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*obbyjo agony aunt

*obbyjo

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Hi im Bobbyjo, Im 29 years old from South England. I work full time for government but have just finshed a counselling course at college.

Ive had alot of experience with helping my friends with breakups, my familys divorce, my friends sexual hang-ups and also my own problems. And Ive had more than my fair share of that!

Im currently single living with my 2 friends (who are also single) and havent had a relationship for over a year now and am very happy just the way things are.

123Next > [3 pages, 85 answers]

Dogs versus the Christmas with family? I'm so angry right now, what do I do? I'm 32.

Q.   I'm so annoyed right now. I've invited my parents to my house for Christmas but they've declined because I won't allow them to bring their dogs. They have 3 huge dogs and I don't want them in my house. I cannot believe they would rather sit alon...

A.   12 December 2016: My parents love 10 mins drive away from me. The reason I say 2 hours at my house for dinner is to make it as short as possible for them to be away from their dogs, not because I only want them round for 2 hours. The reason I don't want the dogs in ... (read in full...)

Dogs versus the Christmas with family? I'm so angry right now, what do I do? I'm 32.

Q.   I'm so annoyed right now. I've invited my parents to my house for Christmas but they've declined because I won't allow them to bring their dogs. They have 3 huge dogs and I don't want them in my house. I cannot believe they would rather sit alon...

A.   12 December 2016: My parents love 10 mins drive away from me. The reason I say 2 hours at my house for dinner is to make it as short as possible for them to be away from their dogs, not because I only want them round for 2 hours. The reason I don't want the dogs in ... (read in full...)

Dogs versus the Christmas with family? I'm so angry right now, what do I do? I'm 32.

Q.   I'm so annoyed right now. I've invited my parents to my house for Christmas but they've declined because I won't allow them to bring their dogs. They have 3 huge dogs and I don't want them in my house. I cannot believe they would rather sit alon...

A.   12 December 2016: My parents love 10 mins drive away from me. The reason I say 2 hours at my house for dinner is to make it as short as possible for them to be away from their dogs, not because I only want them round for 2 hours. The reason I don't want the dogs in ... (read in full...)

Dogs versus the Christmas with family? I'm so angry right now, what do I do? I'm 32.

Q.   I'm so annoyed right now. I've invited my parents to my house for Christmas but they've declined because I won't allow them to bring their dogs. They have 3 huge dogs and I don't want them in my house. I cannot believe they would rather sit alon...

A.   12 December 2016: No they never go away on holiday they stay in this country in this camper van and of course the dogs go with them. It's not just me, they do it to both my sisters and their children as well. If they're ever invited out anywhere they will go for an ... (read in full...)

Dogs versus the Christmas with family? I'm so angry right now, what do I do? I'm 32.

Q.   I'm so annoyed right now. I've invited my parents to my house for Christmas but they've declined because I won't allow them to bring their dogs. They have 3 huge dogs and I don't want them in my house. I cannot believe they would rather sit alon...

A.   12 December 2016: No they never go away on holiday they stay in this country in this camper van and of course the dogs go with them. It's not just me, they do it to both my sisters and their children as well. If they're ever invited out anywhere they will go for an ... (read in full...)

Boyfriend of 3 years ended things, 2 weeks later he's in a new relationship and I'm still hurting

Q.   I am 32 years old and about 3 months ago my ex of 3 years left me stating he did not love me anymore. To add to my devastation, he started a new relationship just 2 weeks later. At first I was beside myself but am slowly learning to accept their ...

A.   16 July 2015: Hey guys thanks for your advice it's really helped me today. I just wanna say though that 99% sure that he wasn't with Her when he was with me. We split up but for the first 2 weeks we had good contact and he considered getting back with me. Then... (read in full...)

I was stood up - was it necessary?

Q.   Hi everyone! I recently met a guy online and we'd been chatting for awhile. He seemed genuine and asked me to meet up with him on Sunday (last weekend). He took my number and said he'd be in touch. We arranged to meet in my town and I messaged h...

A.   15 June 2014: No its not normal, its rude and its disrespectful. Unless he came up with a damn good excuse as to why he didnt reply and meet you, then I would totally brush him off and not even think about him again, let alone give him the time of day. ... (read in full...)

Do I keep blocking him or unblock him? I think how I've moved on is the best revenge?

Q.   I had a few posts here and got really good advice. My ex dumped me nearly a year ago. We talked a few times. I initiated contact most of the times. I couldn't let go and get over him because we planned to get married before we broke up and he's my ...

A.   18 February 2014: Im going through the same thing at the moment. I really want an ex to regret finishing with me. I keep blocking and unblocking him. I think the best form of revenge is success and by what you have written it already looks like you are set for some ... (read in full...)

I can't deal with the poop streaks he leaves on the bed!

Q.   This is a gross question but I really need advice. Sorry to be graphic. Basically Ive been seeing this guy for 3 months and on 3 occasions when he has stayed over at mine he has left poop streaks in my bed. He did it lastnight and I felt sick. He is ...

A.   18 January 2014: Hey thanks for your replies. I can assure you that this is definitely a legit question. I have to say though that it's not everyday that I don't have toilet roll just a couple of times I have ran out. I've decided to finish with him especially as I ... (read in full...)

I get depressed going out and seeing children that I'll never have so now I don't want to go out!

Q.   I am late thirties. Whenever I go to a mall or wherever and see couples and families with children out together I get this tight sensation in my chest and I feel rock bottom sad that it didn't happen for me, as I never married or had children. I ...

A.   29 July 2012: You are definitely not too old to have a child. My sister has just had a baby and she is 41. So dont worry about that. But I would think about either having another talk with your partner, explain to him how you feel and how much you would like a ... (read in full...)

I fear my vagina isnt good enough for my boyfriend

Q.   So, my boyfriend and I have sexual relations. He isnt my first, and well I feel ashamed to have sex with him for that reason... We were watching this t.v show, with Wesley Snipes(black guy) and he was married to an Asian woman, they showed a scene ...

A.   18 May 2012: doesnt your 'boyfriend' realise nothing in life is like it is in the movies jeeeez if sex was like it is in the movies I would be doing it all the time. ... (read in full...)

We spent a lovely couple of hours together I got hooked and then he never contacted me again

Q.   Dear Agony aunt. On a night out a couple of months back, I met a boy who I fell for literally from the moment I saw him (as cheesy as it sounds). We hit it off straight away and he wouldn’t leave my side for the rest of the night. He mentioned tha...

A.   9 May 2012: The fact that he only split with his ex the day before should have had alarm bells ringing in your head from the get go. Seems to me he was looking for an ego boost, possibly hoping that when he went back to your friends house with you the kissing ... (read in full...)

I'm getting turned on by much younger painter. Am I gay? I was married!

Q.   Hello, i'm a 42 year old male and something has happened that has confused me and even shocked me a little. Ok, a bit of background... A couple of weeks ago, during the unseasonal fine weather we had in the UK i employed a young lad (18) to do some ...

A.   12 April 2012: step away and ask yourself if this is definitely what you want. Dont read too much into things like 'he was hanging round when he didnt need to' etc. Chances are he was probably wanting you to offer him more work. To come onto him now, without ... (read in full...)

I know leaving him is a good idea but the thought of being alone scares me

Q.   My boyfriend and I have been together for a total of three years. He has cheated, I only know of about 6 girls but I don't know how many times or who else, one of which was one of my closest friends so I cannot trust him around my friends. He has ...

A.   18 March 2012: you are so, so young you probably dont think you are as nobody does when they are in their late teens/early twenties but you are. You have your whole life ahead of you please ditch this total waste of space and find someone who treats you like a ... (read in full...)

Boyfriend wont spend mothers day with me - am I overreacting?

Q.   This time last year my grandmother died and it is mothers day weekend as everyone knows and my mum is working all day today and tomorrow. My boyfriend knows how upset i am, i was crying yesterday because I am just feeling quite lonely. At Christmas ...

A.   17 March 2012: I have to agree with the top poster you do seem to have some sort of issues that need to be sorted. Im not sure if you are aware but you come across as really childish in your post. Its like your feeling sorry for yourself and just want the aunts ... (read in full...)

Thirty, single, no prospects, frequents hookers.

Q.   Hi, i have recently turned thirty, only to realise that i am growing old with no experience with women and dating game. i just feel shallow, empty and detached. i have been away from home when i was 15 and have lived for the last 15 years on my own. ...

A.   17 March 2012: You have cripplingly low self esteem. You need to speak to a professional counsellor as to why you feel this way as your problem may be a deep rooted one. ... (read in full...)

Does the fact that I feel nothing for him now mean I never loved him?

Q.   Why do I feel the way I do? Is this normal? I loved my ex boyfriend so much but he cheated, lied to me and dumped me. I was so hurt, I was crazy about him and now I've lost interest in dating and love altogether. He wanted us to s...

A.   17 January 2012: No. It means that you loved him so much, and gave him so much of your time and energy, that you literally couldnt take anymore. Its your heart's way of saying Im through with this, I need a break and to move on. I know this because I was the same... (read in full...)

I'm 27 and never had a girlfriend

Q.   hi everyone. im a 27 year old guy, moved to a new area which is 200 miles away fron where i am orginally for a new job. and its really nice here. i like my job and the people i work with, its really good money and ive started playing rugby again so...

A.   23 November 2011: Hey Dont turn into a jerk just cos some women like men that way. The world is full of them as it is. Dont change for anyone. You sound like youre happy with your life so just keep doing what you are doing. Love will come to you when you least ex... (read in full...)

My bf is in the army and I miss him so much. Do army relationships work?

Q.   My boyfriend is in the army, i miss him loads, dont know what to do. I've been with my boyfriend for nearly two months and he is in the army, i barely see him, only every other weekend, he told me he loves me already i'm not sure to believe this as ...

A.   15 August 2011: i cant tell you how happy i am to have found this post. I am in love with a guy whos in the army and Ive never felt so confused, frustrated and even desperate over anyone in my life. Hes based on the opposite side of the country to me. We met at new ... (read in full...)

Is he finally realising what he lost or is the jealous dog coming out?

Q.   Its been three months since we broke up, maybe more, which is a good sign since i stopped counting the days. I feel im at that point where, yes im thinking about them still, but they aren't my only thought. So i began to move on, i have been gettin...

A.   29 July 2011: Hey hun, well speaking from experience I think hes playing the 'I dont want you but I dont want anyone else to have you' card Im afraid. Im going through a similar situation, an ex who I wanted back so bad didnt want to know. Then something happened ... (read in full...)

Is he finally realising what he lost or is the jealous dog coming out?

Q.   Its been three months since we broke up, maybe more, which is a good sign since i stopped counting the days. I feel im at that point where, yes im thinking about them still, but they aren't my only thought. So i began to move on, i have been gettin...

A.   29 July 2011: Hey hun, well speaking from experience I think hes playing the 'I dont want you but I dont want anyone else to have you' card Im afraid. Im going through a similar situation, an ex who ... (read in full...)

He is ignoring me...what should I do?

Q.   I really need some advice on what to do..my so called bf has been totally ignoring me he hasnt taken any of my calls for 5 days now i leave him emails and instant messages but nothing i had written a letter to him like 4 days ago reguarding our ...

A.   27 July 2011: wow....this is an old post but I thought I would get my 2 pence in anyway! Well, im being ignored too. And it is the most frustrating, heartbreaking time ever. 2 weeks ago I was his girlfriend. I had met his family. We were happy. Now Im alone, he ... (read in full...)

My fiance's butt stinks....how do I tell him?

Q.   I have been dating my fiance for four years now. And theres this small little issue that KILLS me, and grosses me out and i dont know how to tell him without it hurting his feelings. I'm really embarassed to talk about this, but...something needs to ...

A.   26 July 2011: you're just going to have to bite the bullet, look him in the eye and tell him straight that he smells. Like you said, youve done everything else. Theres not alot more you can do. ... (read in full...)

I miss my friend and I want her back in my lfe

Q.   I miss my best friend. Last summer she met a new girlfriend who is very possessive - she doesn't like my friend spending time with me on her own and when I see the two of them, I am ignored all the time. I was in a car accident before Christmas - ...

A.   10 April 2011: To be totally honest with you, it sounds like you are better off without her. You dont miss HER, you miss having a friend. Now, youve said that people ignore you because you are shy. Well then its time to start being confident. And if you cant act ... (read in full...)

I'm fed up of feeling sorry for myself, but cant seem to forget about him! Help!

Q.   This isn't a question. I am just going through a difficult patch and was wondering if anyone had any advice. I fell in love with a guy towards the end of last year (October/November time). He made it very clear that he didn't want anything se...

A.   28 February 2011: I am in kinda the same situation, where I cant forget a guy I cant have, for reasons different to yours but still hard to deal with. He lives and works miles away from me. I met him when he was working in my hometown for 2 months. We started a ... (read in full...)

Hurt and confused, was it all my fault?

Q.   Today makes a week since I last spoke with my ex and I am really taking everything hard. I feel like I'm the only one hurting, like I'm the only one who cares as he is just moving on with his life happily. Long story short, we met through mutual ...

A.   28 February 2011: I dont feel like its your fault at all. It wasnt fair that he he would not face the issues that arose head on, and preferred to avoid them. Every relationship has its ups and downs, and from what youve said that he moves on to the next girl when ... (read in full...)

I feel totally played by him! How could he do this to me?

Q.   ok my main reason for posting this is i am very confused. my now ex partner and myself have known each other for 10 years now, we lost contact for a few years and ended up catchin up on a social network site were we continued to speak on a regular ...

A.   19 September 2010: Im not totally sure if he played you.....however I dont think you can trust him seeing that hes still in touch with his ex. I think you would be much better off without him to be honest. ... (read in full...)

I feel I'm stagnating and I don't know what to do...

Q.   Hi guys, I'm fed up. I'm 22, I graduated from university last summer, struggled to get a job. I am now working, I love the work, but the hours and money are terrible. I work harder than most people in the office, but I'm paid the least. I can't ...

A.   18 September 2010: Give yourself a break!!! Your still young, youre educated. You may be in a job youre not happy with at the moment but treat it as a stepping stone to something better, a learning curve. You could always take a gap year and go travelling. You say ... (read in full...)

Met this guy at a pub, has he lost interest?

Q.   I am a bit confused by this guy. I see him around my local pubs quite a bit and he always had lots of girls around him. I thought he was a bit of a jerk. I had a feeling he had a thing for me because he would always stare at me and look at me when ...

A.   20 October 2009: What did you text him when you were drunk? I know from past experience that some men dont like drunken texts. Also, he comes across as a bit of a player and very confident. You say he has lots of attention from other girls. It seems to me that he ... (read in full...)

Should I make the most of our FWB, or ask him to move out?

Q.   Hello, I don't know what I should do. I am house sharing (my house) with a much younger male friend, who I have fallen in love with. I have told him, and he says he loves me as a friend but that's all. In some ways I can be content to live like ...

A.   7 February 2009: are u sleeping with him? If he is engaging in sexual relationship with you then he taking advantage of you and this should stop. If you and him have not even as much as kissed, then Im afraid this is only your problem as he has done nothing wrong. ... (read in full...)

Why does our country (UK) come to a standstill when it snows when other countries manage to keep going with transport etc?

Q.   Why can't the UK get it's self together and provide snow ploughs and more gritting lorries when it snows, instead of just giving a weather warning out and having drivers crash? Why does the country have to come to a standstill? They want us to use ...

A.   3 February 2009: I have no idea how this question managed to get through the moderators. What on earth has this got to do with love or relationships? Why dont u just google this question? What a waste of effort and answers. ... (read in full...)

Broken hearted and can't seem to mend

Q.   the story is....i was with my ex for 7months, i was and still am head over heels for him, we are still good friends and i get on with the family really well. i was fine with the fact that we arnt togeather anymore, but a new girl has come on the ...

A.   2 February 2009: You were only fine with fact you werent together anymore because subconciously you believed you would get back together. Now some new girl is on the scene you feel that your chance of getting back with him has gone. Its such a cliche but its so true ... (read in full...)

Ex back on the scene... does he want me back?

Q.   I am so upset at the moment and have been for the past month after my ex-boyfriend came back into my life. He ended things 6 months ago, and after much effort on my part to make things work, I finally gave up and moved on. I met someone else and ...

A.   14 December 2008: Im gonna be brutally honest with you now hun, but dont build your hopes up on this one. I was in the same sort of position as you back in the summer. My ex came back on the scene after he dumped me 3 years ago for another girl. It took me months to ... (read in full...)

He laughed and called me his "fuck buddy!"

Q.   Hi People I'm finding this really hard, I've been split with my bf just over a month, and I'm still in contact as in friends and I still sometimes sleep with him in the car, Well last nite I went round his house for the first time since we sp...

A.   29 November 2008: Hey, I went trhough the same thing with my ex. He split with me for someone else, but it didnt work out so he started sleeping with me again, me hoping that he would get back with me allowed him to use me, but he never did come back so I have now ... (read in full...)

He's a liar and cheater and I want to warn his pregnant girlfriend.

Q.   I was with this guy for 8 months and have still been seeing him on and off from when we split up 5 months ago until recently when I decided I definitely wanted nothing more to do with him because he constantly lied and cheated on me. I've just...

A.   15 November 2008: hun, I completely undestand how frustrating this is for you. I was sort of in the same position as you last week. I wanted to tell my ex's new girlfriend how he treated me - basically cheated and lied to me. I hated seeing them so happy when he had ... (read in full...)

A few days after we split up I saw him with another girl. I feel really hurt.

Q.   Me and my boyfriend have been on and off for the last few weeks, We split up again on saturday and met up on the monday night, he then told me he didnt want a relationship anymore and wanted to be single. feeling hurt by this I went out with my ...

A.   3 November 2008: You are going through one thing I believe to be one of the most painful things we have to experience in life. Its bad enough being rejected by someone we love, and then seeing them with someone else is heartbreaking. I know exactly how you feel hun, ... (read in full...)

Is there any way of telling when you are truly in love?

Q.   Hey This is just a quick question but it is one i have been wondering about for quite a while now. Is there anyway of telling when you are truly in love ? Thanks x...

A.   21 October 2008: Hmmm....for me the only way I knew I was truly in love was when he finished with me. It killed me. ... (read in full...)

What does he mean by 'you reap what you sow'

Q.   Hi my problem is with my dad he has lost his job again just like he did when he worked down the mines. Yet this time mum says he seems happier, he keeps saying to folks you 'reap what you sow'. What does he mean....

A.   15 October 2008: Reap what you sow has always meant to me "you get what you give". So if I give %100 effort in something I would expect to get good results, but it can be said with anything, like eyeswideopen says above, love, pain, happineess etc. ... (read in full...)

I hate the fact he is in love with this probably normal and perfect girl and his so happy...how can I deal with this??

Q.   Hello all. Ok, I have known this wonderful (I thought he was at the time) Highly intelligent and musically gifted man for 10 years, we met, we had sparks and I would see him on and off with our mutual friends. I knew the first time I saw him h...

A.   11 October 2008: Its gonna take time for you to get over this. What he done to you was very cruel and deceiving, he built your hopes up and lead you on...only for you to find that the plans he promised you he was already doing with some other girl. And worst of all ... (read in full...)

I need advice on whether I should make one last attempt to have a relationship with my ex, or just try to let him go

Q.   I need advice on whether I should make one last attempt to have a relationship with my ex, or just try to let him go. Reasons for trying: I'm head over heels in love with him. He's a wonderful guy, and I'm crazy about him. It's not just that I ...

A.   5 October 2008: Okay....what Im about to answer might not be what you want to hear.... After finding myself in the same situation as you, Ive just finished reading a book "he's just not that into you" and the one thing that was stated, which I believe is true eve... (read in full...)

I need advice on whether I should make one last attempt to have a relationship with my ex, or just try to let him go

Q.   I need advice on whether I should make one last attempt to have a relationship with my ex, or just try to let him go. Reasons for trying: I'm head over heels in love with him. He's a wonderful guy, and I'm crazy about him. It's not just that I ...

A.   5 October 2008: Okay....what Im about to answer might not be what you want to hear.... After finding myself in the same situation as you, Ive just finished reading a book "he's just not that into you" and the one thing that was stated, which I believe is true eve... (read in full...)

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