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This question has 6 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
28 November 2010: Recently, I found this poem by Maya Angelou. I think it pretty well summarizes how women should feel about themselves. Here it is, in case it benefits anyone. PHENOMENAL WOMAN by Maya Angelou Pretty women wonder where my secret lies I'm n...
Just some fun!
This question has 11 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
26 December 2008: Something one of my aunts sent me: When I was born, the doctor went to the waiting room and told my father: "We did all we could, but he was born alive". My mom didn't know whether she should keep me or the placenta. Since I was born before ...
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What makes a woman good in bed?
Q. One for the guys here! just a general question. We all know what meakes a man bad in bed right? Well what defines weather or not a woman is good in bed? It's not that I have any probs in this department but I'm really curious lol. Will be asking my ...
A. 18 June 2009: I think this question needs to a general answer, not particular ones. I don't think an answer describing a personal preference would actually work. So, I cannot agree more with Taste of India, who will receive ten stars from me because of her ... (read in full...)
Pale skin and dark hair look beautiful to you?
Q. Ok this might be a silly question but I really need to figure this out. Summer is here ! I have been tanning for a couple of years but think I should stop because of all the skin cancer issues that it can cause. Plus the money issues i'm having at ...
A. 17 June 2009: Fatherly, Morticia spoke French but she was hot :-). I may not have gotten the idea of the show correctly, however, as I was a kid when the show was on TV.
I have noticed what you say about liking women of a certain style, too. And the attracti... (read in full...)
Pale skin and dark hair look beautiful to you?
Q. Ok this might be a silly question but I really need to figure this out. Summer is here ! I have been tanning for a couple of years but think I should stop because of all the skin cancer issues that it can cause. Plus the money issues i'm having at ...
A. 16 June 2009: You sound like a very pretty girl. Give me Morticia anytime; Why do you think Gomez was so much in love with her? Your red hair is a big plus.... (read in full...)
MEN please give me your opinion. What does "Seeing" someone really mean???
Q. I finally got the guy I wanted, but I don't know if it's the right nature of relationship I wanted, though the potential is there. We dated about two years back but it was after his ex of two years had dumped him after cheating, so I was sort of...
A. 16 June 2009: I'll be honest. I think you should not trust he will give you the kind of relationship you want.
It sounds to me like he's very comfortable with things as they are now. He's been seeing you for long, socially and otherwise, and I bet he knows wh... (read in full...)
My husband masturbates all the time...
Q. my husband masturbates every day at least 3 times a day i have never experienced this with him before and its making me feel really bad. the fact that he's maturbating has decreased our sex life from 3 times a day to once every two or three days. I ...
A. 15 June 2009: Sorry: I think there's something wrong with this guy. I don't think it's stress or whatever. It's about sexual preferences. In my humble opinion, there is little the poster can do to change his mind.... (read in full...)
He says he just likes compliments from women, wasn't planning on doing anything!
Q. I was wondering if i was handling this all wrong. I went online the other day and pulled the history on the computer from one day last week I was looking for a paper for college. I thought i found it and low and behold it was his profile for this ...
A. 14 June 2009: Well, you're right to be angry. I think what he wanted was to sleep with someone on the side. It seems to me that he's having trouble with the situation you're in and he is beginning to give signs of it. You have to talk to him and see where you ... (read in full...)
Who schedules sex?
Q. I'm starting to notice that my relationship is one sided and we do thing when she wants to do them, including sex. I was with her the other day and we were in the house watching TV and I wanted to get intimate with her. She tells me no we will have ...
A. 14 June 2009: To me, the real problem is the fact that the relationship is one sided. If it were not, then your woman would take more than just her needs in consideration.
You have to fix that. I don't think finding sex elsewhere is the way to go.... (read in full...)
How can I help my friend get out of this sticky situation?
Q. Hoping for some sound advice here. Often some pretty good answers. I have a friend who is almost seventy who lost her husband a couple of years ago. She has continued to stay living here because her adult daughter and son in law are here. Her ...
A. 14 June 2009: A difficult situation indeed.
I am aware that family relationships in Canada are different from those here. What you are describing is usually the situation where I live. Here, most grandmas look after their grandchildren, and that is somewhat... (read in full...)
My husband masturbates all the time...
Q. my husband masturbates every day at least 3 times a day i have never experienced this with him before and its making me feel really bad. the fact that he's maturbating has decreased our sex life from 3 times a day to once every two or three days. I ...
A. 14 June 2009: This is a tough one. I understand your feeling so bad, because he seems to prefer masturbation over sex with you, even though you do what he wants.
Sometimes people masturbate, behind their partner's back, because they want sexual relief more fre... (read in full...)
He says he just likes compliments from women, wasn't planning on doing anything!
Q. I was wondering if i was handling this all wrong. I went online the other day and pulled the history on the computer from one day last week I was looking for a paper for college. I thought i found it and low and behold it was his profile for this ...
A. 14 June 2009: Your profile says you're a man. So this seems to be a same-sex relationship. Not that it is my business, but I mention it because, if that is the case, I wouldn't understand his wanting to hear compliments from women.
If there's a mistake ... (read in full...)
Advice needed. Boy trouble!
Q. there is this boy called daniel who lives across my road he works for my dad and he comes around a lot. he is an ok friend and im not sure if he likes me back. i really like him. ive been throwing hints at him but i am having no reply. he is not ...
A. 14 June 2009: Maybe Daniel is not taking the hint :-). Hints are ambiguous, because they are not direct statements but phrases made so that the other person might connect the dots. Maybe he's afraid he's connecting them in the wrong way.
Also, since he works... (read in full...)
We are living together but now I feel nothing for him
Q. My boyfriend of only 4 months and I live together (I realize its a mistake to move in together so early) I'm 26 and he's 30. I have lived on my own for about 8 years and he is right from mom's house. The first few weeks were filled with argueing ...
A. 14 June 2009: I am not sure the relationship has no future. He's behaving badly but maybe it's that he is not used to living with someone else and accept another person's ways. Some times the small things are irritating and people find it hard to adjust to ... (read in full...)
How can I leave him after 23 years? Hes making my life hell!
Q. I am in a realtionship for 23 years, we have a 15 year old daughter. We are not married, that is not the issue. The issue is, we get no respect, I am constantly getting yelled at like I am a verbal punching bag by both my daughter and her dad, ( ...
A. 14 June 2009: You're in a very difficult situation, one that is very difficult to be in, and to escape, too. I hope my two cents will help you.
This is a very personal decision. So, think carefully what you will do.
It sounds like there is no way to fix yo... (read in full...)
What is so attractive about the bad boys?
Q. I'm perplexed at the number of women who tell me they want a man who is nice to them, but in reality, the men they are attracted to and form relationships with are "bad boys." Then they spend their time complaining about how the bad boy behaves and ...
A. 13 June 2009: Good question, one that many a man asks himself. And one that people post very often here in Dear Cupid.
It seems that "bad boys" seem secure of themselves, capable of getting things done, and sexually assertive, while the other guys are hardly a... (read in full...)
Should I tell this girl about the spots on my penis?
Q. hello every1 im 15 years old.n i was wondering if ya can give me an advise plezz its very ergent?? ok..see i have these spots on my penis there called Fordyce spots. i had these sinces i was 11. at 1st i was like wut ever u now. but then n the p...
A. 12 June 2009: According to the Wikipedia, "Fordyce's Spots are very common in adult males (50-90%). The condition can appear either as a single lesion or in a symmetrical group of up to one hundred. The spots are typically 1-3mm in diameter". The same article ... (read in full...)
She was an escort and posed for nude photos
Q. I've been dating a sweet, wonderful woman for two and a half years now. She's smart, beautiful, incredibly gentle and kind. I love her a lot and believe she loves me too. I even considered asking her to marry me. Recently however, she con...
A. 12 June 2009: Her posing for nude photos and being an escort were not the best things to do, but I don't think that defines who she is now. Everyone has made things that would rather not mention. She was open about her past, and is giving you the chance to take ... (read in full...)
Husband can't get an erection! What causes this?
Q. Hello, My husband lost his erection about a year ago. We can't make love, because he can't hold it. Do you know how to find out what is causing this? I would like to hear as much opinion as possible even if it's just one word. How do you find o...
A. 12 June 2009: As we men age, it becomes more difficult to sustain an erection. But I don't think age itself is the reason.
For example, diabetes makes it more difficult to sustain an erection. If I understood the conference correctly, it is so because ... (read in full...)
Posing for naked pictures
Q. I would really like to send my boyfriend naked pictures of me but I don't know how I should pose. If anyone has any advice I would really appreciate it.....
A. 11 June 2009: I have advice for you. Those pictures stay in the internet forever, so think carefully whether you actually want to do that.... (read in full...)
Trying to answer a question I received by PM
Q. This is not a question, just my way to hopefully stay in contact with someone. To the person who sent me a private message last night, but canceled her account while I was sleeping: you still need an answer to that matter. I can't respond if...
A. 11 June 2009: One more thing. You said yourself you're insecure and you tried hard to catch him doing something that would hurt you. Well, one day you will succeed, because no one is perfect. I am afraid, however, that you might bring it on you. No offense, ... (read in full...)
Trying to answer a question I received by PM
Q. This is not a question, just my way to hopefully stay in contact with someone. To the person who sent me a private message last night, but canceled her account while I was sleeping: you still need an answer to that matter. I can't respond if...
A. 11 June 2009: Not my problem, but I chose to make it mine to help you.
All the best, always.... (read in full...)
Trying to answer a question I received by PM
Q. This is not a question, just my way to hopefully stay in contact with someone. To the person who sent me a private message last night, but canceled her account while I was sleeping: you still need an answer to that matter. I can't respond if...
A. 10 June 2009: All right. If I understand your situation correctly, you married your husband because you found him to be a man of very high moral standards. He would not look at women with lust unless he was involved with them. In fact, you're his first and ... (read in full...)
Trying to answer a question I received by PM
Q. This is not a question, just my way to hopefully stay in contact with someone. To the person who sent me a private message last night, but canceled her account while I was sleeping: you still need an answer to that matter. I can't respond if...
A. 10 June 2009: I think I should not post my thoughts here. You asked in private, and I have to respond in private. I will let you contact me if you want.
Take care.... (read in full...)
He still wants to have sex, but not live together, is he using God as an excuse?
Q. My boyfriend and i have been together for almost 4 years and have been living together for 3. I don't know how to define a ''good'' relationship, i'd say it is, with the occasional arguements of course. We're both 21. Recently he's gone through a ...
A. 9 June 2009: I agree with the anonymous poster. He's making excuses to leave you in a cowardly way.... (read in full...)
I have HPV..will he leave me?? YOU be the judge
Q. I think I have HPV im just waiting on pathology to come back and confirm it. I only found out a week ago when i noticed a single small lump 'down there'. My sexual history is; 2 people by 19(with protection), an 8 year monogamous relationship ...
A. 9 June 2009: This statement from one of the articles might be particularly useful for you:
"If a partner has HPV, it does not necessarily mean they have had sex with someone else recently. The virus can lay dormant in the body for years without causing ... (read in full...)
I have HPV..will he leave me?? YOU be the judge
Q. I think I have HPV im just waiting on pathology to come back and confirm it. I only found out a week ago when i noticed a single small lump 'down there'. My sexual history is; 2 people by 19(with protection), an 8 year monogamous relationship ...
A. 9 June 2009: Other people have already said that it might not be HPV, and also that, if it is HPV, you may have got it years ago. Contrary to what some people believe, you do not need to have had many partners. One single lovemaking session is enough for ... (read in full...)
I don't want to lose my marriage because of this problem.
Q. Is it possible that a man who can't make love to his wife, due to erection problems from undiscovered psychological problems, can make love to an other women if he falls in love? I mean my wife thinks, if I get turned on from someone else, I will g...
A. 9 June 2009: Is is very much possible not to be able to have an erection with a woman, and then have a fantastic, long-lasting erection with another, so long-lasting, indeed, that it would seem to be powered by Duracell (and those bunnies, well, they wouldn't ... (read in full...)
Is cheating wrong with one other person?
Q. I am on here to ask for advice and comments. I have a child by my man who is 30 years older than me. We have love for each other, however im not in love with him. I have cheated on him twice sexually and don't really regret it because he can't ...
A. 9 June 2009: I find you and your husband to be in very, very different stages of life. You're just beginning to live, and he's already a middle-aged man. While I don't think your cheating is right, I understand why it happened. I think he should be smart ... (read in full...)
He is such a complex character and I want to be there for him to help him through all this.
Q. I'm hoping for some advice to help me through all this. I've been with my partner for 9 years, lived together for 5. We're not married as he always told me he 'wasn't ready' but he would be one day. Anyway a few weeks ago when we were cuddling ...
A. 9 June 2009: Dear poster, I don't think this man is complex. Sorry.
He does not want to marry you or have kids with you. He said that very clearly. That does not mean he does not love you. But, the way things happened, he has to choose whether he marries ... (read in full...)
I think I was used as a rebound girl for my ex boyfriend, but don't understand why he picked me?
Q. My ex boyfriend slept with me two or three times when he were broken up with his girlfriend that he had after me and then left me when the girl came around. (At that time I still loved him and wanted him back...) While we hung out when they were b...
A. 9 June 2009: I don't think I can really tell what happened. It seems that your exboyfriend had a girl, then broke up with her, then was with you, and then broke up with you and returned to her. If I understand correctly, then yes, it could be that he used you. ... (read in full...)
Worried about oral, impetigo "school sore", pullout method, herpes and pregnancy, help please!!
Q. hey im 16 male and i think i got impetigo, some kind of herpes, not a cold sore. i gave my girlfriend oral for the first time about 5 days ago and again last night. ive recently had this little blister pimple thing im not exactly sure when i got ...
A. 8 June 2009: Impetigo is not the same as herpes. Impetigo is an infection by streptococci and staphylococci, which are bacteria, while herpes is an infection by a virus. Impetigo is visually different from herpes. Herpes stays with you forever, while impetigo ... (read in full...)
I'm so confused by my semi-fiance, that I need an interpreter!!!
Q. Last year, I left everything and moved to Spain to be with my then fiance. It has not been an easy transition and he hasn't been as supportive as I would have liked/needed. Anyway, we broke up two months ago, but I don't think either one of us is ...
A. 8 June 2009: I'm actually an interpreter, so perhaps I will help you :-).
You are not together because he doesn't really mean what he says. Don't pay attention to what he says, but what he does.
He was your fiancé. Since your relationship was obviously lo... (read in full...)
I am seeing a therapist, but the issue is not resolved.
Q. Please give me some perspective! I am a 41 year old recently married male. In my younger days, I led a very very wild life. I have had sex with hundreds of women, been with escorts, done threesomes, dated strippers, etc etc. I always was safe ...
A. 8 June 2009: I think dddddddd has a good point, too.... (read in full...)
How long is long enough to expect marriage?
Q. I've been seeing a woman for over 10 years. Due to her family issues we didn't always spend every week together and the relationship was not public to most people. I've been thinking of asking if she really will get married, not just "in a few y...
A. 8 June 2009: As I see, it, she has drawn an invisible line in the sand: "I won't marry you". She is not saying it, but her actions mean it. This is for you to decide, but, in principle, there is nothing that should prevent you from leaving if you don't like ... (read in full...)
How long is long enough to expect marriage?
Q. I've been seeing a woman for over 10 years. Due to her family issues we didn't always spend every week together and the relationship was not public to most people. I've been thinking of asking if she really will get married, not just "in a few y...
A. 8 June 2009: Maybe you didn't creat the impression that it was OK to stay like that. It seems like she's felt comfortable all the time. It doesn't seem like she wants to change that. Ten years is way more than enough.... (read in full...)
Why do men not break up with you?
Q. You've helped in the past so here we go again. The NAVY man. I send him texts saying its over, then he reels me back in and i fall for it. Then he ignores my texts over and over again and reels me back in again. Today I told him he was a jerk, bu...
A. 8 June 2009: It's best if you don't hate him, and just stay away from him for your own sake.
Wish you the best.... (read in full...)
My traditonal indian parents do not accept my American boyfriend! Help!
Q. this is very long. im an indian girl and i have been dating my american white boyfriend for 2 years now. im 19 years old. We are deeply in love and have been ever since we met. all my life, my parents have been extremely overprotective o...
A. 8 June 2009: Some of my relatives and many of my friends went to live in the United States. I realize that making it to America does not mean becoming assimilated right away, and that is so no matter where you come from. But I fail to have a valid reason why ... (read in full...)
Why can't I find a girlfriend? Why do these girls just want me for sex?
Q. I have a dilemma...my girlfriend and I broke up about a little over a year ago. After I took awhile to heal I started dating again and have been meeting girls pretty often. Some of them I dislike and am upfront about it, others I like and try to ...
A. 7 June 2009: I guess something is wrong here, because many girls do want serious involvements. Maybe it's something about you.
In the meantime, can I have your problem?... (read in full...)
Too skinny to date?
Q. Yeah, that's it. I'm 24 now and if you look at me, you'd think I stopped developing when I was 14. 6ft and only 135-140 lbs which apparently is a huge turn off for girls. I'm not going to say I've tried everything in order to gain weight...
A. 7 June 2009: The post by Dearkelja made me kind of smile, because where I live the woman customarily has a bigger butt than the man :-). Most of us are plump, but women more so. Only rarely does the man have a bigger butt :-).
On the other hand, I agree wi... (read in full...)
I am seeing a therapist, but the issue is not resolved.
Q. Please give me some perspective! I am a 41 year old recently married male. In my younger days, I led a very very wild life. I have had sex with hundreds of women, been with escorts, done threesomes, dated strippers, etc etc. I always was safe ...
A. 7 June 2009: I can understand you check other women out, and also your wanting to sleep with them. But cheating on your wife is not part of a good marriage. I think you have to give up on that if you want to stay married. That is what she expects from you.
... (read in full...)
In love with an older woman
Q. im 16, gonna be a junior in the fall and im in love with a woman who is 18 and she just graduated. shes lived 2 houses away from me since i was 3 and babysat my little sister when my parents wouldnt trust me. they had no reason not to trust me, they ...
A. 7 June 2009: I don't know you, but I do agree that your parents didn't trust you just because they were being weird :-). You do sound like a cool guy. I like good fellows like you.
Ehem... Einstein understood the law of relativity, but he was never able to ... (read in full...)
Why do men not break up with you?
Q. You've helped in the past so here we go again. The NAVY man. I send him texts saying its over, then he reels me back in and i fall for it. Then he ignores my texts over and over again and reels me back in again. Today I told him he was a jerk, bu...
A. 7 June 2009: I don't know why other men would not break up with someone. I believe that most of us do break up when the relationship is truly no good. In this case, however, it seems that he knows he has you where he wants you, and that is the game he is ... (read in full...)
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