A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Okay... Well... Here's the thing. I met this great guy six months ago who is cute, funny, smart, great personality, everything I was looking for in a guy. The only problem is, I'm in a relationship, an he's married with three kids. He told me he was no longer on the same page as his wife, she had told him she didn't love him, he was pretty sure he was going to leave her, and that he was very strongly attracted to me. He would call me pet names, give me hugs, give me compliments... All things that my boyfriend felt weren't "normal". We used to chat for hours online and play games together, but never did anything physical or sexual beyond brief hugs. Then, one day, one of his neighbors saw him giving me a ride home after a community meeting we had both been to. They told his wife, who started having him followe and watched, and started trying to read his e-mails and Facebook. She even tried to chat online with me while pretending to be him, and posted things like "I can't believe you're so boring." on his Facebook wall.Then, over Christmas... Everything changed. She started posting cutesy things on his FB wall of how much she loved him and how adorable the little pranks he pulled on her were. He stopped talking to me on MSN and even deleted the game we played together online. I've seen him twice since then, and each time he's still expressed an interest in me, but has been more subdued. Apparently, she still has him watched. He's also announced that e's moving, but would say no more. He started up the game we played again, but hasn't made a move in almost a week and a half. His mother is sick, and his wife has taken over his FB page. He also announced he would not be returning to the community club, which hurts as I may be leaving that area for good in August and nay never see him again.My boyfriend knows I care for this man, and is all right with it. He sees that we have been drifting apart for some time, and is upset that I am so depressed because of this friend.My question is, was I duped? Would I be better off forgetting him? I feel like I've been slapped in the face.
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 February 2011): completely agree with doublejack! Be grateful that nothing ever really happenned between you two. It would just cause you suffering, since 99.9% never leaves their wives no matter how terrible the marriage is.. there are way too many factors involved and plus, even if he was to leave her, your life could be turn into hell anyway. So, just move on, focus on your bf or even better, on yourself! :)
A
male
reader, doublejack +, writes (11 February 2011):
Yes, I have to say you were duped. The vast majority of married men will not leave their wife and family. They just want a little action on the side, and will say just about anything to get it.
It is in everyone's best interest if you move on emotionally from this guy. He was never anything more than bad news.
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