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female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: My boyfriend slept with my sister the morning our son was born. He hasnt talked to her since I found out about the two of them and he hasnt been with anyone else. But how do I deal with this? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Vivee  +, writes (25 October 2010):
He is an asshole. Don't ever talk to him again. Trust me you don't want this type of man in your life or your child's life. Get away from him immediately... Never forgive someone for doing something like that. I agree with the other reply to you. Know your self worth because you are BEAUTIFUL and you are deserving of someone great.
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female
reader, preciouscrash +, writes (25 October 2010):
my boyfriend too slept with my sister and that was 3 years ago and i have no relationship with my sister she is dead to me and my boyfriend was a terrible immature jerk 3 years ago but he is the most loving faithful man in the world now .. things changed and he is my soulmate my one true love im very happy i did not give up on him.. however the pain does arise and i still get pissed from time to time if my bf and i are at my moms and just the word sister pops up but it is getting easier with time i forgave him not her but i will never EVER forget .. sorry about it being the day your kid was born that sounds even worse than my situation.. just know your not alone and anything is possible good luck take care
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 August 2008): Hey, I know it's been two years after it happened...how are you doing now? He is your son's father..your son should have a father, or at least a fatherly figure. Even though I think you could forgive him, but the trust is ruined...it can never be the same it was before. But do you love him? And do you think he loves you? Everyone makes mistakes...and I do say, his was a huge one, and your sister's even bigger. Does he realise his fault? Is he sorry and realise it's just a huge mistake and realise that the one he loves is you? I've seen this happen to people close to me, but not my boyfriend...but someone else. For that guy, it was a spur of moment thing and he ended regretting it a lot, because he was actually in love with his wife..but made a big mistake. Is this the case for him? As for your sister, I can only imagine the pain that you go through...don't take revenge. It will only hurt yourself more, when you realise that you are the one who's inflicting the pain on her. You will still be the one who's hurt the most. I am sure she's feeling very guilty...it will take a lot of time to repair the relationship. Let her take the first step..it will take some time to forgive you, but just remember, if you never forgive her and just hate her for the rest of your life, how will you feel if something terrible happened to her? You will regret not forgiving her..but let her make the first step. I don't think she'll ever do that to you again, just be careful around her I guess. Surround yourself with good people- people who you know care about you and love you. Remember that your son needs you and loves you too. Good luck...take care.
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female
reader, bammy  +, writes (17 June 2008):
 hey,you're not alone..I myself went through the same thing my so called "boyfriend" slept with my "sister" when I was in hospital heavily pregnant carrying his beautiful twin son's..
I didn't find out until the twins were about 6 months old.He blurted it out when he was drunk & i never felt so hurt in all my life It has to be one of the hardest things i ever had to go through because not only did my "boyfriend" betray me but also my "sister" did too..
They were supposed to be the two closest people to me who I loved, trusted & respected. its so hard to explain how i felt, the agony of knowing, the anxiety that sets in is so uncontrolable especailly when you have pregnancy hormones racing its so unfair, its disrespectful!!
It never goes away honey,I tried to get through it as best I could, Tried to believe that he'd never do it again so I worked hard to keep it together for our children but I waisted 5 years trying to regain the trust.It was never repairable constant fights & shouting matches just got worse & worse. it eventually led to violence..
He was drinking heavily & got extremely violent to the point I ended up having to get a barring order for the safety of myself & my children...
As for my sister?...took me a very long time to forgive her, i didn't speak to her for nearly a year but when we finaly got talking we both held eachother & sobbed our hearts out she told me everything & I told her exacly what she'd put me through & how i felt, that cleared the air for me in a big way..
Its something i finally got over but it'll never go away my twins are nearly 8 now & I still think of it & the hurt & pain it caused but u know what??....
There is light at the end of the tunnel,it takes time, they say time is the greatest healer & it worked for me...
You'll be pleased to hear that I eventually met someone very special which I thought wouldn't happen...He's fantastic with the children & looks after us all really well...
I feel very lucky because If i didn't get the barring order I wouldn't hav met my current parter so i do believe things happen for a reason...
Were getting married in 3mths time ive got my 2 little page boys & my sister is my bridesmaid, we're closer than ever now so it just goes to show that blood is thicker than water..
Your sister won't ever betray you again because her guilt will be enough punishment but the trust in your relationship will never be the same again..every time you look at him you'll wonder what he's up to....
I wish u all the luck in the world with this hunny its not easy just take day by day... Congrats on the birth of your son he'll be the power of strenth to you x x x
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 January 2007): ny boyfriend slept with my twin sister while i was pregnant with our daughter. they slept together in my home, in my bed, while i was pregnant. I found out when my baby was 1 month old. Needless to say, i broke up with him. He hasnt been around to take care of her , and he knows that i have a son from a previous relationship. and me and that man arent together because he also cheated on me, but knowing that didnt stop him. He never loved me, and doesnt deserve to be with me. YOU should evaluate your self worth. This will continue to torment you, and it wont stop until you do something to make yourself fel right again. Good luck to you, i honestly mean that.
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 December 2006): Your bf is sadly, a man who lacks control, maturity and does not honor you. The trust with you both is shattered and I'm not sure if it's repairable. There is now a child to be thought of and that child does deserve to have it's father in it's life, no matter how he conducts his love life. You need to decide what to do. Leave him and raise this child on your own. Or do you stay and try to work it out. This is a decision you and he need to discuss. Counseling may help you both but is the trust forever broken between you two? How sad.
I am more concerned about 'why' your own sister would have such a moral lapse, that she could even do this to you, a family member! Because of her one act of selfishness and stupidity, she has virtually thrown a whole family into a tailspin. Has she always been a bit of a misguided, competitive, vindictive sister? She needs to be told what she's done and some remorse and accountability should be expressed by her. You not only need an apology but your whole family does. Family is all of our safe haven's, a place where we feel loved and accepted. Family gatherings will from now on..will be forever uncomfortable and everyone will be tip-toeing around and stagnating. This is what your sister's actions have caused. She not only hurt you..she caused a deep pain to all of your family.
All I can say..is what a mess and a tough time for you in light of just having a baby. Sometimes in life, we have to ask ourselves..do we need such bad people in our lives? But she is your sister. I think you and she should try to work this out. She made a horrible, bad choice to do this and you need to know why she would do such a thing to you? I think it's time for you and her to seek some family counselling together and see if you can forgive her. It will be a long term process..don't expect overnight miracles. There is something 'disturbed' in her mind that she could even do this to you. She needs to find out why she even did this. I am so sorry, dear...my heart goes out to you.
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female
reader, Choongalicious  +, writes (11 December 2006):
 Your too good for him. If he can sleep with your sister, than he can sleep with someone else. You and your son don't deserve that. I hope you don't stay together and say it's for the sake of your son. I'm guessing your sister was jealous of you and your relationship, so she wanted to spoil it, but you will find someone who is better for you. I believe in revenge, but I also believe strongly in karma! Good luck
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female
reader, Astrid  +, writes (9 December 2006):
 Well as a Revenful lady whos has deeply read shakespeare I would do this, I would say I forgive him cut ties with my sister and inform all my family friends and relatives about her behaviour even the people at her work or college, I would make sure her reputation gets damaged, second I would find another sweety while I'm absolutely wonderful to your cranky boyfriend and give him the sack whenhe's mad after u. another idea is not talking to either of them again and movin away with the baby(never telling adress to the dad) and start a new darling these people do not deserve u
lots of love, best revenge is to loke happy and fit
take lots of care do not forgive her soon
ciao
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 December 2006): Leave him at once. That is horrible. Allow him a relationship with the child but none whatsoever with you!
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (8 December 2006):
I think the more intersting thing is why would your sister do this... any insight?
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female
reader, Seratuki +, writes (8 December 2006):
 Thats horrible...you've been betrayed twice over by him and your sister...If I were you I would cut ties with this guy, someone who could be so cruel and callous to you isn't worth your time and energy hon.
The birth of your child is supposed to be a day of happiness, seems to me he has tainted it for you by doing this. Like I said, make a life for yourself and your baby fre of this jerk.
As for your sister, I personally wouldn't speak to her again..but seeing as she's your family perhaps you should sit down and speak to her, ask her why she would do this to you, and take it from there...
Best of luck sweetie...
Keep me posted!
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