A
male
age
18-21,
anonymous
writes:Hello! I was wondering, is there anything technically wrong with a 19 year old male dating a 26 year old female.. with two twin kids? Maybe it's just a crush, but I believe I'm pretty into her. Obviously older men date younger girls, but is it frowned upon the other way around? Thank you for any opinions or insight!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Deema  + ♥, writes (8 April 2008):
 I don't think you have a problem at all. My partner is much younger than me, but we have the same values, and thats what is important. He is very mature for his age too, and has no desire to do many of the things people of his own age do. But, there are times when the age difference matters, and sometimes there are things he just doesn't understand cos he's never been there before, and I have, and that is when we can clash. Because we love each other and get on wellmost of the time its easy to forget the age difference and that can cause problems too. But your age difference is not too big. If you're mature enough to handle having a ready made family, well give it a go. No one says it has to be forever anyway. Best wishes.
A
female
reader, happytochat  + ♥, writes (7 April 2008):
The reason relationships with big age gaps dont always work is because the people are at different stages in there life so they just arent right for each other at that point in time and sometimes they may never match up.
So you have to find out what are her needs, wants and expectations from you? Does she want a serious relationship, someone to perhaps father her children? Or is she looking for something casual with no hopes of it going further? Does she want anymore kids? Do you want kids somday of your own? And ask yourself what do YOU want from her and then see if you both will fit. If you do then there is nothing wrong with this.
Also keep in mind that when you are 19 you are will growing, maturing and changing.You arent yet the man you wil be for the rest of your life. You are in the process of shaping your identity. Hopefully she is mature enough to realise this and realises you may not stay the same person you were when she met you.
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A
female
reader, MissWendlemoot + ♥, writes (7 April 2008):
 I suppose the only problem i could see is that at 19 you'll be growing and changing a lot in the next 5 years or so.
She may be looking for someone to settle down with eventually. Just be honest and fair with her.
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A
male
reader, guillaume + ♥, writes (7 April 2008):
Hi,
The age gap is fine, and I wasn't aware that it was frowned upon to have an older female.
One point though.....remember you are 19 and she has 2 children. This is a big committment for you if this is going to be long term. I'm only telling you this as a helpful "aunt." I know you know this, but just make sure that if it does have some future, you are aware of all the expenses and altered lifestyle. best wishes, G.
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A
male
reader, Dr Vendetta +, writes (7 April 2008):
 i was 19 she was 32.
older women know what they're doing.
Gigidy.
shit, i'm 25 now. i'd be lucky to date a 26 year old.
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A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (7 April 2008):
 It is really fairly hard for most people to judge ages within about a ten year range for one thing, plus most anything goes these days. When I was about 25, one steady girlfriend for more than a year was 36, and that was during the mid-1970s. Nobody thought anything of it as I recall. Only those who may be aware of the age difference would likely have an opinion, but who cares. You should not, however, go around making anything of it or bragging about the relationship, which would demonstrate a lack of immaturity on your part. Just be cool and keep matters to yourself.
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