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She seems like a nice girl, but I think she is also a fake profile who follows me

Tagged as: Dating, Friends, Friends with Benefits, Social Media, Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (10 April 2019) 4 Answers - (Newest, 12 April 2019)
A male United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Hi ladies and gentlemen

Sorry, this is going to be a long and very weird story.

I met a girl, we spent 1 day together (platonic) and it was nice. we kept in touch and grew closer but we live 9 hours by car away from each other so didn't see each other again, but she expressed an interest in me and i said i'd be happy to get to know her more.

She seems like a nice, normal girl.

However suddenly on the same day she requests to follow my instagram, a fake profile also does the same. The fake profile also follows many of my friends. I had her added before but she deleted me. As my account is private, the only way to know my friends is to be my friend. So this fake profile is either my current friend or a previous friend.

This account added about 30 of my friends and then asked me to sleep with her, i said no. Then they added me on facebook, kept doing the same. The fake profile and the real girl also added me on facebook on the same day too.

I'm pretty sure sadly that they are the same person. This fake profile i think is the real girl trying to test me, see if i have a girlfriend i didn't tell her about etc.

This girl often seems to not trust me, worry i am too good for her and would find another girl. she always says "i am too high level for her" which is a weird way to put it, but the fake profile used the exact same phrase.

She writes exactly the same way, knew things only she would know, added me on the same days etc. So when i said to the fake profile i know who you are, suddenly she confessed to being this girls friend and she had taken her phone last saturday (however the fake instagram profile first started to add me weeks ago).

It just doesn't add up.

So now the real girl says she lost her phone at a party (which she told me nothing about despite talking to her that day and the day after, no mention of a party or a lost phone). etc. She just told me she changed her phone.

Because i felt this girl was responsible, i told her she had to tell her friend she had 4 hours to delete the accounts and stop it or i will call the police.

At first she said she couldn't, but sure enough, just before 4 hours passed, they were deleted.

I am 99% sure this girl is doing this to me, but i cannot be 100% sure. What should i do? just go with my gut? i'm worried if i do that she could do something crazy as she has already done something crazy before.

I'm trying to make some new social media, to get her attention to those for some weeks so that if she tries to create trouble after i confront her she won't be able to contact my real friends.

what do you think?

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A reader, anonymous, writes (12 April 2019):

Don't confront her angrily, she has complied with your request. I also agree that she is likely the same person; but as long as the accounts were deleted, no need for any further discussion about it. There's no crime here.

You need to inform her that you're very uncomfortable about your connection with her; and at this point you wish no further contact. Also let her know that if you find any unusual profiles in the future; they will be declined, and you will be alerting your friends and site security.

Block her, and forget about it.

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A female reader, CindyCares Italy +, writes (12 April 2019):

CindyCares agony aunt Something crazy, like what ? trouble like what ? and why ever should you " confront " her ? Just block her and move on. Why should you want to create new social media to divert her attention on those ? That would be so much pointless silly drama over nothing.

Just remove her and file her under " it seemed like a good idea at the moment, but ". I get that she piqued your interest and got you intrigued, but, beside being with 99 % of probability a liar and a troublemaker- in the remote 1 % probability that she is not the one stalking your accounts- she STILL would be a girl living 9 hours away from you . I mean, 9 hours away ! and all for just a

" nice " date once ?..I am sure you can meet someone who is interesting, and interested, also closer home.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (12 April 2019):

Honeypie agony auntYep, I agree with N91

STOP wasting your time. IF she is following you (still) on any account) I'd contact your friends and let them know to delete her if they wish as you presume she is stalking you through them. And then BLOCK and delete her too. On social media and phone.

And then FORGET about her.

Why would you create new social media to bait her? YOU like drama?

JUST accept that she isn't someone you can trust or someone you should keep around.

If you want a GF, find someone in your OWN geographical location. Someone you can spend time with IN person. Get to know IN person and LASTLY.... quit all this teenage social media drama bullshit.

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A male reader, N91 United Kingdom +, writes (12 April 2019):

N91 agony auntYeah it’s definitely her.

Question is why are you wasting your time on someone like this? It’s exceptionally childish on her part. You live 9 hours apart so nothing is ever going to seriously materialise is it? My guess is that she likes you as more than a friend and she’s checking up on you.

What do you mean by crazy things? What has she done? Does that sound like someone you’d want to be friends with?

Realistically what’s the worst thing she can do? If you don’t want to speak to her anyone then block and remove her then move on with your life.

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