A
female
age
30-35,
*mitty babyy
writes:I'm 17. I keep getting caught having sex with my boyfriend by his grandparents. He's 19. Yes he lives with his gparents they need help around the house. His grandmother said tht if we have sex then thts rape. How can this be rape when I'm at a legal age for a girl. She says if this happens again she's goin to get the cops involved. Tell me what you think....
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female
reader, Smitty babyy +, writes (1 December 2009):
Smitty babyy is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank youu so much everyone for helping me. && u all did help :))
A
female
reader, Araelia V  +, writes (1 December 2009):
 If the grandmother wants to be picky then all you need to do is write a note (both of you) or a letter individually signed that states you are happy to have sex with the other person because then if the g.mother tries to force the boyfriend into saying that he was raped then you can produce that to show he was willing to have sexual intercourse with you.
Hope i helped
Araelia V
x
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 December 2009): Surely if you've been caught more than once that would tell you something? Its not the fact that your having sex, its the fact that she keeps seeing her grandson and his girlfriend having sex under her roof. To be honest im surprised she even let you back into HER hourse.
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A
female
reader, baybay +, writes (1 December 2009):
 be more sneaky and try not to do it in their house!but your 17 isnt 18 the legal age?and trust me she wouldnt dare to call the cops on her own grandson! he would be the one to get introuble not you cause hes the older one so he would be the technical rapist.
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A
female
reader, hijacked_dignity +, writes (30 November 2009):
 She is probably saying something to make you think about what you're doing. I mean this house is hers. She should have a right to tell you to stop having sex in her house, and you should be responsible enough and respectful enough to not do it. If you are really of age for your state, then it's not rape.
So what do I think?
Stop having sex at his grandmother's house. It's rude. Especially if they always catch you. She has every right to do whatever she wants if you're doing something she doesn't like in her house, even if that involves calling the cops. So just be ready to handle any consequences your choices bring upon you.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 November 2009): Even if you do consent, it may be considered rape if you have not reached the age of consent, as you may not be able to legally consent in the first place. As already mentioned, you need to do some research on the particular state that you live in. Absent the research, and since you are only two years apart, and over the age of sixteen, it is probably unlikely that he could be found guilty of statutory rape. However, I do urge you to do a quick Google search on the appropriate laws governing your state in this matter.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (30 November 2009):
 Well Hello, have a little respect for your elders.
His grandmother doesnt approve of you having sex at her place. She doesnt like catching you at it.
Why are you and he persisting at having sex at their house when you are being caught out, time after time.
Why cant you find somewhere else to have sex without offending his oldies? Sometimes a little forethought goes a long way
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A
female
reader, pinktopaz +, writes (30 November 2009):
It depends on the state that you live in. If the laws according to your state say that if you're under the age of 18 and having sex with a legal adult, then it is statutory rape.
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A
female
reader, cheesy18  +, writes (30 November 2009):
 Chances are she hasn't been updated on the laws. You shouldn't have to say anything either get your boyfriend to tell her its conceptual and that the legal age is 16 if I'm correct. The grandparents probably think its 18 as that is the age of an adult. and also if the grandparents call the cops their not thinking as it would be their grandson labeled as the rapist.
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A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (30 November 2009):
 If you are consenting, then it cannot be considered rape.
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A
female
reader, Dazed~Confused +, writes (30 November 2009):
 I think maybe his grandmother doesn't approve of you guys having sex, especially in her house. I know my grandmother would have taken a shot gun to me and any guy that she caught me with.
I understand that maybe there aren't any other places where you guys can get together, but maybe try for when the grandparents aren't home or due to come home.
It will show them that you have respect for them and their home, and grandma will probably see the relationship in a better light.
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