing the guy girl in your mind then your out of order, i know guys in relationships that are terrible when it comes to pretty girls walking by but i also know guys that just keep walking...they acknowledge them but don't ogle them.
I think it shows a lack of respect for your partner if your eyeing up another person in a crude manner.
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female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (25 July 2011):
 Of course we look. Of course!!There are probably some women who don't... I'm sure such women exist. But I am guessing that they are few and far between. Yes, we glance, we glimpse - sometimes we drool. I'm married to a hunk and a half, but that did not stop me from checking out the butt of the incredibly foxy police officer who pulled me over to tell me that my light was out. I think that woman are a lot more subtle - we know how to not ogle or creeper-stare. Guys can be a bit shameless and their eyes bug out of their head and salivate. And that is why we ladies get pissed - at least we are tactful (a.k.a sneaky) and spare you the embarrassment of practically doing backflips over some cutie. There are my two cents! Let's see what the other Cupiders think...
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female
reader, VSAddict +, writes (25 July 2011):
 I think most, if not all, women do. We can't help if someone crosses our line of view and they happen to be attractive. I think it's normal and fine to do since it's just looking and nothing more. Some women may disagree.
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