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age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: A good friend of mine has recently been on 2 wks vacation from work, she didn't go anywhere, she stayed in our city and relaxed, saw friend etc.She went back to work on Monday, when I met up with her yesterday (for a coffee after work) she complained that no one at work asked how her leave was, they just said hi as usual. Only one assistant manager asked her. She said that some people seemed not to know she was away at all, and felt left out as some others at her work get asked how their leave was. I told her not to worry about it, do her work and if people do ask then tell, them briefly that the leave was ok, a summary that's all they have to know, and.. that people are busy with their own issues/work/lives,and may honestly forget to ask! and at times may even feel a little jealous she has been on leave and they are not so don't ask. was that the right advice/thing to say? she was quite offended by her colleagues and now thinks they don't like her. So, I was wondering, when you return from leave to work do you tell everyone about it or keep it to yrself,? unless they ask, (which is what I have done in the past) it's her business after all!. Surely her friends are more important than work colleagues empty questions? thankyou Addit: I was going to text her in a few days to see how her week was.
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female
reader, Honeypie  + ♥, writes (12 March 2014):
 I agree, they most likely thought she took time of for personal reasons and most people, UNLESS they are either massively nosy or KNOW you well, will NOT ask. Because it's POLITE not to intrude.
I see no reason to be upset either.
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female
reader, Ciar  +, writes (12 March 2014):
 I have to agree. If she'd planned something interesting and out of the ordinary she'd have talked about it in the weeks and days leading up to the event. People would have undoubtedly asked about when she got back.
She didn't so people assumed that it was either for some personal reason in which case it would have been rude to ask, or that she'd just planned to enjoy some quiet time at home, catch up on laundry, clean out a closet, do some errands, read, and that sort of thing so questions aren't required.
It's funny because when reading this I was thinking that I'm quite the opposite of your friend. Unless I announce special vacation plans I generally prefer it if people dispense with the questions or keep them to a minimum. When they ask if I did anything interesting I feel somewhat pressured by expectations, as if I was supposed to have done something they would consider worthy of telling.
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 March 2014): She didn't do anything, OP. I mean if she went trekking the Sahara or climbing Everest they'd most likely ask her how she got on. But she literally did nothing but take some time off, I don't see what there is to ask.
"Hey, Constance, how was your holiday of sitting on your ass all day reading like? Did you enjoy doing your weekly shopping? How was Neighbours that past two weeks, any good storylines?"
There's literally nothing to ask, so I don't know why she expected anyone to be fascinated.
I don't see any reason for offence at all. If she wants to tell them what's happening in Home and Away now that she's had a chance to see lots of it then she should tell them herself. I mean she literally just had two normal, boring weeks, the only difference is she had no work. What's to ask?
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female
reader, llifton +, writes (12 March 2014):
 I think your response was just fine and dandy. I think she's being a bit in the dramatic side by taking offense to her coworkers not asking. Personally, I couldn't care less if my coworkers asked me how my break was or not. Most of my coworkers probably wouldn't even notice I was gone lol.
It will be nice of you to text her like you mentioned. You sound like a good friend. :)
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 March 2014): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionshe tells me she is on friendly terms with all colleagues, no nastiness, hi, occasional conversation but she doesnt socialise with them.
i agree she may not be known well by them, they are buddies
shes not known as well, they are friends together
i think she should just be polite and not expect anything
if they ask they ask
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female
reader, YouWish +, writes (12 March 2014):
 There could be a number of reasons why that's happened to her. You never mentioned whether or not she is close to her co-workers or not or whether any of them hang out after work or after hours. It may be that none of them are very close, or the fact that her being gone for 2 weeks put strain on her co-workers, so they may be looking for appreciation for covering her vacation, who knows? Thanking someone for carrying the work load goes a long way.
Or the fact that they don't know her well may be what's causing them to mind their own business (with the exception of the assistant manager).
One thing I have learned about work relationships and life is that you'll get offended if your approach to life is to sit back and get mad at people who aren't friendly to you. She may not be as liked at work as she thinks, or that people don't know her enough to feel like talking about it.
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