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I'm in love with my ex's brother!

Tagged as: Family, The ex-factor, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (29 May 2012) 1 Answers - (Newest, 30 May 2012)
A age 30-35, * writes:

I fell in love with my ex boyfriend's brother. We became good friends while I was with his brother. I broke off with his brother about two years ago because he has a really difficult and selfish character. Even though it was hard for him when I left, we ended up in good terms. I started to have feelings for him while I was still in a relationship with his brother, but kept it a secret for some time. It was really difficult because I lived with his brother and then he moved right next door, we started to hang out a lot, and thats when i started to have feelings for him, but they were not as strong as they are now. Time passed, I had a couple of not so seruous relationships, but we always stayed as good friends, hanging out once in a while, and there was always a romantic and sexual tension between us. Then we became coworkers and thats when everything exploded. One day we made love, we acted out normally, but i was totally in love, I noticed he was the person I wanted. We had some texting. flirting, and the friendship continued. Then it happened again, i wrote a love letter for him, he was touched i told me he thinks he will never meet a woman like me, but that his brother will hate him for being with me. I tried to stop, but we still flirt, see each other too much since we work together. There has been some drama between us, which makes me sad because I love him too much, and i wanted the road between us to stay clean. I dont know what to do, i tried to stop talking to him but working together makes it hard, and also makes me too sad, Hes really my friend and I will miss him too much, his jokes, his laugh, his way of being nice and humble, his selfless way of treating everybody, we have such an incredible chemistry, im afraid i will never give up on him in my heart. Its too scary and I am mad at myself since we we first meet( I was only 16) he was flirty and nice with me but I ignored him and ended up with his brother. I really need an advice, Ive been too depressed lately since the other day we kissed and made out, it was romantic, sad and sexy, it leaves me wanting for more, but It cant be. Help!!!!

View related questions: co-worker, depressed, fell in love, flirt, my ex, text

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A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland +, writes (30 May 2012):

aunt honesty agony auntYou need to realise that nothing is ever going to come from this. I doubt he would be willing to make you his girlfriend as it would tear apart his family and he would probably lose his brother. So you need to accept that it's either you get over him now or you prolong the pain and sadness when it comes to this guy.

You should never have allowed yourself to get close to his brother in the first place. As your ex's brother he should never have flirted with you either, you are both wrong here. I am sure you do not want to come in between two brothers. I know you do not want to give up on him, but do you really want to destroy a family? Because that is what will happen if you two are caught.

I know you have to work together and it is really hard on you. But you can cut out all other contact. Be civil to him at work but nothing more. Yes off course you will miss him to begin with, yes it will make you sad, but you will get over it and move forward. You just need to stop all contact outside of work and move forward with your life. If you don't do this you are just going to prolong your pain and probably fall for him even deeper if you keep this up.

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