A
female
age
30-35,
*oey louise
writes:Me and my boyfriend have been on and off for the last few weeks, We split up again on saturday and met up on the monday night, he then told me he didnt want a relationship anymore and wanted to be single. feeling hurt by this I went out with my mates on wednesday and he was with another girl and he said they were a couple. i feel really hurt by this but still want to be with him what do i do?
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 November 2008): I can understand that it must be very uncomfortable for you and that it must hurt but always rember this quote from Henry van Dyke:
"Happiness is inward, and not outward; and so, it does not depend on what we have, but on what we are".
A
female
reader, Bobbyjo +, writes (3 November 2008):
 You are going through one thing I believe to be one of the most painful things we have to experience in life. Its bad enough being rejected by someone we love, and then seeing them with someone else is heartbreaking. I know exactly how you feel hun, and I bet all the people who read this have,or know of someone who has.
What you need to do is give yourself a little time to go through the grieving process. Cry, lock your self away and pamper yourself for a few days. Try talking to your friends and family and get it out of your system. Then, after a few days, start a day as your "move-on" day and vow to yourself you will, from this day, move on. Don't contact him, dont talk about him and, if you can, dont even think about him. Go out with your friends, throw yourself into work or college, start up new hobbies. Do anything, as long as you arent thinking about him.
After about a month of doing this, and your ex has not contacted you in any way, you then should realise that it is definitely over and he has moved on. But by this time, you will realise that by having no contact with him and not thinking/talking about him for a month, you are also well on your way to getting over him. Whereas, if you continue to pine for him, beg him back or hassle him for answers you are just torturing yourself. Even if you did find another man to make him jealous with, like the previous poster suggested, you are only going to hurt yourself and prolong your healing process.
I hope my advice helps you. I was in the same position as you a few months ago, I know how painful it is. But you have to be strong and believe you can do it.
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