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... Send *ildeesbg a private message | | | *ildeesbg's profile:Hi Readers
My name is Danielle and I am 25 years old. I have graduated from college with a BA in psychology and am currently in graduate school for my Masters in mental health counseling. Overall,
I am extremely down to earth and I love to have a good time enjoying the positive things in life.
My approach to responding to peoples questions is to help them see something their overlooking. In order to do so I might ask them questions that they would have to be truthful answering. Most people deep down know the right thing to do or say but their scared to be honest with themselves because fear or letting go of someone or realizing something isnt right can be scary. If we are truthful with ourselves then a positive change can occur.
I believe that communication is extremely important. That is why many of my responses suggest people to talk with the person or persons their having issues with. If you speak about your problems then you can have a more indepth sense of what the other person is feeling. I always suggest that communication comes first before any action is taken.
Overall, I feel this site is wonderful because people can get different aspects of their situation.
Feel free to contact me anytime =)just bare with me because sometimes it takes a little while for me to respond due to school work |
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| Latest articles: Fear Of The Unknown
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
27 October 2007: "You never realize what you have until its gone" Such a powerful quote, for people who have experienced this type of loss. Think about it, having something so good that you cant even appreciate it until its no longer there. Dont you think that is ...
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Sex. Should we do it drunk or sober?
Q. When me and my partner are drunk she wants to act sexually, but I would prefer to do so being sober. What's your opinion?...
A. 13 September 2005: Alchol and drugs can make a person more sexual. It makes them lose their ambitions. Now,how long have you and your partner dated? If this is a new relationship then having drunk sex isnt a good sign. If she can only be sexual if she has been ... (read in full...)
My fiance cheated on me... with my 17-year-old sister!
Q. I broke up with my fiance about 5 months ago, because I found that he cheated me with my sister. She is only 17!! Six months ago, My fiance and I met my sister by chance. And then I found that he often lied to me,the same as my sister . And ...
A. 12 September 2005: This is hard. I cant imagine how hard it is for you. Nothing hurts more than betrayal from people you love. What I can tell you is that, your heart needs to heal. It is going to take some time for you to start to open up again and trust. This is ... (read in full...)
We swapped phone numbers and email, but does that mean he's interested in me?
Q. Hey I‘m 15, and I met someone a couple of nights back at my friends social event. We hit it off right away and were chatting all night. He even gave me a miniature of his recent school photo. At the end of the night we traded phone numbers and email ...
A. 12 September 2005: It sounds like to me you have self-esteem problems. If you acted like yourself then way to go !! You need to be comfortable with yourself before you start any type of relationship, especially a romantic one. If I am right and you do have alittle ... (read in full...)
I love both my girlfriend - and her best friend...
Q. I'm am attracted to my girlfriend's best friend. We have been going out for 3 years. I love my girlfriend yet I still feel so attracted to her best friend, we seem to get along so well and we are both attracted to each other sexually. What can I do...
A. 12 September 2005: Do you LOVE your girlfriends best friend? or do you LUST your girlfriends best friend?
Sometimes, when your in a relationship for a long time, everyone around you looks dateable. That is because you want something new. Totally, understa... (read in full...)
My boyfriend lied about being divorced. Now he's telling the truth, but do I trust him?
Q. My boyfriend lied to me and told me he had broken up with his wife, but apparently it wasn't so. He had been ignoring me in the last few months so I did the same. Now he wants me back and says he has formally divorced his wife. I confirmed this with ...
A. 12 September 2005: Before you go and roll out the welcome wagon, you need to talk with your man. Explain that the lying is unexceptable and you will not tolerate another lie. Find out why he lied in the first place. Be assertive with this, he needs to know you mean ... (read in full...)
Mum doesn't recognise that I'm old enough to be alone with a boy!
Q. I'm 14. I feel im mature enough to be alone with a guy. My Mom never listens to me and just always tells me to leave her alone. I've tried to talk to her, but she just won't listen! She thinks I'm immature, irresponsible, and too young to be alone ...
A. 12 September 2005: Being 14 especially during this day and age is hard. Your mom has issues with you being alone with your boyfriend because she is scared that you two might "experiment" in sexual acts. Also the thought of a 14 yr old being alone with a guy just ... (read in full...)
I want my ex back, but he'll never take me back if he finds out I've lost my virginity to someone else!
Q. Ok I have a huge problem! I am 19 years old, currently dating a 31 year old for the past 3 months. Everything is great and he's so much fun and I like him a lot. I lost my virginity to him and he's such a sweet guy, treats me very kindly. The only...
A. 12 September 2005: Honesty goes along way. With that said I think you should tell your ex-boyfriend the truth. You too were on a break because you wanted to date other people. Sometimes when you meet other people, sex gets involved. By telling him the truth your ... (read in full...)
We seemed to have a good time together. Why no reply to my text?
Q. I have met a great guy, we ended up spending the night together but didn't have sex. I told him I wasn't into one night stands. He said that was fine and he appreciated my honesty. I took his phone number - he didn't take mine. I asked if we would...
A. 12 September 2005: Honestly, sounds to me that he was in it for S.E.X. I know that sucks, since you kind of fell for him, but at least you didnt give it up to a man that would probably just call you for booty. However, as a women who has been in similar situations I ... (read in full...)
He didn't return my calls. He spent Monday with his ex. Are we finished?
Q. Should I leave my boyfriend? On Friday last week, my boyfriend promised that we would spend some time together as we have both been busy. On Saturday he turns up and tells me that he can't stay as he has promised his dad that he will help him out ...
A. 10 September 2005: Honestly, it sounds to me he is confused about things. As a girlfriend it is hard to face what is right infront of you. He is haninging out with his ex-girlfriend at 7 am? What is that about? Listen I have a boyfriend and I have an ex. I am not ... (read in full...)
He obsessed with me, but I don't feel the same about him anymore!
Q. Hey I'm 23, F, and I have been with my bf for 2 years now and he's become very obsessed with me. My picture's everywhere, won't leave me alone. I have had enough. I don't feel the same for him but I don't know how to break up with him because I'm ...
A. 10 September 2005: First things first, this is your life and you need to be happy. If you fell out of love with him, then you need to move on. Now here comes the tricky part, obviously he loves you. But here are my questions. Has he ever said he would kill himself ... (read in full...)
So, we're friends, but how do I know if she likes me in the same way?
Q. I'm a 16 year old male in year 11 at school. There's a really good looking girl who I think I'm good friends with and I really like her. She's really talkative to me and laughs at some of the jokes and stuff, but how do I know if she likes me in the ...
A. 10 September 2005: There is a possibility that she likes you and there is a possiblity she likes you only as a friend. I would hold off on asking her out right now not because she would say no, but because it might effect the friendship. Give it time, wait for more ... (read in full...)
I love him and he loves me, so why won't he show any affection to me?
Q. Okay my boyfriend and I have been talking about getting engaged and what not. I love him with all I have. I have never been so in love with anything or anyone. But here is my problem...I feel that he sees me as more of a friend and not a girlfriend. ...
A. 10 September 2005: Here is my input. There are men out there who just arent comfortable showing emotions, for whatever the reasons. Doesnt necessarily mean he thinks of you as a friend. If he isnt affectionate then how do you know he loves you? I am sure that he ... (read in full...)
Should I write and apologise to my ex about the bad way I handled our break-up?
Q. I found some old letters in my stack of books and in them was one from "Jake". We dated 8 years ago when I was 18 for about 3-4 months. He was amazing to me, maybe the nicest bfriend I ever had. We were never intimate with one another, although ...
A. 9 September 2005: I say go for it, it is closure for you. I tell all my friends the same thing, be open and honest so you have no regrets. I think that as long as you state that your happily married and that this letter is closure for yourself and something that he ... (read in full...)
How can I be friends again with my ex?
Q. Dear Cupid, I need some advice. I want to be friends again with my ex because we had such good times together and I didn't want our relationship to end on bad terms but it did. I want to make things right again but I don't know how. Could you help...
A. 9 September 2005: Breaking up is hard and honestly depending on what happened,how serious was the relationship,how long it has been, and who ended it with who are all important factors. Being friends right away is awkward, your still sorting out in your mind ... (read in full...)
I discovered that my boyfriend is a cross-dresser. Now he lies to me about it!
Q. Hi, I’m really confused at the moment and was hoping someone could help me out. I’m in a relationship and have been for about 1 year and 2 months. It was great to start off with but now things are a little shaky. He has two kids (just turned 2 ...
A. 9 September 2005: I am going to try to be as helpful as i could. This is a big problem for you and it is understandable. The first thing you need to do is STOP blaming yourself. You did not put ladies clothes on him and tell him to lie about it.
As i said bef... (read in full...)
She wasn't able to handle a relationship with school and work. OK, but how long do I wait for her?
Q. My girlfriend who I've been going out with for about half a year just dumped me. She says it's just because right now her schedule between school and work is just too overloaded and that she doesn't have time for a serious relationship. She also ...
A. 9 September 2005: here is my opinion.. she is just not that into you. here is why. When someone is in a relationship their happy about and potentially loves the person, nothing will get in the way of that. I mean lets face it true love is hard to find. Also when ... (read in full...)
I'm terrible at oral sex, but I want to get better at it!
Q. I can't seem to get comfortable with giving oral sex to my partner. Actually it has happened with the only two sexual partners I've been with. I can't seem to pleasure them. I'm uncomfortable because I'm inexperienced and when I do try, I'm ...
A. 9 September 2005: Because your getting so nervous and uptight about the situation it is causing you to get well..stage fight. Sex and even oral sex is something not to get so over worked about. The first thing i can tell you is relax. Next if you really want to ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend loves the attention from other women! Will he every stop the games?
Q. I am really hoping I can get some advice from a few different people here. My partner and I have been together for 8 months now. We love each other very much and have a great relationship overall. We live together and plan on moving closer to ...
A. 9 September 2005: Sometimes having attention from the opposite sex feels great. Sometimes what happens is that you like the attention so much you dont want it to stop, so you express some flirtation, you might give a round about answer rather then getting to the ... (read in full...)
I started to go down on him and he said "Don't bother"...
Q. I just started dating this guy. We fooled around for the first time the other night and when I went down to return the favor he told me not to bother because he's only gotten off twice like that with his ex-girlfriend. I hesitated to ask if he's ...
A. 9 September 2005: As of right now i wouldnt take it to heart. It sounds to me that he is being honest with what he said. If you two get more serious then I would advise you to ask him about it. If things get even more serious then when you guys are alone and about ... (read in full...)
How can I be sure that this relationship will make it in the long term?
Q. Hi, I have been living with my partner N for three years. He is 24, I am 25. We both love each other very much, but since the beginning of our relationship I have been getting bouts of doubt about our future together. It happens every couple of ...
A. 9 September 2005: Been there ! You guys have been together for a long time and honestly having doubts is common and normal. The reason you have these doubts is because you have been with this person so long you start to wonder...is their anyone else out there?? Is ... (read in full...)
I'm disturbed by my new boyfriend's daughter who just won't stop flashing!
Q. My new boyfriend has a 24year old daughter, who keeps flashing him. He tells me when she does and finds it hilarious, but I find it a bit disturbing. Once she called him into her bedroom and when he entered she was bent over butt naked! Another time ...
A. 9 September 2005: tough situation. Here is the thing..I was raised by two great parents and i too like to get a rise out of them, i would be gross like pick my nose or pass gas, honestly thats as far as I would take it. I think what she is doing is probably trying ... (read in full...)
As soon as I told him about my feelings, he stopped talking to me!
Q. Me and this boy have been talking and as we were talking I started falling in love with him... Now this has been going on for 2-3 months and I finally told him. Now he doesnt want to talk to me anymore. What do I do?...
A. 9 September 2005: First off good for you that you were comfortable enough with yourself and the siutation to lay the cards out on the table. Even as women there are times we have to take control of the situation, (dont we ever get a break??) Anyways it seems like he ... (read in full...)
I caught my 10-year-old daughter masturbating!
Q. I hope you can help me with this because i just dont know what to do! I have a 10 year old daughter who is very happy- go lucky and has lots of friends. Last week i walked into her bedroom to find her straddling her bedcorner and thrusting. I told ...
A. 9 September 2005: It is normal for both male and female to start showing their sexual side at this age. Kids can get knowledge of what is out there through T.V, or have friends in school who talk about it. As a women discussing a little girl I am sure she played ... (read in full...)
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