A
female
age
30-35,
*ho
writes:okay heres the thing! I'm scared to death because my boyfriend is stalking me.. he loves me so much. He cries every time we part. Okay it may seem sweet but it gets annoying. He wants to marry me, and we have only been togetehr for 2 weeks.. he says I'm the one for him and I have a feeling I can never let him down. He is crazy.. I'm scared that if i broke up with him he would do somthing to me or somthng.. you can never know what one would do for love.. please give me a way to break up with him slowly.. he is insecure and clingy and he is afraid of losing me.. he said it's okay to cheat on him but never to leave him... he wants to be with me 24 hours.. I always wanted someone to love me.. however I think I got the extreme and cannot handle it.. Ii don't love him the way he loves me.. and I need to break up with him before it gets more serious!! PLEASE somone help me and tell me a good way to break up without hurting him :S
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broke up, insecure, stalking Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 September 2007): There is never a good, easy way of breaking up with someone who loves you.I'm with someone now and we've been together for 1 year and 6 months. We both love eachother very much, but we've always said that if things don't work out for one of us, to always tell the other.We'd like to stay friends also. Just tell him you don't want to be in a relationship right now and ask if you can be friends.
A
male
reader, Escalaya  +, writes (31 August 2007):
 Just break up with him. And the moment he starts pressuring you into a position where you're uncomfortable than tell an authoritive figure right away. This would mean a Cop, Teacher, school councilor, or parent. Do NOT let this slip by thinking it will stop. Remember, the longer things go on, without him being in trouble, the more bold he'll get.Best of luck, take care, and be safe.
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A
male
reader, duce00 +, writes (31 August 2007):
 Sorry you ended up with a guy that whos a total looney. Regretfully it does happen. Thats why theres restraining orders, police officers, parents, mental health units, psychiatrists, anti-psychotic medicine etc.
Let qualified people deal with this poor boys illness, your not anywhere near capable of helping him.
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A
female
reader, lachick85 +, writes (31 August 2007):
I agree with Frank. You need to take action now, and not do it "slowly." Getting help from others is a great idea.
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A
female
reader, cheerycharlie +, writes (31 August 2007):
 i agree, he seems very possesive and nneds to calm down. just tell him he need sto calm down and slow down the relationship, because you dont like the clingyness, it seems quite progressed now as to how far he has taken it, you should have stopped it as soon as you felf uncomfortable. i think he maybe doesnt always get girlfriends or simpy needs some one to love hu luvs him aswell. it needs to end quick befor it gets any worse. be gentle when breaking up with him because he is an emotional wreck! just tell him he took it too quickly or that you need some space or you have too much going on in your life too have a bf. i sugest you dont let him think it is his fault because he is very emotional.
if he cries dont giv in too him as his feeling will soon fade and still be friends wiv him, and speak to him so he feels secure. you need to end this quick, you cud end up in danger
all the best XxXxX
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A
female
reader, cho +, writes (31 August 2007):
cho is verified as being by the original poster of the question he does not go to my school.. he is 20 years old and i am 16/ and no im not his first gf.. but im the first that gave him affection and not just wanting him for his body like all the other gurls did.. his parentts wana meet me as well.. the thing is im travelling in a week to finish my skool in another country then MAYBE comin bak to england.. he lives like 1.30hrs away from me in my house in england.. and he visits me twice a week..
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A
male
reader, Frank B Kermit  +, writes (31 August 2007):
 Firstly talk to your parents, and his if possible. This relationship needs to end now. He sounds unstable. It is not love, but possesiveness. If he continues to pursue you, look into speaking to your principle (assuming you go to the same school), about boundaries.
Are you his first gf? That might factor into it a bit, but this unhealthy.
-Frank B Kermit
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