A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi,I've realized that I might be struggling with depression and it's taking a toll on my relationship with my closest friend. He knows me better than anyone and knows that I'm upset and something is happening to me but doesn't know why, and in turn gets mad at me for not opening up to him. But when the depression hits the last thing I want to do is open up to him. I physically cannot form the words.I think deep down I'm afraid of what will happen when we go our separate ways after university and am just trying to protect myself from getting too attached.It's breaking my heart because I know that I'm pushing him away and creating this distance between us. We're so close that sometimes I forget that I am alone in this world. And then the depression hits and the loneliness comes rushing back. Usually all I need is a hug and for him to remind me that he loves me. But I'm way too proud to admit it. Help. Do I open up now and risk making the pain of him leaving me all alone in the future worse? Or am I doing the right thing keeping my distance now?
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female
reader, EFM94 +, writes (28 April 2016):
 Yes you should tell him. My sister and Dad both suffer from depression and I'd usually find themselves both cooped up in their rooms alone staring at a wall. That is not how to deal with it. Luckily they both know they can open up to me now as I love them and wont judge.Since they have started talking more I can see more smiles and more springs in their steps. It's lovely to see.You sound like you have a good friend here. Regardless of what illness you are dealing with, he will still love and support you! Everyone needs that in their life.Don't be afraid to admit that you're struggling. Depression is an awful illness and you could definitely use a friend so you don't go through it alone. The worst thing you can do is bottle it all up... Please dont. Talking about it is the best medicine. And it WILL get better I promise. Don't feel defeated.
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (14 April 2016):
 I think you are handling it wrong, he wants to be there for you so let him, a problem shared is a problem halved. He sounds like a great friend and he just wants to help you, therefore you should let him help you. Okay so you are going to different university's that doesn't mean that you will never talk again, you will still have each other, social media phone calls, holidays. That can make a friendship stronger not lose it. So try open up to him more, it will make the friendship stronger. Also talk to your family and other friends, don't suffer alone.
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A
male
reader, Denizen +, writes (14 April 2016):
 The more people you tell the better. I know that is counter intuitive, particularly if you are on a downward cycle. However it has numerous benefits for you. It lets people know you aren't just being difficult, and it show courage to admit to being ill. And you can take pride in that.
Why should it take courage? Well, because it has been stigmatised for too long, despite the fact that many successful, creative people have coped with the darkness.
I hope you are employing coping mechanisms to help break the cycle of your depression. You will be better.
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