A
male
age
41-50,
*hathappened?
writes:I'm writing on here again because I've been seeing someone for the last two months and after things took a turn to become serious I'm now getting bad vibes from her. She is in the process of going through a divorce, (been separated since September) and we haven't spoken since last Tuesday....She won't return my calls and rarely returns my text messages....She said she'll talk to me about things by the end of this week...Her lawyer told her to not make us so public and she took down face book pics of us which is fine. But why do I get the avoidance treatment? Should I just chalk it up as a loss or try to see it through?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (7 June 2010): I think I am the first guy she has dated, so yes.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 June 2010): are you the rebound guy?
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A
female
reader, happy24birthday +, writes (7 June 2010):
 See it through. Although she's been separated, the actual final act of divorce stirs a lot of emotion. Give her some time, and hopefully at the end of the week she will have some answers for you.
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A
male
reader, TimmD +, writes (7 June 2010):
 I'd give her some space. With matters like this it's difficult for someone in her position for many reason. The divorce, the lawyer, not wanting to do something wrong, the reality setting in that she's actually getting divorced... it's just a lot. I know you'd just like her to talk to you, but just let her be. Pressuring her will not help things. Just be there if she needs you.
You don't have to look at this as a loss or anything. It's just a tough situation. When she's ready to talk, she'll talk.
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (7 June 2010):
 Ahhh...be patient. She's still into you, or she'd be calling off the separation/divorce. A divorce is like a death, and it's a very emotional time for her. Wait until the end of the week. You're in this together, and she's not avoiding you. if her lawyer told her to not make things public with you, be part of her solution, and don't take offense.
Wait until Friday, and be patient with her. A divorce is a very major thing. It's possible that she's requesting spousal support, which can be undermined if it looks like she's being supported by you.
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