| A
female
age
18-21,
anonymous
writes: I have small breasts, and as it is known, *most* guys like big breasts better. Some like small, but I have yet to meet one of those! Most guys just settle for small chested women. Like Salma Hayek is hot because of her big boobs, but Kate Hudson is hot in spite of her small boobs. Kate Hudson is not generally considered hot because of her small breasts. It's like small breasts aren't inherently hot. They're just a flaw that is overlooked. I'm sure if Salma Hayek had small breasts, she wouldn't be as popular or considered as hot.Well, so guys like big breasts, and I'm sick and tired that every time I'm in a relationship, no matter how nice the guy is, they always like big breasts better. And even if it doesn't really matter, well, it makes me feel really bad. Not only was I teased in school, but now to date men that give longing stares to huge cleavage and watch "big tit" porn does send a message that I'm physically inadequate. And trust me I haven't met one guy who likes small breasts - usually, even guys who date small chested women later confide in their buddies and tell them they wish the gf was bigger! Imagine telling a guy that "more than a mouthful is wasted". Ouch! How would a guy feel if someone told him something like that!Of course, the only option is surgery. But then again, most men claim they hate implants and have a lot of judgements against women with implants (aside from that, implants are quite risky). Even if I had a great job done, that looked and felt natural, I'd have to tell the guy I was dating, or the guy that one day I'll marry "hey, these aren't real", and well, most guys think these type of women are vain, insecure, slutty, attention-whores, etc. I'm just sick and tired of always having to accept that I'm "lesser than..." physically, that whoever I'm dating will always long for big boobs secretly, even if they say it doesn't matter, just knowing that makes me feel like crap! And I just have to grin and bear it. But I'm tired of that. Cleavage is everywhere and I feel so inferior, especially with men's fascination with big breasts. And if they hate fake boobs too, then what are my options? I know this is probably a very dumb question but I'm desperate, I hate feeling like this, so what can I do?I have never seen a guy rubber neck to check out a small chested woman. I have never seen a guy go "WOW!" just because a girl has small breasts. Yet these are reactions that men have when they see a couple of DDs. I have never seen a guy say "check out her small boobs, they're so hot!". And if you look around in the Internet, it's filled with ads for breats enlargement pills (scams) and posts of insecure women like me who wonder if small breasts really are attractive. You never see big chested women doubt if big breasts are attractive. Sure some get reductions, but usually because of extremely large breasts and discomfort. And men always reply with the same "yes, big breasts are better, but we don't mind small ones". That's what upsets me! I don't want a guy to "not mind" my breasts, I want him to think they're the best, better than some DDs. Most guys don't like it when their busty girlfriends get reductions. You get my drift.So yes, what can I do? I feel so desperate! :(
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boobs, breasts, insecure, porn, the internet Reply to this Question |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 November 2009): you shouldn't feel lesser than because of your breast size im sure you are a very attractive woman. however, every guy has his own likes and dislikes and women do too. some guys like a girl with a bigger bottom or with blonde hair and so on. we are all unique and special and im sure you'll find a guy who can see that.
A
female
reader, PC85  +, writes (9 November 2009):
Hi
I understand how you feel. I also have small breasts but since i have been with my bf i have learned to love them. occasionally i do wish they were bigger but i know how much he loves them. Apparently they are perky and at least they won't sag like bigger breasts do. i know men find big breasts attractive when they are held up in bras but when naked just remember you will look so much hotter because yours aren't round your waist. Learn to love yourself because then someone will love you for all the same reasons. xx
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A
male
reader, BigKat  +, writes (9 November 2009):
I guess you could say "we are out there."
If chooseing a girl came down to breast size, i would lean towards the smaller. That said, chooseing a girl doesnt come down to that.
Kind person, confident posture, general hygene, and much more come before breast size.
But when we finally reach the "breast category" ... I may have worded it a little different but, i think the idea behind this is perfect, thank you Illithid,
"Guys rubberneck for large breasts, but these are usually the shallow guys you don't want. Small breasts "ARE (my own edit)" hot, but usually not to the KIND OF GUY that would overtly do a double-take."
Comeing from a straight 21 yr old male.
Finally, If you are looking for answers, do not look for them because what OTHERS think, do it for you.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (21 October 2009): What you should do is stop worrying about it. We are all different and that is men as well as women. People's preferences are undoubtedly influenced by what they see while they are growing up, so boys can't be blamed for prefering bustier women if that is what they are confronted with every time they open a newspaper.
But I happen to be a man who prefers a woman with a flatter chest. I don't know why that is, it is just what I have always found more attractive. I read an article once that claimed that people's sexual preference ( I don't think they meant straight or gay, I reckon that is pretty much determined from the day you are born, but just the sort of person you find attractive )is influenced by the images you see when you are aged around seven. And I think that could be true. Because when I was about that age, I didn't see the kind of newspapers that carried those sorts of images of busty women. But what I remember seeing was an advert in one of my Mum's magazines. It was an advert for a health drink or some such thing. The photograph in the advert was a fairly tasteful shot of a nude woman. I remember that I was quite fascinated by this image, probably because I had never seen a nude woman before. And the woman in the photograph had quite small breasts. So maybe that is what influenced my preference for women who look that way. Unfortunately men do seem to have an instinctive inability not to "oggle" at a big cleavage, but I don't think that necesarally means those are the only women we find attractive.
I would like to think that the size of a woman's chest doesn't really impact that much on whether I find her attractive or not, but going on past experiences, I would have to say that I prefer women with smaller breasts, and I am sure there must be a lot of men who feel the same way.
It's not something I care that much about. You don't HAVE to have small breasts for me to think you are nice looking, but it is just the sort of figure I find I am naturally attracted to.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (15 October 2009): I must be the only man in the world who loves small breast. I am enthralled with small breast and love the way they look it's actually a bigger turn on to me than big breast which disgust me.
I feel you baby wish we have crossed paths I am sure you would have turned me on!
Peace
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A
female
reader, Ginalolabridga + ♥, writes (13 October 2009):
 I would like to give you my point on big breasts, they are not all they are cracked up to be i am big breasted and i don't always feel comfortable with them, i hear what your saying about some men who nearly break their neck trying to get an eyeful of big boobs but not all men are like that, and i think most are quite polite at looking without making you feel your a freak!
I suffer at times with sore backs, i also don't have the pleasure of having pert stick out boobs like girls with smaller ones have, as most big breasted women need a bra type harness to keep them uplifted! and when the harness come off they do droop slightly, not attractive let me tell you!
Where as if your smaller they can be pert like all the time with or without a bra, now I'd give my right arm to have that again!
Try not to be too hung up on this it is not the end of the world, many women hate certain parts of their bodies and we have to live with what we have as most don't have the dosh to go get it all fixed and even if we did would we?
I think you might just be meeting the wrong kind of guys cause believe me not all men are tarred with the same brush as far as liking big boobs to smaller ones.
Love your body, love who you are it is what is inside that counts not whats on the outside, you sound a well adjusted nice girl and that is something you cant buy so treasure what you have your you and unique!
Gina
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 October 2009): I've dated four guys. I'm a size B, and each guy has stated at one time or another (without my solicitation)that he prefers smaller breasts to larger ones. it's probably the type of guys you're attracting. seek and ye shall find, so stop looking for this flaw or prerference (whatever you want to call it) in men, and maybe you'll find men who don't prefer gigantoid boobs over more manageable smaller ones. also remember, there are 'ass men' out there, who appreciate a fine ass over any paricular size of boob, and actually, i have see guys drool over flatter or smaller chested women. it does happen. not everyone's the same. i know four guys with crushes on natalie portman, and she has teeny boobs. no problem for her, i guess...and, it doesn't hurt to have more confidence, and not focus on what you perceive to be what they want you to have verses what you actually have.
sometimes, people also project their insecurities. you might have dated a guy at one time or another who liked your boobs, but your insecurity made you blind to it. so what if he jerked off to some large breasted porno stars? that doesn't mean it's the only thing that turns him on, and also don't forget that there is porn dedicated especially to conniseurs of smaller breasted women.
...big boobies are an advertisement (hard to ignore), so almost everyone's gonna notice (even many women), but not everyone actually wants to buy the particular product being advertised, if you know what i mean.
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A
female
reader, Ask oldersister + ♥, writes (13 October 2009):
 I would say than any guy who isn't completely turned on seeing you naked with breasts that are proportionate to your body, is weird or has some sort of debilitating fetish. Both my mom and my sister are DD and I'm a proportionate B and wouldn't trade mine for the world or get surgery to make them bigger. Smaller breasts tend to be better shaped, have a longer shelf life, easier to exercise and stay in shape, don't sag, don't leave permanent bra-strap marks on your shoulders, and don't cause back problems like my mom and sister have.
If you feel insulted or offended that guys actually look in your eyes instead of at your chest or gawk at women in short skirts while you are wearing more conservative clothing or hit on women that wear a ton of makeup when you are more natural- your concept of feminine allure, intrigue, and sexuality is totally off. Most normal men appreciate subtlety, not in your face shit.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 October 2009): I can honestly say that big boobs have never done it for me. Sorry to be mean, but I've always noticed that the guys who go for big boobs are guys who need everything to be big and unsubtle because they are not so bright themselves.
There are loads of guys out there who prefer small boobs. If you don't belive be just google as if you were looking for porn with girls with small boobs insead of HUGE. You'll see that there are millions of results. Someone's looking at it?
Look at it this way (i do): Size isn't the most important thing with breasts, shape is. Big boobs are very rarely a nice shape, they are usually stretched and saggy or if they aren't now, they will be soon. Smaller ones are much more likely to be a nice shape. "Perky", if you will ;)
Focus on other features that you can make something of, maybe you have nice legs that yuo can make a little feature of. You will find that the attention that you get is much more polite and worthwhile.
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A
female
reader, boo22 +, writes (12 October 2009):
 Hi, my friends got an A cup and she's had more guys than most women i know lol
Being sexy isn't about tits!! Its about your attitude,and my friend says she loves her two fried eggs and she wouldn't change anything. I believe her.
Men just like breasts, full stop. Whatever there size or shape. Men don't care as much as you think.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 October 2009): All breasts are fantastic, but theres something about more petite ones that just feels and looks great. My last gf was 10A, but since then I've... well... done my ABC's and A's are still the sexiest in my opinion.
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A
male
reader, rcn + ♥, writes (12 October 2009):
 stick with what you've got. you've been with some really shallow people. why do you need to change for them. it a relationship, the body should be second to the person. if you really love who you're with for who they are, their body is perfect because it belongs to the person you love.
the only reason to change anything on you is for sense of self. not to please anyone. if a guy wants the big boobs, he's not the person for you, you don't need to cater to his desire. their are so many guys who aren't into the big bouncy ones. you'll find him and when you do, you'll be grateful that you didn't change, cause he may not have chose you if you had. I know I don't represent all guys, but from my view, I'd rather be with someone who's small and real than big and fake.
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A
female
reader, satindesire +, writes (12 October 2009):
 Sweetie, let me tell you something. I've had a flat chest, and I've had really big boobs. I've never had a shortage of partners. The thing is, insecurity will do nothing to make your boobs grow, nor will it help attract a mate.
Men are genetically driven to gape at larger breasts. They're a signal that a woman is fertile, young, and capable of bearing healthy children. It's not shallow, it's pure and simple human nature. We're meant to reproduce and carry on the line, and that's one way God, Nature, or whoever you want to point the finger at...made big breasts.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with any size breasts. Forgive men for their behavior, they honestly CANNOT help it. Just like when I see a muscular guy with a chest full of dark curly hair, my palms start sweating and I feel like my face is getting red?...well, that's evolution for you.
Looks fade with time, and quality men with brains bigger than the size of a raccon's know this. Intelligence, confidence, humor, kindness...those are the qualities that TRULY matter when it comes to what makes a woman hot.
Most men do like larger breasts, but they really can't help it. Instead of railing against something that's written into their DNA and couldn't change even if they wanted to, really set your mind to improving your self esteem and watch the guys flock to you.
By the way, if you haven't noticed by what's on TV and the movies, THIN IS IN. Tiny girls like you should be rejoicing over your extra-small T-shirts and size 4 jeans. Many girls would kill to be skinny, TRUST. Large breasts do NOT equal attractive. Large breasts are just another way God makes sure we're shagging good and proper like He wants us to!
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A
female
reader, xAx +, writes (12 October 2009):
 Wow, what you wrote is amazing! You have taken all perspectives ect into account. This is pretty much what goes through every small breasted girl, which includes me! The only difference is that it doesn't bother me much.
I've read this to my boyfriend and he says " the niceness of boobs depend on the person. Like with my girlfriend, if she had big boobs, it would look odd."
Hmmm...???
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 October 2009): Most men are very shallow in regards to why they like a woman.
Myself, I could care less how large or small a woman's breast are. There's more to her than that.
Anyway, be proud of who you are and what God has given you. I'm sure there is a guy out there, who will appreciate you for the person you are and not for the size of your breast or the lack thereof.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 October 2009): Most guys are really shallow in regards to why they like women.
I myself, think there is more to a lovely lady than the size of her breast or the shape of her butt and legs.
But that is me.
Anyway, I believe there is a guy out there for you, who won't judge you by the size of your breast or the lack thereof.
Good luck to you.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 October 2009): I have seen small, perky breasts that are just so hot! Hershey's Kisses that just point at you - you just can't help but want to grab one! Large boobies look good on some girls, small ones on others. They have to go with the body size/shape. I'm sure yours fit you quite nicely.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 October 2009): I like looking at big ones more than I like feeling them. Exaggerated things go well in the media. They are doing it with guys muscles more too.
I would not hold it against a girl if she did get surgery. I would never push her into it on my account because its not that important to me. But as long as she doesn't go overboard with it and look and feel really fake then I would be fine with it.
Some people say "only shallow women get boob jobs and nosejobs" but I dont think so. Just because you got worked on doesnt mean your automatically high maintinence or stupid. Makeup or teeth whitening or dying or highlighting your hair are not natural. Where do we draw the line? People used to do less of all of it and now its normal.
I dont mean to start talking you into getting surgery that you dont want. I am just saying I understand why you might have thought about surgery. I dont have any lower opinion about people that do it.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 October 2009): Actually I prefer smaller real breasts to those fake stretched out melons you'll see stuffed into a bikini. I find that over sized boobs are pretty gross (Pam Anderson), like the sweaty hulked out body builders with the veins popping out all over. Ugggh.. Who thinks that looks good? Maybe 1% of the population. Usu. big muscles equals small package.
When I date a girl with small breasts I am always nervous about feeling them, because I don't want to cause an uncomfortable situation by pointing out that I noticed they are small.. sound dumb? uh well sorry.
From my perspective after I massage a breast for a few minutes I will begin licking, sucking and nibbling on the nipple anyway. At that point, size doesn't matter. It's not like I can get the whole breast in my mouth or do anything else with it if it is gigantic. Size only matters for appearance, not sex.
My g/f had breast implants, because she wanted more fashion options. But I insisted that they be reasonable in size. She let me pick them out. I nailed the size because she looks proportional and great. She gets the leers from the construction workers, but not for being a freak show. For being proportional.
If you do decide to get them augmented, be sensible.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 October 2009): EVERYTHING IS IN THE MIND. This is what my doctor said when i complained him about pre mature ejaculation. It took me a looooong time to stop thinking about my duration and when i had stopped thinking about it i cud last longer quite longer. So try thinking about the good things u have,become little mature.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 October 2009): That is so funny cause I have large breasts and the guy I am dating, hates my breast he says all the time how he wishes that I had a smaller chest. I have actually heard him say that Kate Hudson was hot because she had small breasts. Just hold out you will find a guy that likes you for who you are and not your bra size. I always had the problem that guys only dated me because I had a big chest and they would become uncomfortably fixated on them. Don't you worry. My friend has an A cup and she just wears a padded push up. I wish I had a smaller chest I can never find a cute bra and panty set they think that just because you have a D cup that your butt must be plus size too, it sucks.
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A
male
reader, Illithid + ♥, writes (12 October 2009):
 Guys rubberneck for large breasts, but these are usually the shallow guys you don't want. Small breasts can still be hot, but usually not to the KIND OF GUY that would overtly do a double-take.
Now, I've been in two serious relationships, both with A-Cup girls, and I loved both of their sets. The second girl in particular had the most amazingly hot breasts and I was utterly in her control whenever they came out to play. No, they weren't huge, but they were firm and smooth skinned and perfectly in proportion with her body. And she knew the power they had over me and was confidant with them.
Then again, I HATE large breasts (at least DD's anyway, bleh). B and C are nice and all, but what matters to me is not the size, it's the feel, and A's feel GREAT. No, they won't turn heads like a car wreck, but when the top comes off, they're what a friend once called "A Good English Handful". Anything too big to fit in a hand is more than I need, or want.
But maybe that's just me? (Straight 25-year-old male)
Also, let me mention this: Those huge ones? They sag... a lot. With age, they turn into droopy and depressing ones. Small = perky for a lot longer, possibly forever if you keep supportive bras. Not to mention the reduced back ache you'll suffer. There is a REASON women (including a friend of mine) get breast REDUCTIONS.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 October 2009): It's actually just as hard to find clothes. Small breasts mean that you can't fill out most tops, and a lot of tight fitting stuff makes you look like a little boy. And I'm not big on chicken fillets or padded bras, it's just false advertising
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A
male
reader, Uncle Phil + ♥, writes (12 October 2009):
 Huge breasts have a certain amount of novelty value, as do big ones. The women that own them wish they had smaller though. Chances are their men wish the same thing.
I'm not going to go on at length telling you that what you've got is fine, but please believe me when I say it is. All women are beautiful, all breasts are beautiful - both in varying degrees.
Any man who judges you on the size of your breasts isn't worth your time, and believe me when I tell you there are more men who would prefer normal breasts to monster breasts. Think of the pluses - you can go jogging without knocking yourself senseless and clothes are a lot easier to buy.
I'd love to hear the views on this subject of a woman who has big knockers! Anyone?
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