A
female
age
41-50,
*anhams
writes:My question is 'what should I do with my husband'? He was caught in December meeting women online then calling them and then actually meeting in person two of them. He did not have sexual relations, but just the same it hurt. He promised to quit chatting, but he did not .. I have his password and I have been looking at the archives and he is still talking to women, even asking if they could meet. I deleted the chat software from the computer, but I think he will find away to meet women online. What do I do? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 August 2007): Hi. I'm in a similar situation at the moment. 2 years ago i found out my husband had been seeing a woman half my age (she's only 20 now!) we built bridges, went to a counsellor etc, got back on track, then last year i found out she'd been pestering him, phoning, emailing, texts etc and he had replied. I said i'd work on it again for the sake of our 2 kids (7 & 5 yrs), but just found out, last week that he's still speaking to her, she's still emailing, texting etc.....and she always seems to make the first move.....how can i get rid of this little tramp ? and should i bother working on the marriage, yet again? you tell me what you decide and i'll see if it works for me
xx
A
male
reader, Wild Thaing  +, writes (25 July 2007):
 You must decide if you can develop the in trust him that is the foundation of all good marriages. He has shown a propensity for deceit, which sets you and him very low on the trust scale.
Do you have any children?
...............................
A
female
reader, Butterflyfly  +, writes (25 July 2007):
 My ex hubby was an 'accomplished' chatter before and after we got married. I was hurt at the beginning when i found out about those real women havin real intimate conversations with him and he was all up for it. i confronted it but he just hid his tracks better. to this day he still logs on and chats the pants off some ladies and meets them up if possible etc. he's addicted to it, i think he will only stop it if he really wants to but hmm..
...............................
A
female
reader, skye +, writes (24 July 2007):
 I couldnt agree more with eyeswideopen and candy00s. You deserve much better than this. When you married your husband you both agreed to forsake all others; this has to be a two way thing or you are going to get hurt. I have found that things that keep coming back to hurt us are lessons we have not learnt the first time around. I would give it one last chance. You did not enter into a marriage lightly nor should you exit that way; but be firm with yourself that this will be final. You have put up with this behaviour long enough. Ask your husband why he is so unhappy with your relationship that he still feels the need to chat with these women. Tell him how upset it has made you feel and make it perfectly clear that it is unacceptable to you. If it continues, be resolute and leave, for it would not be long before he did embark on a sexual relationship with one of the women. Believe me, there are many decent men out there who would respect you and care for your feelings. You do not need to put up with this pain any longer. I say this with the deepest of consideration for you...learn this lesson soon.Good luck and I will be thinking of you.
...............................
A
female
reader, candy00s +, writes (24 July 2007):
 I think you need to tell him now that you refuse to put up with this, you deserve better.
Maybe a trial seperation will make him realise that his behaviour has been out of order and make him re think what he wants from your relationship.
OKay that was good deleting the software from the PC but he is looking to meet women and im sure he will find a way - you need to tell him straight now that you arent prepared to put up with this.
oxo
...............................
A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (24 July 2007):
 What he heck is he thinking? It won't be long before he does cheat, there are some pretty desperate women out there who will certainly be willing partners. Have one more talk with him, let him know you know what he's been up to. Make it very clear to him that you will not tolerate this nonsense anymore. If he does it again I'd separate. This behavior is totally unacceptable. You deserve more respect than this that's for dang sure, make sure you get it sweetheart!
...............................
|
