A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:So what does this girl want?I have a superviser at work who is like how to put it... Bipolar one mintue then she is really nice the next She's screaming and shouting at me. Anyway shes normally like this with everyone but recently when she's in a good mood she'll come up to me and mess up my hair and try and draw on my face, she's around 21 and in 17. Both straight I guess but I would not consider her a close friend. Anyway she constantly ignores me one shift then she is shuffling up my hair and pushing and playfully shoving past me. As a joke I told her I'd smack her and she said 'really?' and she says to me all the time hinting at something sexual. There was a night out and she randomly asked if I was drinking when I said yes she was happy and said'I'm going to do something to get fired'A lad said more like take advantage,you fancy her and she stormed off and wouldn't talk to me. Then on this night out I was drunk and she randomly started asking me things and said 'Do you hate me?'I replied no but she was like you do and went inside then she was sitting in my seat so I stay near her and she had her leg glued to mine and I told her I was scared I might hit her with my spiked boots.She told me she's kick me with her uggs then asked me to feel them and kept asking me to touch them like what the hell is that about?! Then back at work after she ask me why I told her I hated her and I started laughing because she left and I did crazy stuff. I told her she missed my amazing dancing and she looked me dead in the eye and said I just can't wipe that smile off your face it's always there when I'm around. When I am talking to anyone it seems as if she thinking it's a comptiton and try's to talk louder to someone else to make me look. I sometimes catch her looking. Does she like me or am I crazy ? She has a boyfriend and ignores me when he's there and me and him are friends so what's the problem? I want to know what's up with her and was wondering what you guys thought? Because I honestly don't know what I think or feel. Thanks guys.
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at work, drunk, has a boyfriend Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Abella  +, writes (13 September 2012):
 Thank you for the update. And update as often as you like. It's good to update - so please keep us posted.
Good that you have gone to the Union.
Just get your work done. Concentrate on that.
Be like a Duck, serene on top of the water, but paddle (work hard) like everything depends on it. And stay positive and pleasant and smile.
You can survive this nasty woman.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 September 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHey, so here's another follow up sorry about posting two I just want y'all to know what's going on. So I went to work and my manger came up and told me that that's superviser (who isn't my superviser anymore) had told her she made a huge mistake taking me on I don't do any work and I'm really lazy! My manger told me laughed it off then I broke down in tears and explained what's really going on and she was pissed and 4 other people backed me up so she's having a word with her. My mother also works at the store as a trainee manager and well this supivisor has said to people who are friends with my mam that I think I can get away with everything and anything because my mam is a manager and a union rep and that I'm wrong and shes going to make sure I know that and my mam feeds me bullshit information! The people she said it too have asked for further explanation and she's refused point blank to give one. This is now making me want to quit my job but I'm finding it impossable to find another one plus it's a mega high paid job for my age, with good hours. I'm also really worried about her bring my mom into it and it's really starting to bring me down. I've got a opp with a union rep when I go back to work and thanks guys for all the support and advice I honestly appreciate it :) sorry I updated twice I didn't realise the first one hadn't come through as the person who posted the question oops
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 September 2012): Hey, so here's another follow up sorry about posting two I just want y'all to know what's going on. So I went to work and my manger came up and told me that that's superviser (who isn't my superviser anymore) had told her she made a huge mistake taking me on I don't do any work and I'm really lazy! My manger told me laughed it off then I broke down in tears and explained what's really going on and she was pissed and 4 other people backed me up so she's having a word with her. My mother also works at the store as a trainee manager and well this supivisor has said to people who are friends with my mam that I think I can get away with everything and anything because my mam is a manager and a union rep and that I'm wrong and shes going to make sure I know that and my mam feeds me bullshit information! The people she said it too have asked for further explanation and she's refused point blank to give one. This is now making me want to quit my job but I'm finding it impossable to find another one plus it's a mega high paid job for my age, with good hours. I'm also really worried about her bring my mom into it and it's really starting to bring me down. I've got a opp with a union rep when I go back to work and thanks guys for all the support and advice I honestly appreciate it :)
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A
female
reader, Abella +, writes (9 September 2012):
hi your follow up was helpful.
If you can check out what resources are available on the policy towards Bullying and harassment.
Don't allow her to unsettle you. She wants that. Just stay respectful and professional at all times.
Never Sink to her level.
And ignore her stares. If she keeps wasting her time staring it is She who is more likely to get noticed.
Keep on doing well too - maybe that is what makes her jealous.
She is the one with the problem.
Don't allow her to goad you into any unprofessional retaliation - she would love that - but you would be the one harmed by doing that.
This woman, as I explained, is serious potential trouble to you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 September 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHey, so anyway to the person who says I will never make it anywhere drinking at age 17 it's like 2 months until I'm 18 plus in enrolled at college and a B to A student accepted into uni to study law! And you do not know me so do not judge me thanks.
Thank you to everyone who has wrote everyone seems to say the same thing Im not on her department but she always seems to hover around me. I'm trying not to talk to her but her stare is constantly burning into the back of my head. I just don't get what I've ever done to make her want to do this to me, I've had years of this at school and I just don't know why it's got to be me!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 September 2012): Another thing u can do is keep a journal of all the things she says or does to u. Mark it with a date n time. If ur really scared get a small tape recorder keep it rolling in ur shirt. When u have had enough take ur evidence to ut hr specialist or her boss.
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A
female
reader, Abella +, writes (9 September 2012):
Your supervisor is immature and out of control and a woman to be avoided. She is TROUBLE. even if you behave very very respectfully at work she could still cause you MAJOR trouble.
Potentially I think your supervisor is unstable, likely to bully and manipulate you. And worse even try to claim you sexually harassed you. I know that is NOT true - but mud sticks.
Stop flirting with her. Don't ever have a suggestive talk with her. Not at work and not outside work.
Socialise with her at a work function at work only. And keep it TOTALLY professional atall times.
Be diplomatic.
I suspect that she sees you as a threat due to either your skills or your attractiveness.
If you can transfer to another area of the organisation then do. Otherwise look for another job.
This woman is so unstable and so unprofessional that I think she could seriously undermine you at work and affect your reputation.
Be pleasant at work. But completely professional. Dot the I's and cross the T's. make a note of all work you do in your Task Bar in Outlook if you use outlook as part of your work. The day you got the job, the outcome, the date you completed the task.
If your work does not involve outlook then at least have a small pocket book that documents in *dot points what you did each day and the date.
Never talk about her to other staff. If some one is critical of her please hold your tongue. She did not get to be the supervisor at work at 21 without being intelligent. Sadly I think she is completely out of her depth as a supervisor. But keep such comments to yourself at work; if someone else at work criticizes her you should make NO comment, NO comment at all.
And behave in a way whereby she cannot collect info on your to smear your Good Name.
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