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Should I leave my husband so I can be happy with the friend I have been in love with for years, or stay in order to keep my family together?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Friends, Marriage problems, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (24 February 2010) 3 Answers - (Newest, 24 February 2010)
A female United States age 36-40, anonymous writes:

my husband of 4 yrs had an affair with my little sister but i really do love him and we have 3 beautiful kids.On the other hand my best friend of 5 yrs told me hes tired of watching me hurt and he has always loved me just too scared that if he told me he would lose me all together. In all honesty i have always loved him too just never made anything of it for same reason. What do i do i would never have gotten married if i believed for a sec. my love would fade but i dont deserve the heartbreak either,What do i do be happy or keep my family together.

View related questions: affair, best friend

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A female reader, Laura1318 Malaysia +, writes (24 February 2010):

Laura1318 agony auntIf you leave, will you find your happiness? Is the grass greener on the other side ?

Maybe , initially you will find some happiness but once when the glamour or honeymoon wears off, life will return to the same boring and monotonous lifestyle.

After a few years down the road many women apparently feel undesired and many men feel taken for granted.

Marriages can become stale after a period of time. You need to work at your marriage to bring back the sparks .

Focus on your family and your husband and involve them in some activities together.

You can go on a holiday together and get back on track .

You cannot change him but you can change the way you treat him . He will see the new you and will respond differently.

Go online and Google for 'Stale marriages ' and get more tips on how to get out of the rut.

Give your half dead marriage the kiss of life!

Reference

http://www.cbn.com/family/familyadvice/Hawkins_StaleMarriage.aspx

Breathing life into a stale marriage

http://www.timesunion.com/AspStories/story.asp?storyID=884451&category=HealthyLife

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A male reader, CaringGuy United Kingdom +, writes (24 February 2010):

Do what makes YOU happy. Your husband had an affair with your sister, and to be honest that would be enough to make most people run a mile and never have contact again. But take things slow with this other guy, because you don't want to walk into another mess.

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A female reader, mystiquek United States + , writes (24 February 2010):

mystiquek agony auntKids or not, I could never stay with a man who had an affair with my sister! That's just wrong on so many levels! LEAVE!

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