A
male
age
41-50,
*ynnerxxx
writes:Ok I am in a bit of a problem and not sure how to handle this, I am not new to the dating game but this is one of the more complex problems I have had.We will start from when we first met, I met my girlfriend online one year ago (a few days ago was our one year anniversity) and we for the most part are happy. I am not a rich man due to many problems (mostly family a move i had to make etc etc) and she is not a rich woman (lost her job due to being sick) so we never wanted money from each other for all these crazy things, so she is not a gold digger and in my whole year money does not impress her: even on her birthday when i spent $500 on her she was quite upset i spent my money on her and said she needs "nothing but my love"Now the problem started about 4 months ago, small little things but being we met online, i am very..leery to the online guys she chats with. not that i don't trust her but her ex in example when she broke up with him a few months before she met her, called her (i answered) and he bashed her to all hell and called her every name in the grave and he then nearly stalked her. the cops where called and such but now all of a sudden he is back in the picture: calling her, texting her and emailing her with little "i love you" tags but always puts "lol" at the end like he is joking..she never really tells me about these letters and, i find out my own way (we share the same computer)When i question her about this, she gets very pissed off at me telling me that it is none of mine and who she talks to is her own personal thing. Very well i say this man stalked her, threated her, cursed her out and she forgives him..fine. not like he lives close so i feel no threat, he lives a few states away after all. but the problem from there has advanced, She started playing some online stupid chat game and for the last 2 months now, ontop of him calling her and contacting her, she has been ignoring me. She spends HOURS on this thing and when i ask wtf is going on, she gets pissed again saying these friends of hers are her friends. I am not aloud to have female friends you see, if i do she rips me apart over it, but it is fine she has male friends who, call her, text her, email her, send pictures but if i have one its hell to pay.so ontop of ignoring me and everything else, she went home to florida (where her other ex boyfriend lives who tried to get her to "go on a business date" with her). in total for the last 23 days we have spoke no more then 3 hours. total, 3 hours out of 23 days. she is ALWAYS on this game, and always out someplace without a phone, i finally questioned her about the game and she said "it is mostly female friends she has intrest in and there is no harm in it because they are just girls" now, in this day of age "just girls" don't mean anything because girls date girls and boys date boys, its how the world is and i have nothing against it.in closing, from all i gather she is still talking to the stalker ex, talking to this chick on this chat thing who is married and her husband and her would "love to meet my girlfriend" and my girlfriend, while hasn't met them seems all fine and dandy with this, she obsesses with this game more then me, and if i question anything she does lately, or complain i dislike it, or would like her to slow down, she rips me apart and storms out the room. There is no physical cheating to my knownledge: she has not met anyone but all the signs that she is doing something shady is there..so my question..how do i handle this? i been considering many options..my friends are no real help and just don't get it, but in todays world of computers, cybering, and all the other crazyness i have real concern.sorry for the long explaining there hope no one's eyes bleed! and thanks for any replys.
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broke up, her ex, met online, money, stalking, text Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Synnerxxx +, writes (25 December 2008):
Synnerxxx is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank's for the replies i am going to more then likely talk to her on her return (which is new years eve..) and see where this goes, still seeing what others think as well before i decide what to say..
also she believes in the "inner good" of people and "not everyone has bad intentions" which is true...but alot do.
A
female
reader, BRITTBABII2 +, writes (25 December 2008):
I Think that u should really put your foot down dnt let her storm out the room and if i was u i would get some females friends and when she tries to get on u about it get on her rite back n dnt she know once a stalker always a stalker
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A
female
reader, boo22  +, writes (25 December 2008):
 Hi there, every doormat says welcome. Put your foot down with her or finish it. End of story I'm afraid. Who could live like that together? Good luck.
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A
male
reader, Griffo  +, writes (25 December 2008):
 Look mate I only read half of that but I'd just say wake up smell the #%¥* roses and tell her your not dumb and if she wants to not give you any attention any more then it's over and ask get to leave or leave yourself. She's just ducking you around by laying the pressure on you this makes you feel guilty to ask. So be strong get tough and if she's threatening your heart threaten her to leave so you can just move on.
If she's really tar into you she would communicate about it.
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