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*alum424 agony aunt

*alum424

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*alum424's profile:

I'm a 28 years old and a pround father a cute 2 year old little girl.First let me start by telling I'm not Mr. Nice nor am I Mr. Sinister. I've done my fair share of hurting feelings and having mine hurt in return.So I know abit about feelings and pull from my own life to help answer things.

I live in Louisana I'm part of the National Guard yep I'm a weekend warrior and proud of it lol.

My son's girlfriend died in a car accident, and he has not been able to move on, can you provide any advice so I can help him?

Q.   My 22 yr old son was in a car accident a year ago and his 19 yr old girlfriend died. I understand that it was hard for him but I am really wooried about him. He hasnt moved on at all. In one full year he has not lef tthe house unless he was forced. ...

A.   8 May 2009: Well other then letting him know you care about him there really isn't much more you can do for him but what every you do, do not force him to move on to fast I know a year may seem like along time to you but he was the one in the car with her not ... (read in full...)

We have been together for 20 years and I am looking for something new in the sex department, any suggestions?

Q.   I have been having a sexual relationship with this guy for over 20 years. I know he is totally happy with what I do, but I am really kinda looking for something new to do. I love giving him oral sex, but I need something new. I've tried different ...

A.   8 May 2009: You could try video taping yourselves, maybe so light role playing you know like the handy man and the sexy house wife, or you could mix the two together and make your own porn to watch together later.Semi public sex meaning go to a camp ground get ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend would rather climax watching porn, than satisfiy me, what can I do about this, please help?

Q.   I have been with my boyfriend for almost 3 years. He enjoys porn alot. I mean alot. At first we had sex frequently and he appeared to enjoy himself. I have always had a high sex drive myself. However, when we were first together he did not ...

A.   8 May 2009: Let me see if I have this right he has sex with you but doesn't climax right? Well it maybe lack of sesitivity in his man bit that stops him from climaxing prolonged masturbation well toughen the skin a the tip of the penis where must of the nerve ... (read in full...)

Lost love - normal to see them in another person?

Q.   Hello there, I have a small question to ask. When you fall in love with someone, you become completely attached to them and devote your time, self and thoughts to them, right? But, if you lose them, either through death, distance or just ...

A.   7 May 2009: it normal to look for the traits that mades us fall in love with someone in others people.... (read in full...)

I would be the luckiest girl in the world if I married him....but I cant express my feelings to him!

Q.   Hi guys.. i need a big help.. i love my friends.. i have a guy friend.. i like him a lot.. i use to tel everything to him always. but he is not. he is very calm and stubborn. but he likes me a lot. he use to say that am his dear.many of my friends ...

A.   7 May 2009: Tell him that you would never do anything to hurt your friendship with him but you need to know if he cares for you as more then a friend. I know I'm making it sound so easy but it takes a really leap of faith to do this one. the fear of losing a ... (read in full...)

He wont even kiss me in front of his friends because he thinks it is a sign of weakness!

Q.   Im so confused bout life that its making me dizzy literally in my head! I feel im always running out of time and that if i dont settle down get marrie and another child by 30 it will be too late. My main problem is that im really not happy with the ...

A.   7 May 2009: Because he's a stupid arse, or as we in the State like to say an ass monkey. To me the fact that he's so hung up on his own reputation is the biggest sign of weakness. The fact that he needs other to tell him what a big man he is just sad, and if ... (read in full...)

She says she cannot continue our relationship because she is cheating her parents!

Q.   i love my girlfriend very much.we even spended some nights together. i was her first boyfriend. she is a girl of 17yrs.. now she says that she cannot continue our relationship further. she says that she is cheating her parents... she says that she ...

A.   7 May 2009: She may want you to ask her parents if it's alright for you to date her, or she could feel like she truning away from the values her parents taught her.... (read in full...)

French kissing and wanting more?

Q.   A quick question when you are french kissing a guy and you feel how excited he is (if he puts your hand on it) is he wanting more and if so what does he actually want you to do, I am very inexperienced and I have never went any further than french ...

A.   7 May 2009: Wow old Guy I couldn't have put any better myself.what it sounds like to me was he wanted some heavy petting meaning he wanted you to touch his man bits as he touch your lady bits. ... (read in full...)

Seeing each other for 6 months but only got to second base?

Q.   My boyfriend and I have been official for 4 months now and seeing eachother for about 6 and we're only on second base. The only first move other than kissing he's ever made was to feel me up the first time; since then, I've been the one having to ...

A.   7 May 2009: there could be alot of thing going on his mind you could be his first, he's worried that his man bits are to small,he my not know what to do..down to*cough cough* stage fright.If you really what to seal the deal with him try gently leading him to ... (read in full...)

Can't get my boyfriend to stop being sneaky and watching porn behind my back!

Q.   Hi folks, this is making me upset while i'm thinking about it but i can't get my boyfriend to stop sneakily watching porn. It's so upsetting because i lost my virginity to him but that doesn't mean we don't have amazing sex. We play lots and i ...

A.   7 May 2009: Well it might just be the sneaking around is turning him on.The whole 'Oh I Should be doing this which makes it naughty and turns me on.'Try asking him why he likes gangbang porn so much. Plus I'm not being mean as open as you are with him sexually ... (read in full...)

My best friend introduced me to an abuser, and still wants to hang with him

Q.   I have been best friends with 'Jill' for well over ten years. In August of 2007 she met up with me downtown and brought one of her co-workers with named 'Jack'. We ended up hitting it off and he asked me out shortly after. We ended up dating ...

A.   7 May 2009: It seems you found your own answer. Like I said weigh the pros and the cons and the cons came out heavier. I wish that it hadn't turned out like that.What I'd do now is take a step away from her not cut her out of your life just don't spend as much ... (read in full...)

I'm registered to a dating website, but I never get a reply. What makes a good opening message?

Q.   Hey, I'm registered to a dating website. What is a good opening message to send to a girl your interested in? Any time I send a message, girls seem to read it and either deleted or not reply. It'd be nice to get a reply. What can I do?...

A.   4 May 2009: I have to go with Grimm Reality on comedy. It shows that you don't take yourself to seriously, and let's face it how many guys use super stud, sweet lonely man or some other lame crap along those lines. By being funny you'll stand out more and more ... (read in full...)

I think I did the right thing but why do I feel so sad now?

Q.   I was dating this guy for a couple months. He told me that he doesnt believe in labels and that we are not boyfriend/girlfriend but we'll just go with the flow. Even though I told him I dont do anything without a commitment, he asked for oral sex. ...

A.   4 May 2009: You feel bad because you care about him, but to me it seems like you did the right thing. You saw what kinda of relationship was a head of you if you stayed with him.... (read in full...)

Delayed ejaculation and unsensitive penis, help!

Q.   Hi, my boyfriend has problems with delayed ejaculation, he can always please himself but very rarely gets to orgasm through sex. he also seems to have a very unsensitive penis, he says he cant really feel anything, even fellatio, I think the ...

A.   3 May 2009: lotions and baby oils well help return sensitivity, by softing skin at the top of the penis. Grape seed oils is the best for this. It's cheap about $5 a gallon and and sfe if any get into his litle pe hole at the top.... (read in full...)

20 year old boy with a serious problem

Q.   Hello everybody, I'm a 20 year-old boy with a HUGE problem. I'm living in Germany now for almost 2 years, and in this time I've got to know different people. 2 months ago I met a girl who is 14, 15 in 3 months(... this is being so hard to write...). ...

A.   3 May 2009: I think the best thing to do is to cut off all contact with her like you had tried.Stand firm you and know that you're doing the right thing for yourself by cutting her out of your life. Just remember that you've over came a tragic upbring that you ... (read in full...)

Lonely in a bad marriage

Q.   So me and my husband are in a really bad spot right now, and I don't see it working out. We are going to start couseling, but that is not for another week. The problem I am having is I and really stressed out, and it is making me want to have ...

A.   3 May 2009: I'm afraid not, but friends and family can help ease the pain. I wish I could help more because I really do know what you're going through.I also hope everything turns out for the best with you and your husband.... (read in full...)

Was he sincere?

Q.   A month ago my went out of town for a few weeks with another woman and lied to me about it. We have tried to talk, but nothing is getting resolved, we start therapy this week, but I am not hopeful. Well, a few days ago he left this note in my car, ...

A.   3 May 2009: When it comes to the note I'll have to say a bit of both he may really feel bad about what he did and was the note was to help you make you happy again. but it seems his lying to you is the really problem that he needs to work now.... (read in full...)

I'm 13 and female and my friend (female) kissed me... thing is I liked it. Is this wrong?

Q.   hi well here's the story and its long but i really need help so please read it all. im a girl, I'M 13 and i spent the night at my friend M's house last night and my other friend C spent the night too. we went to M's house right after school and we ...

A.   3 May 2009: First off no there is nothiong wrong with this. 13 is a weird age your body is starting to change and your sexaul inertest is starting to devople. It maybe that you enjoyed it because of your feelings of friendship, and kinship, but like i said no ... (read in full...)

I don't think she has my best interests at heart...

Q.   I have this friend of mine, I say she's my friend, I wasnt working for a year and a half, she is working, we chat and laugh on the phone about her business. during that year she never called me then one day she called and asks me if I'd found a job, ...

A.   2 May 2009: It sounds to me that she really has your best interests at heart when it comes to helping you find a job is just offering you a helping hand.... (read in full...)

I skipped the depo shot that was due in April, how long before I can start ovulating again?

Q.   I took my first depo shot in jan. My next one was due in april ,but I didn't get it, because me and my boyfriend want to start having kids. Well, how long untill my body goes back to normal and I can start ovulating again?...

A.   2 May 2009: anywhere from right away to 2 years but must commonly about 6 to 7 months.... (read in full...)

She's been abused and has mood swings, but I want to help her!

Q.   I am having trouble dealing with a friend who is recovering from an abusive relationship. And I am asking "What do I do next?" I am at wit's end and ready to give up... but I love her and don't want her to fall back into a bad situation. I ...

A.   2 May 2009: You've help her as much as you can right now. The only thing you can doright now is let her know that you'll always standby her as a friend and move forward with you're life.... (read in full...)

For the boys: Innocent or not innocent? Tall or short? Athletic or not?

Q.   i want to know what the guys out there look for in a girl.. do you (guys) like girls that look more innocent or not innocent? do you prefer girls that are tall? or short? do you prefer girls that are athletic or not athletic?...

A.   2 May 2009: so what you're really asking is cute vs hot well I like the cute girl with a little meat on their bones as for tall or short both because I'm on the short side at 5'7"/170 cm so hieght never really seem that big a deal to me, that and everyone is ... (read in full...)

I want to know, will I be a bad person if I have sex?

Q.   I need help....I am 14 and i have been dating this 17 year old for almost 9 months and we have did oral....And I think im ready for PROtected sex. I want to know will i be a bad person if i do this? ...

A.   2 May 2009: No you will not be a bad person for having sex, but on the same note if you're here asking this then it seems to me that you aren't really ready for sex.The best thing I can tell you is it's your body and don't let anyone pressure you into sex ... (read in full...)

Crisis: My hatred for writing is making me miserable

Q.   I’m 25 and I’m really embarrassed to say that I’m having a crisis tonight because I hate writing reports. This problem has really grown out of proportion and I’m so miserable right now. It’s been a problem in the past but now my head feels like ...

A.   2 May 2009: Calm down first off you don't sem to hate writing or you wouldn't have sent in the message. What I think might be happening is a panic attack. Panic attackes happen when you have high levels of stress and you don't deal with them in a health way. ... (read in full...)

Should I be worried or grateful that my wife wants to have a threesome with me and another woman?

Q.   A month into our relationship, my wife confessed to me that she is bi-sexual and had had a few girl-on-girl experiences back in college. It's now been five years since we got together and two years since we've been married. No children yet, but the ...

A.   2 May 2009: The thing I feel you should ask is she doing this for herself or is she doing this thinking it'll make you happy. It seems to me that you're not really comfortable with this so tell her that you don't feel right about it. As for fearing she may leav... (read in full...)

My best friend introduced me to an abuser, and still wants to hang with him

Q.   I have been best friends with 'Jill' for well over ten years. In August of 2007 she met up with me downtown and brought one of her co-workers with named 'Jack'. We ended up hitting it off and he asked me out shortly after. We ended up dating ...

A.   2 May 2009: First off no you're not being mean by making her choose. This thing called 'Jack' is nothing more then a filthy animal who should be put down but that's just my opinion. But more to the point I can't tell you if 'Jill' is a good friend or not. What... (read in full...)

He dumped me for another girl -- what can I do?

Q.   k well it all started when my ex-boyfriend...let's call him "Tom"....well anyway I loved Tom but I could see he was losing interest in me. He started hanging out with this other girl let's call her "Kelly". Kelly and Tom started hanging out more ...

A.   2 May 2009: Well the sad truth is there really isn't anything you can do about them as a couple, but you can cut them out of your life by not being around them. I feel you have every right for feeling hurt and betrayed by thier actions. The best thing I can ... (read in full...)

Did he just lose interest?

Q.   I met a guy two weeks ago. Our first date went on for 5 hours, the second for more than 10, the third date we went for a drive and hung out, and the fourth we had dinner at his place and watched movies. We gradually got closer physically and the ...

A.   1 May 2009: I totally agree with Syfer Fire on this.... (read in full...)

Our sex life is terrible and to make things worse my ex who I had a very passionate sex life with is back on the scene!

Q.   My husband is a wonderful, temperate, caring husband and father. He is such a great friend and I trust him completely, however, he hates and fears intimacy, sex and passionate kissing. We also have some problems in the communication department as ...

A.   1 May 2009: I might be the only one to say this but leave your hubby. As a guy I can tell you we don't change. Plus it sounds like he has really sexual issues that run kinda deep, if the thought of touching your lady bits disgust him. As for your Ex don't hook ... (read in full...)

My first ever crush hates me

Q.   Hi, I'm 15 and in need of help. I've liked this girl for over a year, she was the first girl I ever crushed on this hard. And I found out by signs and her best friend that she hates me. She actually is rather mean to me. I'm trying to get over her...

A.   30 April 2009: Okay I'm gonna say this in a mean way stop being emo and get the hell over her{ for any emo kids feelings I just hurt sorry but it's guys like him that give you kids a bad name.} Look you want to get over her then just think about all the crap she ... (read in full...)

My bf says he doesn't get jealous--almost ever.

Q.   Heyo! My bf says he doesn't get jealous--almost ever. Is that possible? I know I get jealous pretty easily, so what he said is pretty much incomprehensible to me. Thanks! -GG...

A.   30 April 2009: I'm calling bull crap on him right now as a guy with working man bits I can safely tell you he's lying out his arse, and if he really isn't jealous then he really. We guys show feeling more then women think we may not say it with words we show with ... (read in full...)

What am I doing??

Q.   Okay so long story short i cheated on my Boyfriend of 6 years for a year and a half with the same person no he was not the other guy just a "buddy" if you get me ... the truth about me and him only came out because i got pregnant with his baby now ...

A.   30 April 2009: Plan and simple no if you don't love him then don't go back to him. In the long run you'll only hurt him and yourself if you do.... (read in full...)

Why is my ex doing this to me?

Q.   Why is my ex doing this to me, he has a new gf, and we still get on really well as friends, the thing is he keeps going on about how i want 2 suck his cock,and then he says hes teasing me but then he said it may happen or it may not, I no i wo...

A.   30 April 2009: First off stand up for yourself no one and I mean no one should even joke about pimping you out like that.This guy looks at you as nothing more then a tool someone weaker then himself that he can use.... (read in full...)

Help, what to do... I fancy my sister!

Q.   hey, i had a question, in the back of my head there's a voice telling me this is wrong, but at the same time i feel like it's not so wrong, my sister is only about a year younger then me, most guys her age think shes attractive and she's petite. i ...

A.   30 April 2009: Let me start by just saying wow...Okay now all feeling a side what you want to do with your little sister is illegal in most parts of the world. plus you're are somewhere in the age group of 13-15 putting her at 12-14 years of age first of in the ... (read in full...)

Is he cheating? please let me know what you think?

Q.   Is he cheating? pls tell me what you think..thanks..? Hey guys..I need an objective opinion asap. I have been going out for a guy for 10 months. For the last 2-3 months we were on and off and every time we had a fight he would dump on me. I gu...

A.   30 April 2009: First off calm down alittle you may never know if he did or didn't have sex with that other woman. But you should think about what he means to you as a person. If you truly have strong feeling for him then give him a call telling him you're sorry ... (read in full...)

Best friend love, or something more?

Q.   I have a female best friend she means the world to me. She the only person that can make me feel ashamed of the things I do. When I'm away from her I hurt in side and miss her so m uch I know I love her to a point but i like to think of it as a big ...

A.   30 April 2009: Thank you both for your thoughts.... (read in full...)

I'm falling for my FWB; how should I let him know?

Q.   I am unsure on how to approach my fwb about making our relationship more committed. We have been seeing each other for almost a year now and things are great but he says he does not want a gf. We spend so much time together and always have fun. We ...

A.   30 April 2009: First thing you should ask yourself is are you happy with the way things are right now. If the answer is no the by all means move forward with guy are try to. As a guy I can tell you that right now you are on a slippery slope with this one.If you ... (read in full...)

Did he just lose interest?

Q.   I met a guy two weeks ago. Our first date went on for 5 hours, the second for more than 10, the third date we went for a drive and hung out, and the fourth we had dinner at his place and watched movies. We gradually got closer physically and the ...

A.   30 April 2009: It may have been that he just want to sleep with you but I don't think that's it and trust me I'm a guy and I can tell you for a fact that if he didn't try anything by the third date he really wasn't after your lady bits.I think you should try ... (read in full...)

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