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I'm pregnant & he isn't taking it seriously & is even messing about in txt with my mate! Help!

Tagged as: Dating, Pregnancy, Teenage, Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (25 August 2009) 4 Answers - (Newest, 25 August 2009)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

hey i need some advice.

iv been with my fiance for a year, im pregnant with his baby and we moved into our own house 3weeks ago my bf has lied to me in the past and iv always been worried hes cheatin on me as he hides his phn and deletes msgs, one nite i decided to look at his msgs, he had msgs frm a girl saying "are u still meeting me later, bring condoms ok" and he replyed saying "im not sure when my breaks are yet, cnt get protection tho" this was during work. i read msgs frm another girl proper flirtin with each other saying things like "we both fancy the pants of each other, if u want it to happen it can" thn a reply saying "its jst a fantasy itll nva happen" i txt both girls and the 2nd girl turned out to be my mate!! she swore nothing happened and its not what it looks like. the other girl who said bout condoms said she dint no i was preg and thy nva met up. i asked my bf and he said he was winding up my mate cus he new she liked him and said the condom girl wudnt leave him alone and he was stupid. i was so upset, i told my mates and thy told me my mate had told them she fancied him and warned her off doing anything but thy nva thought she wud. i snapped my bfs sim card, he doesnt hav a phn and net anymore. i decided to giv my bf one last chance bcus of the baby. i told my mum and she blamed it on me saying "hes a young lad, if ur not givin him anything hes gna cheat" so i dnt want to move bk with my mum as i hate her now. i cant claim any benifits as my bf works over 24hours a week and earns over £16,000 a yr. i dno if he met up with the girls or jst was stupid txting them. thy all deny it. but i really cant get over wht him n my mate did, even if it was to wind her up. i feel so hurt and dnt trust any of my mates now and i dont trust him. we are happy atm but im not sure hes learned his lesson :( help!

View related questions: condom, fiance, flirt, moved in

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A reader, anonymous, writes (25 August 2009):

Sorry - I can't understand the question if there is one. Could you write it in proper English? That was total gibberish to me.

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A female reader, karasu10 United States +, writes (25 August 2009):

karasu10 agony auntwhat i've learned from my experiences is that the technology today allows us all to be unfaithful. if he texting other girls saying that, regardless if he acted upon them or not, is very disrespectful to your feelings and you being the mother of his unborn child.

if you truly care about him, try and talk to him first when u discover things such as inappropriate text messages. dont blow up on him.

i agree with Honeypie that you both need to grow up. i am only 18 and i am pregnant right now too. being so young i need to grow up for my child. both of you need to do the same.

right now you need to focus more on what needs to happen before the baby get here. put your heart aside. if he decides to be unfaithful, leave him. you have a priority right now and its not him. baby comes first!

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (25 August 2009):

Honeypie agony auntWow, That was HARD to read, is that like net speak or text English?

Anyways, short of the long is you two have trust issues, and are soon to be parents. If you two don;t start working on things NOW, you will both be miserable.

You both need to grow up.

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A male reader, celestial Canada +, writes (25 August 2009):

Without trust there can be no love... Being young don't give him the right to cheat on you... You should leave him. Find yourself a good man, that will respect you and listen to you.

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