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Is this appropriate conversation between a father and daughter?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Family<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (12 February 2021) 9 Answers - (Newest, 15 February 2021)
A female Canada age , anonymous writes:

do you think its appropriate for dad to tell his adult daughter in her twentys that he use to change her diapers and when he gets older she can change his

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A male reader, kenny United Kingdom + , writes (15 February 2021):

kenny agony auntI agree with the other aunts here, I think he said this in jest, and I don't think there was anything inappropriate here.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (15 February 2021):

If you had any sense of humor you would have responded to his dad joke with: "No dad that's the nursing homes job."

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A reader, anonymous, writes (14 February 2021):

Oh that's one of the stalest and corniest of all dad-jokes!

If you only knew just how old that antiquated-quip is! It has been passed-around for ages!

He was just trying to be funny, sweetheart! It's not that funny, but it might be a reality someday. Lighten-up, my dear!

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (14 February 2021):

I think he must have meant the saying that we are born as babies then we grow to become strong as adults the we grow old and become like babies again. I admit it is an uncomfortable conversation but nothing to lose your sleep on it. So best forget it.

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A female reader, Ciar Canada + , writes (13 February 2021):

Ciar agony auntI agree with the others. He likely did change your diapers, at least once in a while, and I suspect it was said in jest.

Frankly, I think even asking this question is a bit ridiculous.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2021):

Hi

I think it is a bit of humour not tasteful but quite often roles reverse with parents, and children end up doing just that. Hopefully not but as parents inevitably age or just get poorly. Maybe he did change your diapers when you were a baby, good on him.

I assume you are the daughter? this I find more odd, a grown woman in her 20's feels the need to ask a lot of strangers if this is appropriate language.

Do you not understand or even know your fathers character or sense of humour? are you a very sheltered woman, or is something more sinister/serious going on that really brings you on here?

Your age group need to spend a bit less time on their smartphones and get an awful lot better at studying the real clues and body language codes that come in flesh, read the eyes, the frowns, the corners of a mouth.

I suppose it depends on what your own interpretation of the word 'Appropriate' means to you.

Appropriate means a lot of things to me,

Is it making you feel like there was a sexual innuendo within it?

Is it because you were embarrassed?

Could mean a lot of things but unless you clarify a little bit better, it is not easy to answer.

A lot of younger people just don't have social skills anymore and appear to rely on what social media tells them is appropriate or not appropriate, and have not learnt essential personal skills like judgment

and savvy knowledge learnt real life.

Is it appropriate?

What makes you question this comment?

Did it hurt you in anyway?

be specific.

Obviously there is something amiss somewhere here.

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A female reader, mystiquek United States + , writes (13 February 2021):

mystiquek agony auntWithout knowing the father I'd say this was all said in a joking matter. I am guessing you are reading far too much into the comment?

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A female reader, Youcannotbeserious United Kingdom + , writes (13 February 2021):

Youcannotbeserious agony aunt"Appropriate" seems like an odd term to use in relation to such a conversation. You obviously DON'T feel it is "appropriate", otherwise you would not have written in and asked the question. I would not call it "inappropriate"; I might, however, call it "uncomfortable".

You are familiar with your father's personality so will know whether this was said in seriousness (perhaps because he is worried about getting older) or in jest (because he is trying to get a rise out of you). Or perhaps he is just "feeling you out" to see whether you are on board for looking after him when he is unable to look after himself?

If this is something he does regularly, then you need to think of a way to answer him next time he raises the subject. Are you an only child? If not, say something like "we (as in you and your sibling(s)) will work something out". If you are an only child, you can always say something like "I will do what I can" or "I will do what I think is best".

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (13 February 2021):

Honeypie agony auntYes, since it was without a doubt done with a sense of humor.

What the dad said was - I took care of you when you were unable to take care of yourself (baby) so you can take care of ME when I'm unable to take of myself (due to age).

Personally, I can't see anything inappropriate about this.

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