A
male
age
,
anonymous
writes:My 22 yr old son was in a car accident a year ago and his 19 yr old girlfriend died. I understand that it was hard for him but I am really wooried about him. He hasnt moved on at all. In one full year he has not lef tthe house unless he was forced. He was been in counceling twice a week for the past 10 months but it doesnt seem to be working.His friends cannt get him to go out not even just to play basketball which was his life before. How can I help him move on?
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female
reader, freebird  +, writes (10 May 2009):
 Do you want to ask him to try dynamic mediataion. Its a great form of release from pent up emotions. Heres a demo. It was developed by Osho. I found it very useful after a break up from my boyfriend. You might have to buy the DVD . see this linkhttp://video.google.com/ and search for: dynamic meditation osho
A
female
reader, missmissy34  +, writes (10 May 2009):
Hi I understand what ur sons goin through been there myself. I was married he was my best friend and he was killed in a auto accident 40 days later. It was tramatic for me hardest thing I'd ever went through. Its been five yrs and it took me couple yrs to start really coping and trying to let go. Just let him know u love him and it will get easier. Not a day goes by I dnt think of my husband it never goes away just gets easier. Just be there it will be ok
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A
female
reader, kellyxxx  +, writes (8 May 2009):
 Keep an eye on him but don't push him to do anything. If my boyfriend died then I would be in the same state and I wouldjust want time to heal. Don't be so harsh trying to help him, he doesn't need your help!
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A
female
reader, keepitreal03  +, writes (8 May 2009):
I think a year is not that long. I think he should take his time and the fact that everyone keeps asking him to get out might make him hold back and maybe feel bad that he's moving on.just give him another year I'm sure he will at least go play ball. Its just hard to move on to the next and have fun when that's on his mind. Maybe it would help if he could talk with someone who has lost there love and moved on. That will be the best thing that way he can see its ok and she won't be mad at him for it because I feel he feels like he's cheating when he thinks he should be greeving
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A
male
reader, malum424 +, writes (8 May 2009):
 Well other then letting him know you care about him there really isn't much more you can do for him but what every you do, do not force him to move on to fast I know a year may seem like along time to you but he was the one in the car with her not you and on top of that she was someone he cared about. Everyone deals with lose differently. try aking him about her let him know that you're willing to share his pain and what losing her ment to him.
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female
reader, steph449 +, writes (8 May 2009):
you cant, he has to do it by himself you can only be supportive and watch him closely, my best friend died 23 years ago and her husband of six months just took time to grieve he went through many processes at times was just 'pulling' women and being an arse basically but he eventually got through it and settled down and i just supported him at all times he has got a lovely family now, my cousin died one week after giving birth and her husband has never tried to cope with it just replaced her with a clone and is pretending it never happened so at least your son is grieving which is part of the process that has to be gone through
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female
reader, niki20 +, writes (8 May 2009):
 just give it time. it might even yake over a year. do you think he might feel responsible for her death? i think that if you just give him time to cope and grieve, hell get over it on his own time, thats the best healer, time. good luck and best wishes to all.
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