A
female
age
30-35,
*issxmexagainx
writes:I have a question. I know, I have a lot of questions, but I also have a lot of answers, so I think it balances out =]I've noticed that a lot of guys I know have, over the past few years, said that I am so hot and sexy. They say they want to have sex with me and talk about me in sexual ways to their friends. also they make comments about my breasts a lot [I'm a 32DD]. mind you, I hate this.But I don't see what they mean. I always thought I was the "cute girl" not sexy or hot. I really don't think I'm all that attractive, kinda pretty at best. I'm very short [5'2''] was 97 lbs [I'm pregnant now so I weigh more] have red hair, pail skin and and my shoulders are covered in freckles.I'm always bubbly and happy around my friends, but never flirty or "sexy".I am a sex addict, but these guys don't know that and and I'm in a committed relationship with a guy who really doesn't talk about our sex life to people.so why do guys say I'm sexy as opposed to being cute?ps- how could I get less sexual attention from guys. I think they're being rude and and pervy.
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female
reader, kissxmexagainx +, writes (10 April 2009):
kissxmexagainx is verified as being by the original poster of the question thank you everyone. like I said in my earlier response, I am a t-shirt && jeans type of girl. I don't wear much skimpy clothes. I mean at the moment my breasts pop out of everything but It's cuz I am pregnant. My question is about before I got pregnant though.
I have been told that even though I don't act sexual, I seem to have this sexual aura around me. I don't know what to do about that though. I do think I'll tell guys that their comments make me uncomfortable.
you've all been a lot of help =] thank you
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (10 April 2009): Some girls just exude a more sexual vibe than others. (So do some guys.) It's not necessarily about boobs or muscles or any kind of good looks, either. It's like there's more and less sexuality just coming right out of the pores of certain people.I know this doesn't help much but it's all I can tell you. The others are right, don't tolerate anything you shouldn't and draw firm boundaries with people on this stuff.
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A
female
reader, jellybeans +, writes (10 April 2009):
I don't think this has something to do with your body shape. I am 5"5 and 110lb, and 32DD breats but all the people think I am the "nerdy and conservative one".
Next time, tell your frds that you are not comfortable with their attitude toward you and they will change.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (10 April 2009): Like all women, you are in the driver's seat. Say, "I don't think that's appropriate." Guys will CHANGE their tune very quickly, AND respect you more. If you don't call them on it, they frankly think you like it. Also, how are you dressed? Are you inviting this blunt talk by guys by the way you dress? talk? look? Most guys don't talk that way to women that they respect. Look in the mirror. You might be inviting thisese comments without being (fully) aware of it.
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A
female
reader, KorR?whotochoose +, writes (10 April 2009):
i don't know if this is helpful or not, but i read once in cosmo that when a guy sees a girl as sexy he only wants her for sex, but when a guy views a girl as cute he sees her as girlfriend potential..........this probably doesn't apply to you, but think what you want them to view you as, wholesome gf potential, even though you have a bf, it is still nice to have people like you, or as the sex kitten that they wish they could bed, but know they never will.....since you are a self professed sex addict, you are probably giving off a more sexual vibe then you think............so decide how you want to be seen and dress/act accordingly........btw, you could decide that you don't want to be viewed as cute or sexy, but what fun would that be???....lol
Good luck,
H
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A
female
reader, kissxmexagainx +, writes (9 April 2009):
kissxmexagainx is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you honeypie. I really don't want to have to change who I am.
but it still upsets me when thet act that way.
also I forgot to add, I get along with guys way better than girls[ girls tend to start drama] but eventually my "friends" end up trying to get in my pants. I now have very few friends.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (9 April 2009):
 Ignore them. Wear what you want to wear. You don't have to start looking dumpy or hide yourself because other are raised in a barn.
However if you do like to show of your clevage then yeah you will get comments. Sad but true.
Don't change for others. IF you see yourself as being cute then be cute:) You can not change how people look at you or percieve you.
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A
female
reader, kissxmexagainx +, writes (9 April 2009):
kissxmexagainx is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you for your advice. actually I never wear clothes that reveal any cleavage unless it's a formal dress or something. I'm normally the t-shirt && ripped up blue jeans type of girl =]
but as far as being friendly, I'll try to watch how I act. My boyfriend has commented before that I seem like I'm flirting, even though he knows I'm not. how can I tone it down without being fake though?
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A
female
reader, kellyxxx  +, writes (9 April 2009):
 Try less revealing clothes (I get the impression if they are staring at your boobs that they are probably looking at a low cut top) or wear loose fitting tops. Don't be too friendly with guys, they probably take what you say in the wrong way. Look on the net for body language which is flirty, you may be giving off signals and not realising it. X
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