A
female
age
41-50,
*ngel of the north
writes:I have known this man for most of my life and we have always been close as friends, but lately I have started to feel as though it is more than friends. It feels very natural and normal when I am alone with him and my feelings for him are starting to grow and I know he feels the same because he has said so, the only problem is he is married with kids and I am also now a friend of his wife. I know in my head that I should not let it go any further but in my heart I can't let go and I also don't want to stop being friends with either of them. We haven't done anything other than cuddle but I have been on my own now for the last 5yrs and because of the way I feel for him I am getting to a point where I could do something. what should I do? and how do I stop feeling things towards him if I decide I want to stop feeling it Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2010): Infidelity is a CHOICE. You say your head tells you to leave him alone, but you heart won't let him go. Well, your head needs to win this one.
He's married. Taken. UNAVAILABLE. He belongs to another woman. Ask him point blank if he's willing to leave his wife and kids for you. Guaranteed, he won't/wouldn't. He might say he will, but don't believe it.
You need to completely cut off contact with this couple, because if you don't something will eventually happen, especially if he's already stated his willingness. If the wife wants to know why, tell her the TRUTH...that you have feelings for her husband and he was receptive. Then let them work it out. If you truly care about this woman as a friend, you wouldn't dream of doing to her, and her children and family, what you're thinking about doing. And ask yourself how you would feel if another woman cheated with YOUR man. Pretty betrayed and awful, right?
Besides, don't you deserve better than to be the "other woman?" Find someone who can be yours 100%
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 June 2010): Do the right thing and LEAVE HIM ALONE! You will hurt the wife, the kids, him, families on both sides, nyourself and your family if you become :the other woman" and destroy nallm of their lives. Trust me.....my ex-husband of 15 years slept with my best friend who did the same thing you are talking about. Ask my kids if they like all of the therapy they have had to go through to get over the hurt.
Why can't people leave the married man/woman alone? They are married!! That means LEAVE THEM ALONE! They are no longer on thge market. Go find your own!!!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 June 2010): unless you want to be known as a homewrecker and a f@ck buddy then you know what to do. stealing someone elses husband and doing the dirty with him is despicable seeing also that you have befriended his wife. as a family friend to both hb and wife you will commit one of the biggest betrayals. stop thinking with that itch that wants to be scrached byt he married hb, and start thinking about the consequences of the affair if you let this man f@ck you. i know you want it but does it have to be someone elses hb?
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A
female
reader, Carrot2000  +, writes (28 June 2010):
 You have been alone for five years and you are lonely, that's all. If you had a mate of your own you probably wouldn't give this guy a second thought. Instead of fixating on someone else's husband, you should focus your energies on finding a relationship with a man who is SINGLE and AVAILABLE.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (25 June 2010):
It's time to back away. You don't really know how he feels. He, like all the other married men who attempt affair, could be lying just to use you. You need to pull away. To take it further would be to degrade yourself, ruin a marriage, ruin your reputation as a person, lose two friends, cause children pain and finally potentially make yourself so tarnished that no other man will look at you. Pull away now.
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A
male
reader, boydjohn026 +, writes (25 June 2010):
It sounds like to me, you already know what you want. I say be friends with the both of them, but really enjoy yourself with him, but keep yourself distant.
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