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female
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anonymous
writes: Hi thereI am in a dilemma, over a boy (shock horror) I have been friends with him for about 8 years, not mega close- but catch up occasionally, I saw him a couple of years ago before he was to go to Australia with his girlfriend and he asked me drunkenly why I hadn’t contacted him again after our previous meeting as he thought we were going to get together. He then went off to Australia and I kept in touch a bit but nothing more than the odd e-mail-but I have always liked him more than “just friends” but he has mostly been with someone. He recently came back and we caught up and I realised how much I still like him. He mentioned I looked great a few times, but he’s quite flirty anyway. He is coming to stay at my house soon and we are going out (he is now single). I know that if there was ever a chance to tell him I like him it would be then but am a bit scared he will freak out. Any advice on judging the signs as to whether he likes me as more than a friend or not would be greatly appreciated?!!
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female
reader, missbunbury  +, writes (17 March 2006):
 I can share a really positive experience which may help you build up the courage - my boyfriend and I were close friends for six years, and we finally got together three years ago. I can honestly say that friendship has proved the best possible foundation for us, we are sickeningly happy! We both hid our feelings for a long time, but we don't have any regrets as we suspect that if we'd got together earlier, we might not have had such a great friendship to build on. I think you and your friend are in the perfect position to have the same happiness, and I wish you all the best with the Big Talk - honestly, that's the scariest bit, and I know you're going to do brilliantly!
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 March 2006): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks to the agony aunts that have responded. You have really helped me, I think I will have to tell him as I know he wont be single for long. I will update you on the outcome.(as long as I dont chicken out!) I do agree though if i dont say something now that I will always wonder. Scary prospect!!
Thanks again for your help :-)
x
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A
female
reader, Aunt Audrey +, writes (16 March 2006):
 There must be a connection of some kind for you to have stayed in contact all this time albeit sporadically.
If he is coming to stay with you and you have plans to go out, see how it goes, if you still feel the same way then go for it and ask him stright out if he thinks you could be more than just friends. If you don't ask you will never know and will probably always ask yourself what might have been if only you'd had the courage to ask when you had the chance.
He doesn't sound like the type to stay single for long, so get in there while he's single.
Who knows he could be asking himself the same thing, and like you lacks the courage to ask in case he loses your friendship, the time he hinted that he thought you might get it together says the thought has crossed his mind. You don't say how you reacted to this, but could your reaction have put him off mentioning it again?
So ask him, what have you got to lose?
Good luck!
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A
female
reader, bridget +, writes (16 March 2006):
 Hey There,
Hope I can shed some light in your tricky but hopeful situation..
This boy seems to really like you, he can trust you, have faith in you, even give you confidence tips and he seems like a really great friend.. And that, My friend, is a great ingredient for a Relationship on the romantic level.
You said yourself he was quite flirty at times, maybe just take things on a friendly basis when he comes to stay at your house for the time being and see how things go..
You could try to drop tiny little hints to get him to catch the drift, and who knows, maybe he already knows!!
Just remember that if there is supposed to have been a bit of romance it will happen then.
You both have no worries, Eg: No relationship at either side, just the two of you, so if anything has to happen, It will happen then..
You shouldnt worry too much about him freaking out if you tell him that you like him alot, at least he would understand how you feel, and that is also important..
Please dont feel bad if he doesnt feel the same, although by the way that you explain the situation, I doubt that very much.
Good Luck
Jacqueline
x
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