A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hello all. my problem is that i am dating a guy who was also my bf in school. but we broke up in a matter of days at that time. he had a crush on a girl who happened to be my friend ( good friend). So, since me n my bf were not talking, i was not bothered. in college, i totally lost contact with both of them. a year earlier, i renewed my contacts and i learnt that my bf still had feelings for me. we started dating and grew close. one day, my bf was going through my fb profile and saw that i am friends with that girl. he asked me why i am friends with her and i said that because she was my good friend at school. he asked if i am in touch with her , then, i said only a bit, not much. he told me to remove her from my friend list. i was surprised and asked why. he said that when i was not in touch with any of them, they were on talking terms. he had her picture from school days in his personal diary and his friend saw the picture and told that girl about it and said that my bf loved her. that girl told all this to her then bf who called up my bf and fought with him. my bf got angry with the girl as she did not tell him anything but complained to her bf, instead as my bf was not aware that such a thing had happened. so, he apologized and told her that he won't bother her again. so, this is the reason why my bf wants me to remove that girl. i know that i am not great friends with her now but still, isn't it wrong to do such a thing? i don't understand where is the girl's fault? if i had been i n her place, i would have done the same thing. my boyfriend told me that he will break-up with me if i don't delete that girl from my friend list. i really don't know what to do. i love my bf but he is being wrong and unreasonable. should i break up with him?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 August 2012): hey guys..i am updating this. we sorted out our doubts. thanks for the suggestions.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2012): He broke with me. I am feeling so miserable. Should I just agree with him? Isn't that wrong! I guess I will just stay alone forever. No one loves me.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 August 2012): Just to give you guys more details, i have not slept with him but we have talked about sex and even had orgasms on the phone. Am I a slut to be doing this and then breaking up with him? What do I do if he tells his friends about these things?
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A
female
reader, BondGirl72  +, writes (4 August 2012):
 I would not date anyone who tried to tell me who my friends should be. That is disrespectful to you, and if he is like this now, he will try to tell you what to do in other aspects of your life. Plus, it sounds like he doesn't want you being friends with this girl because it sounds like he either still has interest in her or is not willing to let the past be the past.
If he would break up with you over the fact that you wouldn't delete the girl from your friends list, then he is not worth being with anyway. Relationships are very hard work and that is such a minor thing. If he is that angry over that small of a thing, I don't think your relationship has much of a chance.
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A
male
reader, Xearo  +, writes (4 August 2012):
I think you should break up with him. You are not responsible for his past or his past's mistakes. While I agree partners should support each other, this relationship is new and needs a lot of trust and time before anyone can demand anything.
I do not blame the girl either. The fault is in your boyfriend for showing the picture and even having the picture in the first place. Maybe he want's to live in ignorance but you do not have to pay his price.
Well you say you love him so I don't know if he will let it go at some point. But to use ultimatums seems low and immature at just for fb friends so I am in the favour of breaking up with him.
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