A
male
age
36-40,
*mbiguoushuman
writes:My girlfriend and I have been together since we met in high school. It’s been 6 great years, but the value of our relationship I’d say is that we’re best friends. Our chemistry, our humour, our bond has never failed us. But sexually, we have difficulties. When it comes to sex, I have struggled to stay hard, I can’t maintain an erection. Masturbating, I seem to know my points more than during sex. My partner has recently expressed this problem, and she asked me something that I figure I may consider. She asked about a friend of mine (who’s been flirting with her) if I’d be alright with her exploring. He’s someone that I trust dearly, someone I often swim with at the community pool, and by glance… far more well endowed than myself. I have had some hesitation about it, but my girlfriend has been rather keen on this idea for some time it seems. Often times I’ve caught her masturbating to interracial porn, humping her pillow during the day or at night. I want our love to continue, but I’m unsure where it may lead with this.
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female
reader, !!anonyma!!  +, writes (17 March 2022):
 Are you serious?! This is your partner and friend we are talking about! We are ok with having your partner have sex with your friend! This is obviously not a good idea. And what kind of friend will flirt with their friend's girlfriend? And what kind of girlfriend would ask their partner to have sex with their friend? Are you sure she still wants to be with you and not your friend and if you permit them I am pretty sure this will not go well and you will end up ending your relationship with your girlfriend and your friend. And how do you even ask this question. I swear I can never be ok with sharing my partner with someone else I would rather die than that. So I'd you ask me them I strongly ask you not to let her have sex with your friend.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 March 2022): Such a suggestion is asking for your permission to date, or have sex, with other people. Surely you're not that naive? They've probably already hooked-up by now! All they need is a nod of approval.
You're in your 30's, and you've been together for six years, but you've been together since high school? The math is off. You would be in your 20's, while still in high school. Let's assume you met in high school, and became a couple six years ago. Your sentences are terribly disjointed; so I'll presume you speak French, or another language. Is English your second language?
This isn't a mission of mercy, may I remind you. You're authorizing your friend and significant other to have sex!
Swapping and threesomes usually leads to your mate finding your replacement. If your "girlfriend" is now only a "girl" friend; go ahead and let them have at each-other.
I wouldn't personally recommend pimping your partner out to your friends; but these days, nothing is off-limits! People can justify or have an argument in favor of anything; and can even justify premeditated murder!!! That's our world!
Do you watch, participate, or do you leave them to be alone together?
Is this for your own entertainment, like a live-porn show?
Think carefully about what your girlfriend is suggesting. She must take you for a real sap!
Just remember, if you agreed to it; you can't control how people feel about each-other.
People who really, truly, and deeply love each-other don't take such risks. For argument's sake, of course, there's surely debate about it; but the odds are, they'll go rogue and start doing it with or without permission. Often your mate will start free-lancing, and will see other people. The thought might be a turn-on in your head; but wait until reality hits!
I'll do my best to believe this is a real situation; and you're not just a rascal pulling our leg! Don't expect things to ever be the same afterwards.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 March 2022): Sounds like she is wanting another sex partner and is tired of sex with you, even though she may have some reservations about leaving you. Women are almost always very insecure, and tend to only break up with a man if they already have another guy lined up on the side. The fact she is telling you she wants another man is likely her way of feeling out if that other guy likes her.
On the other hand, she might be one of those "free spirit" types that doesn't really believe in monogamy, and you might be the cuckish type who doesn't mind your woman getting some strange or having a guy on the side. The decision sounds like you need to look at yourself and what you want. You mentioned checking out your friend's package also, so sounds like you might be a homo and not realizing it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 March 2022): Go to the doctor.
Also, she wants to involve another msn and she humps her pillow? Strange
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (11 March 2022): Unless you are a cuckold I don't see how this could be good for you. I agree with Kenny that it may be more peaceful in the long run to break up amicably and then she can go try sex with other guys.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (10 March 2022):
 Is your posted age-range wrong? Because if you met in HS and it's been 6 years, you should be at the MOST in your mid-20's not mid 30's.
Adding a 3 person to your relationship will NOt fix your sex drive NOR your ability to stay hard.
Maybe getting a check-up at the doctor is in order. To figure out of there is a medical reason for the "lack of wood".
Your friendship will be over as you know it if you suggest this. Even if he declines.
Your relationship will be over as you know it if you agree to this.
I think it is possible that SHE wants PERMISSION to cheat with your buddy - to TRY him out and if he is better in bed or whatever, she will monkey-branch from YOU to HIM in a heartbeat.
And how good of a friend is HE really if he flirts with her? Who does that? Unless it's just banter?
Seem like you and your GF are not a great match sexually. Perhaps not so compatible sexually as you are as a couple.
Or you have both grown but grown apart?
This would be a no-go for me. You have to figure out what you want to do.
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A
male
reader, kenny  + ♥, writes (10 March 2022):
 Bringing a third party into a relationship is never a good idea and they more often than not never work out, just have a look over some of the other older posts here on DC and you will see.
It could spell the end of your relationship if she starts to develop feelings for this guy, feelings that are stronger than what she has for you. It could transpire into an affair with them having secret meet ups without you knowing.
By your own admission you say that you are both more like best friends. I think that before you embark on the path of her sleeping with someone else while your still together i think i would be inclined to finish the relationship and just remain good friends. I feel that by doing this you will be saving yourself from a lot of heartache and turmoil.
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