A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Are there guys out there who actually DON'T like strip clubs? I live in a mining town and strip clubs are starting to pop up everywhere, and since mining is a very male dominated field, guys go there after work to bond, and blah blah. I've been told that if you have the cash you can even "release" a girl from the club and she can work as an escort. I've seen the girls, they look like they walked out of a porno, with huge fake tits, and huge butts (probably fake too), with tiny waists, bleach blond hair... I have a few male friends who are miners, and they regularly go, behind their girlfriends and wives backs. Maybe every week or so, maybe once every two weeks. They joke about it a lot, even in front of us (their female friends), because this is - like I said - a mining town, very male dominated, and therefore, going to strip clubs is very acceptable (even if you're married or in a relationship). Currently I'm single, but I'm afraid I'll never meet a guy with my values... I have no problem with porn, sure I'm not thrilled that a guy needs it or whatever but I understand and accept it, but only because those women are fantasy and not "at hands reach". But the strippers look exactly like these "fantasy" girls, except they're real and you can actually have sex with them if you have the money! From what I've heard if you so much as buy them a drink (albeit a very overpriced one), they'll let you touch their breasts or see their vulva. That's scary! I wouldn't want my boyfriend or husband to be spending time and money on that! But like I said this is part of our city's culture, and therefore, acceptable. I look nothing like those girls, I don't have luxurious thick hair, I have small boobs, I have cellulite, etc. I can work my ass off in the gym, but even then I'll never look like them! I'm so scared, are all guys really into that or are there guys who find the whole idea repulsive? (I wouldn't want to sleep with a guy who has slept with hookers either, maybe it's judgmental of me, but I have to look after my health)
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, C. Grant +, writes (5 June 2015):
 Yes there are guys who don't like strip clubs. They're usually dirty, dark and depressing. Lots of the time the girls are just going through the motions. And the current style of all fake and buffed doesn't appeal to me at all.
There are good guys out there. The might be a bit harder to find in a small one-macho-industry town, but they're there. Don't settle.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 June 2015): I got married recently and in the UK it's traditional for the groom to go to a strip club for their stag do. I felt obliged to tell my fiance that it would be ok if he wanted to visit a strip club although lapdances etc were not acceptable.
His response was that he'd already discussed it with his mates and they'd all decided they'd much rather go paintballing instead.
He cited the various reasons mentioned here previously; fake looking women, the expense etc. He even gave me a bit of a lecture on how stripping objectifies women! As if I wanted him to go!
I agree with mfj78's brilliant post about male dominated occupations attracting alpha males as my now hubby works in the building industry and he has a fair share of Neanderthal mates but this goes to show that not all men like that kind of thing.:)
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A
male
reader, CMMP  +, writes (5 June 2015):
I don't care for them but am not morally opposed to them. I just don't like fake people and spending a bunch of money. I also prefer to see my wife naked at this point.
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A
male
reader, mfj78  +, writes (5 June 2015):
HelloI've never been to a strip club, have no interest in doing so and find the whole thing a bit, well, tacky. If others wish to go or women (assuming by free choice) wish to work in such an industry then that's their business but personally I find it a bit pointless.Don't get me wrong, I like women's bodies as much as the next guy and its only natural to be aroused and excited by the opposite sex. But for me real women, rather than some plastic kit put together to please horny, drunken "geezers" is something I don't go for.Personally I hate the whole fake tits, fake ass (WTF?!), hair extensions, long fake nails, heavy tan and tacky, slutty shoes look on a woman. Apart from Wilma from the Flintstones, a Plain Jane type is more my thing. I do think a lot of what you have heard is exaggerated, although in my local pub you get to do more than see a vulva for the price of a pack of pork scratching and half a shandy. No, most strip clubs have a no touching policy. Maybe its different over the pond but here in the UK one is expected to mainly keep ones hands to ones self. (Although the only time the men take both their hands out of their pockets is to pay £37 for a pack of peanuts.) To be fair, putting aside the possibility of sex or "extras", the stripper industry is huge now for BOTH sexes. The Chipendales, not to be confused with (Chip AND Dale the rescue rangers) and the british 1990s hit film "The Full Monty" increased awareness of and interest in male strippers. Male strippers, usually with well built, toned, oiled up bodies (Bit like my own obviously) that most mere mortals cannot compete with parade around jiggering their boys bits about inside a ridiculously tight pair of (very) briefs while screaming housewives wet there knickers and fondle their bulging Pecs. I do think there is a difference in perception between women seeing a stripper, and men. Im reminded of a Jasper Carrott joke (JC being a well known UK comedian from my own home town): "When men go to see a stripper its because they are perverts, when women go to see a stripper its because 'it's a laugh!'"Some people like strippers, others do not. Strangely, in my home town most women who go to see young, fit, muscly, manly men strip for pleasure or amusement are aged about 65, with a cigarette perched behind their ear, wearing their best cheap fake leopard skin fur coat with beer stains all over it, teetering about on 9 inch heels, squeezed into a size 6 pair of leggings while dropping their crisps everywhere and screaming obscenities unbecoming of someone of pensionable age. In my experience of knowing various people over the years who do frequent strip joints, its usually your typical "Apha Male" types who are the most common visitors. Guys with something to prove, trying to assert their heterosexuality and compete with other men for the role of dominant male who have to keep asseting their "manliness", who feel that there is no better way to leave no-one in any doubt about their testosterone levels and manly status than have their drunken friends cheer as they get a breast in their face in return for slipping a five pound note down some girls crack. Im not saying ALL men who frequent strip clubs are like that, but you say you live in a mining town. That is probably part of the issue where you live. Talking very generally from my own experience of towns and cities with heavy industry type occupations, and at the risk of prejudice, that's a tough, dare I say "manly" occupation where prejudice, male competition and the need to be seen to be a "real man" sadly means there is little room for gay men, sensitive guys or flower arranging mommies boys like me. The way those guys bond is therefore to prove and compete, show their manliness and act tough and masculine. Strip clubs make ideal places for that. Mark
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (5 June 2015):
 Yes, there ARE guys out there who don't frequent strip clubs or sleep with strippers/call-girls/prostitutes. And there are guy out there who can spot the difference from a "porn star looking girl" to an average girl and who actually prefer the real deal not the fake boobs, tan and bleach.
I would NOT compare myself to those girls. Because there is no point. If a guy likes "that" kind of girl YOU may not be HIS cup of tea, but he CERTAINLY won't be yours either.
If you met a guy and get to know him, ASK him what he thinks of strip clubs, ask him casually... See what he says. It might give you an idea of what kind of guy he is.
I have lived on several military installations, there are ALWAYS a few strip clubs near by (some of the strippers were GF's of soldiers - some were wives, believe it or not). PLENTY of guy and gals didn't waste money on these places. Because that is really what it is. A waste of money. And a glorified excuse for people to view women at pieces of meat.
The thing is you are worried that a guy might have slept with a stripper... well, yes that would not be something to brag about (at least not to a girl you want to impress) but he could as easily have slept with a girl who will have sex with anyone willing.... Strippers are NOT all prostitutes too. Some "only" go in take of her clothes while dancing then go home.
As as for the wanting to be healthy, I get it. When you met a good guy who you SHARE values with, HAVE a STD panel done with him, so you BOTH know where you stand. And use precautions.
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A
male
reader, empty-1 +, writes (5 June 2015):
There is nothing 'judgmental' about looking after your health.
Now - I'll be one of the first to defend a person's right to sexual entertainment, as well as a woman's right to work in the industry if she so chooses.
Do bear in mind that -NO- man 'needs' porn. If he thinks he does, he has psychological problems, and the porn is a symptom, not the cause.
However.
There is a line between blowing off a few bucks to have a drink while watching, vs being in a place where actual prostitution is going on. Especially for a married bloke. Cheating is cheating, and while I endorse entertainment - I also endorse individual personal responsibility - Fantasy and reality need to be kept separate.
To directly answer your question - yes, there are guys who do not like strip clubs. Some of them for reasons similar to your own, but others for reasons you haven't mentioned. Personally, I don't like them all that much, because I find them to be a waste of money. Triple priced drinks, and expensive tips to watch a girl take off her clothes - I can do that for free, and I can drink while I do it for much less.
Some guys have religious or moral objections, some like me, find these places to be horrible money sinks, others have a hard time keeping their hands to themselves, which, in most clubs around here is a good way to get thrown out, permanently if he's a repeat offender.
To address your concerns - you need to worry less about how you're different from these 'fantasy girls'. They all have a very plastic, fake look, and there are plenty of guys (many of them pretty good looking) who don't find the look of these girls attractive. Bear in mind, what these girls sell is the visual fantasy - and they have to go over the top. However, most guys wouldn't want someone like that as a keeper, and many wouldn't even like to try one on for size.
It does sometimes seem interminable, however, you will, with patience, find someone who is attracted to YOUR look, type, and style. There are people out there in this big crazy world who like any and every body type, size, shape, and color.
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A
male
reader, Garbo +, writes (5 June 2015):
 Yea, most guys, single especially, will go and praise strip bars while fully cognizant that, no matter how dolled up those strippers are, he would never actually marry one. And it does become a problem in making friends if the guy is like me who will bluntly tell anyone that only stupid men visit strip joints because if it takes money for a dude to see, touch or have sex with a girl it means that he is way too stupid to find a woman who will gladly give it to him for free. So, yes, there are men who never step foot in joints like those and frankly, those girls, being such trash, would have to pay me to even utter a word to them let alone salivate over them. Basically, keep looking until you find a sober guy who understands priorities of life and behaves accordingly. It may require you to get out that small mining town or look for other places in it to meet a man. Nor should you compare yourself to such women whose use value is as long as the time their makeup can remain on their faces.
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