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What's the answer? Buy a dildo? Think of images? Watch porn? How do I learn to turn myself on?

Tagged as: Family, Sex, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (9 January 2014) 7 Answers - (Newest, 10 January 2014)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, *indaloo writes:

I am new to this site- I will ask this question anyway.

I would like to know what is the best ways to turn yourself on (masterbate) and make it so good?

so you watch porn or just picture dirty things ?

Does anyone suggest buying dildos? I want to buy one but dont want it to come in the post because i a frightened it will show my family what it is on the outside of the package.

Thanks

View related questions: dildo, porn

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A female reader, like I see it United States +, writes (10 January 2014):

like I see it agony auntPersonally I'm not a fan of dildos. Unless you are one of those lucky women who is able to achieve orgasm through vaginal penetration alone, you may find that a dildo (no matter the size) is not actually satisfying to you. Go with a vibrator - in addition to being smaller and typically more discreet in appearance, they provide the direct clitoral stimulation most women require.

If you absolutely cannot find a place to buy one in person, you might try calling or e-mailing the customer service staff at your sex toy website of choice and inquiring as to their shipping/packaging methods. Many of these stores are aware that their customers prefer to be discreet and make an effort to bill/ship accordingly.

Concerning porn, I do watch it from time to time but I'm probably in the minority (of women, anyway). Many people find it to be exploitative of women and/or problematically addictive, so it might not be something I'd recommend getting into right off the bat. Try toys first and see if they provide an adequate outlet for your sexual needs.

Good luck and best wishes! :)

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A female reader, Xx-Scorpio-xX United Kingdom +, writes (10 January 2014):

Xx-Scorpio-xX agony auntrecently i bought my first sex toy- a small vibrator for my clit from ann summers "golden bullet" for £10 and i LOVE it, it's amazing- i reccommend so much :) i also watch porn clips of my fetishes and look at sexual pictures :)

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A reader, anonymous, writes (9 January 2014):

Everyone's different as to what works but it's a lot of fun finding out so just experiment.

Get a small vibrator and try it on your clitoris, try porn too if you like and try different types to see what works.

Oh and sex toys that come in the post usually come in discreet packaging OP or at least have that as an option. You could just go into a sex shop or maybe Ann Summers have them. I know here in Ireland you can buy small durex vibrators in Tesco and Pharmacies.

Just experiment and enjoy your body OP, and remember the more you know how to pleasure yourself the easier it is to pass on that kind of knowledge to a partner. You'd be surprised how many questions we get from women who either don't know they can only orgasm through clit stim or complain that their partner is useless in bed when they don't even know themselves what works for them.

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (9 January 2014):

So_Very_Confused agony auntI vote for either a hand held shower massage (my fav) or a pocket rocket... which is a small lipstick sized vibrator that takes a single AA battery....

and trust me if you order something online it will come in a discrete brown box I'm sure. I doubt it will say "this is a masturbatory device" on the box.

Since most women do not orgasm from penetration a dildo is essentially useless IMO.

as for what I think about... mostly I use my imagination (and with over 40 years of experience I have many memories) but I've been known to use some porn now and then too...

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (9 January 2014):

Vibrator, not porn that can cause a lot of problems later on.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (9 January 2014):

Honeypie agony auntI agree with person12345 - no dildos - that is not going to do the trick. Get a vibrator (and you can order online - they do NOT plaster a picture of YOU and HUGE rubber dick on the package - it's done pretty discreet.)

There are some shaped and sized like a lipstick with a buzz buzz to it, it's simple and great for clitoral stimulation.

Water proof ones for the shower bath are useful too.

Go online and look around. See what tickles your fancy - pun intended.

As for the porn - no porn. Personally I don't need porn. My imagination is pretty lively.

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A female reader, person12345 United States +, writes (9 January 2014):

person12345 agony auntCommon things, removeable showerheads, fingers, lube that sort of thing. If you want a toy, get an external one, not a dildo. Women get pleasure from the clitoris and that's where you should start. While internal can be fun for many, it's generally a bonus or in addition to external stimulation.

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