A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Ive been seeing a lovely guy for 5 months. very complicated situation, we are both going through longterm breakups but have become very close. he has told me he loves me and has fallen in love with me. Things have been wonderfully intense but sometimes it feels cold, then he suprises me by heating things up again. when i think hes not interested I get a text or a phone call that are very affectionate. A couple of weekends ago things were going well and I introduced him to some friends for the first time. Over the course of the evening I noticed what seemed to me to be outright flirting with my friend. they were laughing, he was laughing at all her jokes and faced her during dinner, his leg was pretty much touching hers and she seemed to be flirting back. all in front of me. neither made an effort to correct it. I invited her to mine to sleep over and he reiterated and said yes come over to her. I felt jealous and it quite upset me but I tried not to let it show. that night he stayed with me and the following night he came over for dinner and stayed with me. She is married happily. Am I overreacting? is he trying to make me jealous because he likes me or did they genuinly have a spark? he gets a little jealous of my male friends so maybe its a way of paying me back? was she flirting back or just trying to make a good impression. Ive not really seen this with her before. was he just trying to be nice and accepted by my friends? Im worried about us all going out again without her husband there. help....
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (16 May 2010):
 They have some chemistry and they can click. If you feel strongly about it, then you should talk to him ,let him know your limits and boundaries.
Or you don't mention it and think of it as a one off thing .The next time , it may not be the same and may not happen again.
It is also possible that it was pay back time, to let you feel what is was like when other males joked and flirted with you .
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 May 2010): I think men flirt because they don't really know how to act. And your friend was probably just being polite because she didn't know what to say in return! It's very difficult to see someone you love flirt but if he knows it's affecting you it may well end up ruining your whole relationship.
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