A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I've been seeing my boyfriend for a little over a year now. One day, he lost his phone at my place. We decided to use my phone to call it hoping to follow the sound of the ringer. When I found it ringing, I noticed that my number was not saved in his phone. I asked him about it but he did not give me a straight answer. I wanted to keep talking about it but he was in a rush and not the best mood.This is really bothering me because he used to alternate between saving my number with my real name and cute pet names but now I'm not in there at all. I'm sure he has my number memorized but we text a lot and it can be quite time consuming to type my entire number in whenever he needs to initiate a conversation. What I don't understand is he has people's numbers saved in his phone that he hates and hasn't talked to for YEARS! Yet, my name has been deleted?Why would he actually delete my number from his phone?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 March 2017): so just came across this post coz I think I'm going through the same situation , so my gf saved my name as just "T" so I asked her why and claims that she was angry at me for something she claims to have forgiven me like 2 months back , I just thought something was fishy ... people who tend to do that are usually cheating
A
male
reader, Bogartspiano  +, writes (18 March 2017):
It's the mirror image of your problem, my girlfriend of 72 walked into my pub with another man, it was total chance, I forgave her. Now I know why she didn't want me to ring her when she was out. So beware baby. She now says stuff like "I'm not married or engaged to you, so I can do what I like.Want to be just good friends etc" I pulled her up about saying that to me good style. I'm 64. She's gone out tonight, on the one night I meet with her, so I'm getting dressed up perfect and find a new girl, I suggest you should do this too. Good luck for the future. P.S. I never cheated on her.
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female
reader, LoveShoudntDestroy  +, writes (4 November 2016):
 In my experience, he doesn't want it to link to things like Google +, secret emails and certain things like (SnapChat and secret Facebooks you don't know about) If your number is an actual "contact" in his phone then it would link you two up together like on google plus be its easy to get caught up. My ex who also was so loving and there for me with the my cute pet name in his phone Saved in the BEGINNING, then they switch it up almost like multiple personalities. They blame you and never take accountability or put real effort into the relationship. They want you on her and guessing what they are doing. It's a form of control. He's either a Narcissist(I recommend looking it up). As soon as I discovered my bf was a narcissist, I was in shock. American culture loves narcissists. Opposite of spiritual. They really are sad and will make you crazy.. If he's not cheating, I would be surprised.The other reason is because he doesn't want the girl he's with at the time to see a girls name pop up, especially not something like "my baby" or "lover". These type of boys(if this does apply to u at all) have addiction to new and exciting and can't really love anyone but themselves. Sounds like my ex-running out the house in a hurry. A real man would say, oh I'm sorry baby I was going to put in a cute name and forgot, let me do that real quick... Or say I don't know let me figure out why it's not showing up. It takes 5 seconds of that to put in a number.If your not worth 5 seconds to him, then what does he think you are worth. Sorry this is so long but when I realized my dude was this narcissist thing I literally was in shock and soo hurt and mad because I didn't know who he as anymore. I confronted him and he ended up moving out the house and out the state with his "friends" ya right. More like friend. Shady. This happened 2 weeks ago and it was right before my birthday and our 3 year anniversary. I just turned 32 and I feel 102 because of finding out he was cheating (I found out he was on plenty of fish and tinder as cheaters usually will make up many profiles on dating sites and have one night stands with whoever as they love to get away with something and know they aren't tied down or being controlled) it's messed up and scary especially for your physical and even mental health. Trust me.I'm a mess, lost my job, my friends and family. I'm soo hurt and broken and I'm an only child and he's now hitting me up to send him money and ciggarettes, sorry I'm getting off topic..It just sounds so familiar to what I went through. It started with little stuff like that and I was so in love and loyal I let my heart take over my head and my spirit (I only wish I was that undying loyal to myself and my soul as I was and still am to him) it's sad that people see love and loyalty for weakness but I'm learning this world is cold and scary especially for being an only child. I hope this isn't your situation but if it sounds at all like he might be a narcissist...get out before you lose yourself completely. You shouldn't be on this website questioning your man, if you are happy. Women have intuition for a reason and we are usually right 99.9% of the time...Really, what does your GUT tell you.. He sounds like he's up to no good...if he's in a hurry to go "wherever" and go do "whatever" is so very important, then address it at another time calmly. If he leaves or turns it around on you, he is a for sure narcissist. They fake love then manipulate and destroy you. Hope he's not a narcissist but there is really not a lot of reasons to delete your name. I mean why did he take the time to go erase it? And why can't he take that time to go and put at least ur real name there. Does not make any sense. And why wouldn't he just save it real quick to make you happy. Such a simple quick easy fix. There has to be a reason, and if he fixes it and it stays saved on there then I would be happy for you. (You can check to see if it's saved by calling his number when your with him-do it right when he gets home so he doesn't have time to change it back to your name. Dumb game I know and it shouldn't get that far but I totally get your worry and frustration and I hope you find happiness, peace and serenity with someone that respects you and your feelings. **Look At Actions Matching Up With All the Promises and Words 4 Who the Person Really is** A lot of people know what to say to get their s/o off their back or get what they want-sex, money, a new phone and then they degrade you right after they get what they want. Hope this helps and sorry it's so long. I'm very heartbroken and broken since the love of my life ditched out on me that I want to share this narcissism info with women so they know that there are many crazy forms of abuse that can not be seen like physical abuse or even heard- like the silent treatment, neglect, withholding love, and gas-lighting is the worst -emotional abuse) God Bless and I wish you the best of luck.Feed Your Spirit. Love Yourself and put your higher power first(God for me and I'm talking to myself to here) bye :)
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A
female
reader, Karaitiana  +, writes (17 January 2016):
I’m still with my partner because I love him too much to let him go, just because he does these things to me I just hope and pray it’s nothing big. And that he still loves me enough to not cheat. Hope and pray everything’s OK otherwise if you’re strong enough let him go because there will be more things to worry about later in the relationship. I’m not strong enough to let him go even though I worry. But it’s up to you. You have a choice to make. Just hope he loves u as much as you love him. But don’t let him play mind games with you. My partners mind games have already messed me up
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A
female
reader, Karaitiana +, writes (17 January 2016):
I think its dodgy, see my man we have two kids together, and have been together for 6years he has a password on his phone but when he was nxt to me i seen my name wasnt saved under my number.He does not know my number off by heart. And when I ask him why is my name not saved but you are best friends is? He tries to ignore me or gets angry and says I’m trying to start argument just so he doesn't have to answer the question. So yes I think it’s dodgy, there liars and cowards, far as I’m concerned there hiding something or they don’t see you as important enough to even bother to save your name. It’s not hard to save your name. It’s a little thing but there could be something else to it. Otherwise y is it so hard just to save it to make u feel beta, it’s not hard to put your name there.
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 March 2011): Actually, sometimes if you have a number saved under two different names, e.g a real name and a pet name, when you call it won't come up with either name so it makes it looked like you havent saved the number. I guess the phone gets confused and doesn't know which name to use!!
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A
female
reader, Anonymous 123  +, writes (10 March 2011):
 My friend had the same problem with her bf. When she confronted him, he came up with some stuff like...I have your number embedded in my memory. Why should I save it?? I remember this because I thought it was one of the best fake answers ever!!
When I told my boyfriend about this, he said that many guys don't save their girlfriend's numbers on their phones because it could happen that their friends/family have access to the phone and these guys don't want their girlfriend's number saved, to avoid any questions being asked. Maybe that could be it.
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female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (10 March 2011):
 I don't see the big deal either, really. Unless he never calls because he can't remember your number.
But I do find it odd.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 March 2011): i dont save my girlfriends number on my phone cause its already stored to my head. but it doesn't change anything. i still love her the same way. so don't think too much about it. just look on the brighter side of it, he knows your number well enough to not save it. :) smile now...
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A
female
reader, birdynumnums +, writes (10 March 2011):
 I'd look at #3 a bit closer.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 March 2011): Sorry I think this is dodgy. There is no good reason not to have your number saved. You need to sit down and talk about this...listen to what he has to say, but I can't imagine there's anything he could say that would make you feel better about this...it's a bit strange and something I've never come across before. It may be one of his "quirks". At the end of the day you're the one in the relationship so you should know if there's a true reason to be concerned...I hope for your happiness' sake, there isn't. Good luck xx
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A
female
reader, largentsgirl89 +, writes (10 March 2011):
 Is it possible that he has those peoples numbers saved so if they call or text him he knows who it is so he doesn't answer?
There are so many different connotations as to what him deleting your number from his phone could mean, I honestly don't know what he could mean by that.
1. If your phone number is that long, why wouldn't he save it?
2. Since your his gf, he should have your number saved in their anyway just so he can have easy access.
3. My son's bio father did the same thing to me, but that was so his 12 year old girlfriends didn't know that he was talking to me.
Ask him. If he says it isn't a big deal, then ask him to put your number in his phone if it isn't such a big deal.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 March 2011): He has your number memorized, he doesn't need to keep it on his phone. It's not a major thing. He still phones you and texts you, right? I honestly wouldn't read too much into it.
Are you feeling insecure in this relationship for some other reason? Has anything else changed?
If it's still bothering you, ask him about it again, when the two of you are relaxed and having fun. Don't be accusatory, make it casual. It'll probably transpire that he deleted it by mistake, and doesn't need to re-enter it because he knows it off by heart.
Unless something else is bothering you about the relationship, don't make a great big mountain out of this little mole hill.
I wish you a happy, healthy and peaceful life.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (10 March 2011):
 No biggie, like you said, he has it memorized and apparently doesn't find it difficult to type it in when he needs to. Don't sweat the small stuff.
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