A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I was wondering why aunts and uncles are more willing to answer questions that are related to below belly button , thresum, Fwb, F buddies, but are less likely to help on some serious questions regarding other issues? Have we gotten some preferences here or they are just expert on that sort of questions? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, N91  +, writes (9 June 2016):
 I tend to answer whatever question I feel like I can give a helpful input on, if I don't then I don't try to force myself to.
I also think everyone has different interpretations of a serious question.
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (7 June 2016):
 I would be curious first of all to know which the serious questions would be. Could you give us an example of what qualifies, in your opinion, as a serious question ?
This is a romance and relationship advice site , for the most part , so all the questions, in a way, are equally futile or equally serious.
In the greater scheme of things,... it's all fluff, even the " serious " stuff. Divorce, betrayal, unwanted pregnancy, family feuds , you name it.
I could answer you ( or all the askers of "serious " questons ) : try being in Syria under the bombs. Try being homeless , starving, with nowhere to go. Try having terminal stage cancer.
THEN, you have a problem. ( In which case, though, I doubt the person would even think of consulting an Agony Aunt site for advice ).
On the other hand , though, all questions are equally serious for the person who posts them. Otherwise they would not have posted.
The 13 y.o. that has an unrequited crush for the class beau is as heartbroken as the 50 y.o. woman who is abandoned after a 30 years long marriage. Maybe more, because she has not developped yet resilience and general life skills to deal with setbacks.
So, while generally the Aunt will encorage the teen to stay positive , keep it light and avoid drama, at the same time it would be wrong , and not in the spirit of this site, to dismiss or ignore the " lighter " questions just because we know there's worse, or we have seen worse.
Of course there's worse. Ther's always worse. Even worse than your " serious " questions- which are serious to you, since you are personally involved, same as an FWB question is serious for another poster.
I also notice - but maybe I am imagining it, OK- that you sound annoyed and resentful that here there are so many questions related to " below the belly button ": Well... what did you expect, really. This is a love and relationship advice site, and love and relationship nowadays include feelings... AND lots of sex and sexual dilemmas. The below the belly button area is very important- whether one likes it or not.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 June 2016): I answer questions that I can share a common-experience and/or I have had much exposure to. I am experienced, well-read, and an educated person. This site is not for offering professional-advice. There is bias in every advice site you'll ever find; because you're seeking opinions. Even licensed-professionals will offer only general advice online. They will provide their credentials to indicate their opinions are based on research, or their professional training. This isn't that type of site.
People base much of their advice on personal-experiences, and some may actually be licensed-professionals; but avoid trying to analyze people based on a post. We do not attempt to offer professional-counseling on this site; although we might suggest that you seek it.
We offer comfort, humor, and straight-forward discussion. You can offer your rebuttal freely, and even seek individual attention. You can even offer advice as an uncle yourself, if you wish. Or share your thoughts in an article.
People will read and relate to your story.
Perhaps you haven't noticed the many categories of advice you have to chose from. If you look under the heading "Top Agony Aunts and Uncles," or "About Us;" you'll see there is a plethora of topics you can chose. There are many different aunts or uncles from whom you may seek advice or opinion. Each has his or her unique style and delivery.
Any advice that doesn't suit your taste, can simply be ignored; or read for your entertainment. Sometimes people have wild over-the-top questions, or want to share outrageous experiences. We offer them the forum to do that, and they deserve feedback if they seek it. To help them sort things out on a human and more empathetic level.
Some are already in therapy, and would like to just vent their feelings without being hit with a lot of psycho-babble. They can be totally anonymous and reach-out to hear from someone who relates on a more down-to-earth and humane
level. Many answers and some fantastic advice come from anonymous readers, who can really spice it up. We all learn from you, and each other here.
Share your thoughts if you have an experience you think others can relate to. It's very therapeutic. Just be able to handle it, when readers don't like your answers or opinions.
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A
female
reader, Andie's Thoughts +, writes (7 June 2016):
 Not so much a bias as just things people feel more able to give advice on. A lot of questions require common sense solutions, which can result in many aunts and uncles being able to respond, as no real experience or "qualifications" are needed. Some questions need answers from people who know the country's laws well enough to give a detailed answer, but a lot of people don't feel comfortable with that because they don't know the person's full legal situation just by a post online. Same goes for medical questions; without in-person knowledge of the legal/medical situation, well-intentioned advice could do more harm than good. It's hard to conclude why a question may not have received (m)any answers without having an example.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (6 June 2016):
 I think if you look at the threesome & FWB type of question, there are many replies. Why? Because typically the aunts responding are posting many many answers saying "DON'T!"
Serious questions regarding other issues? Sometimes the poster doesn't offer enough information to give a good answer.
Is that what happened to you?
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female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (6 June 2016):
 First, I agree with SVC, no one here claims to be experts or professionals. I think we ALL answer those we feel we CAN give advice to, often times something we have some insight into or experience with.
I don't think uncles and aunts are more willing to answer certain question rather than others.
Sometimes OP give vague questions and don't get many, if any answers.
It's kind of simple people answer what they feel they can help with.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 June 2016): I couldn't agree more, I think the aunt's and uncles on this can be very harsh when people come for advice it can be below the belt at times, is there any need in making a person feel any worse than they do already and I do agree they only answer certain questions.
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A
female
reader, mystiquek + ♥, writes (6 June 2016):
 I've been here for almost 10 years. People answer what they are interested in, what they have experience in for the most part. When it comes to serious questions, they may not get as many responses because folks may not feel comfortable answering questions that they feel are out of their league.
I steer away from medical questions even though I have a medical background because I'm not a doctor. I try not to ever give legal advice because I'm not a lawyer. I don't want to give someone wrong/bad advice so why answer something I'm not trained or skilled in?
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (6 June 2016):
 We are not professionals, folks answer what they want to answer and what they feel competent to answer.
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