A
male
age
41-50,
*nonymous Coward
writes:Just over two years ago I met the most incredible and beautiful woman. She is a professional Dominatrix and I had sought out her services to indulge some 'kinks'. However, we hit it off and never did anything professionally. We became really good friends and then more.I used to ask her to indulge my 'kinks' but she says that she does enough of that at work and it should be enough for me to just be with her. It's like dating a prostitute who won't sleep with you, if you'll pardon the expression.I accepted that with difficulty, because she still does everything I have asked for with strangers. I thought everything was great. We argued a little but always made up, like everyone does.Now this is the problem, almost a month ago we spent the day together and it was incredible, she said, and I quote 'everything was perfect'. I was so happy.Then the next day she is ignoring me, now she has ignored me for almost a month. I have heard through friends that she hates me, I repulse her, that I'm toxic and that she has been trying to get rid of me for over a year. Whether that last part is true or not, I don't know maybe she just said it knowing it would get back to me.She says I am to much stress and that she has enough of that right now. Honestly I know I haven't been perfect sometimes, but I always bought her gifts and flowers. I was romantic and caring. I love her so much and I just don't know what to do.I feel so lost, I feel like something else is going on that I don't know about. Maybe her feelings for me have grown so she is pushing me away? I don't want to move on or find someone else. I know that we are meant to be, I have tried to give her space but she is telling everybody that she is happier without me in her life.I know that the woman I love is still there, I just have to reach her somehow. Any advice would be really appreciated.
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female
reader, DESTINY 23  +, writes (19 November 2009):
 I think some of these people on here are messed up souls
Ive read about there problems and want to throw up
I think your sweet and really a kind hearted person .. But
your native to her. I think she is disconnected as a person and you are in touch with your feelings. Look if someone stops talking to you ...(( something wrong))). Doesnt seem logical? I dont talk to to certian people if they upset me and piss me off. She might not like you and has said stuff but you need to move on. I wouldnt let any person treat me like that!!! Ignore her give her a taste of her own medicne.
A
female
reader, Another_Kapiti  +, writes (18 November 2009):
 Can you talk to mutual friends? These same friends who told you she 'hates' you might be able to give you some more information, though it would be easier going straight to the source! Can you get a friend to go as a mediator between the two of you maybe?
I can see her point though, about mixing business with pleasure, maybe her being a dominatrix is just her work persona? Maybe she isn't really like that in real life? I'm just guessing here and speculation isn't really going to help you!
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