A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Okay, here's my problem. Since I met my current partner sex has always been extremely... smelly. When she gets wet, it often, but not always, is accompanied by a strong sour or bad smell. Often it's not too bad (but still definitely worse than anything i've noticed with previous partners), but sometimes as soon as the underwear come off it can be really quite potent. This is a huge turn off - sometimes it can be a really really bad smell - enough to make me wish I was elsewhere/not having sex!I would like to talk to her about it, as i'm aware from googling that infections like Bacterial Vaginosis can cause such odors and are easily treated. However, i'm pretty sure she must also be able to smell it (it's potent!), so I imagine she's been to the doctor and tried to do something about it. My worry is that she's already done everything that can be done, and my telling her that she reeks down there will do nothing but make her self-conscious of it!Should I talk to her about it?
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female
reader, Sweet-thing  +, writes (14 August 2010):
 Maybe she should consider using a douche once a month. And P.S. I've used soap "below the decks" for 30+ years...hasn't hurt me yet and it definately cuts down on the normal smells all women have. Especially if she works out or lives in a hot, sticky climate.
A
female
reader, Black diamond20  +, writes (13 August 2010):
use a condom until she decides to get checked out she probably already know what the prom is chlymedia,gohnerria causes orders to be careful.
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A
female
reader, gizzymylove +, writes (12 August 2010):
 Ok be nice about it and it is probly vaginitous that is the first sign its not a STD but you have to go to the DR over it and the pills work fast my friend had it and it is a very crazy thing to go through
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A
female
reader, bleueyes10 +, writes (11 August 2010):
WOW!!!I have to say this is a big turn off! Should be for you and her. If you smell her fishy smell she does too!She sound's like she does have some kind of infection. YOU HAVE TO TALK TO HER!If you don't someone else will.If the smell is so loud you can smell it when she takes her panties off then that means when she get's up and moves around she is leaving a foul odor. Someone else will do it for you,if you love her don't let that happen.just suggest she a doctor for the odor.
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A
female
reader, Oregongrl1 +, writes (11 August 2010):
Don't count your chix before they hatch! are you a Dr'
does she wear tight pants because sometimes wearing tight pants doesn't allow you to breath and will cause a vaginal infection! seems like it bothers you more then her! are you worried it will never go away and you will have to smell her all the time? why don't you just say something to her you say you love her! i would rather my other half tell me yes it hurts your feelings but it could be something serious too!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2010): There is one very rare condition which cannot be treated easily.. Its known as 'fish odour syndrome' and can be devestating for it sufferers. Its something to do with an abnormality in the body which cannot break down trimethylamine, Which causes a fishy smell..doctors however find it quite hard to diagnose.
Talk to her about it she may just be using the wrong soap, There is a special soap called 'femfresh' which is specifically for that area as it dosent mess with the natural ph of the vagina.
however if she does have an infection such as thrush of BV, she really needs to treat it...maybe shes too embarrased to go to the doctor..talk to her, its not fair on you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2010): this is serious matter.. be a good partner and both of you could look for solution together. sure she might have also seen the doctor and all that, but apparently it is still there.
in my opinion, there might have 2 factors to this problem:
1. personal hygiene - use the specific personal hygiene wash
2. diet - just look it up and discuss it with doctor
please just go have a check up. it will make you feel much better knowing it.
good luck..
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2010): There should not be an odor. An odor indicates something is wrong. I'm sure she is aware of the odor or either she's so used to it, she doesn't. Sometimes diet could also produce an odor. If it is in fact an infection, she should be treated. Definitely use condoms if you aren't. As uncomfortable as it might be, this is something you should talk to her about.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2010): Sweet-thing - using soap down there, and especially scented soap, can actually unbalance the vagina's natural (and healthy/normal) bacteria, and can aggravate conditions such as bacterial vaginosis. It's best not to use soap down there at all.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionMoo's mum - In wellington, so no snow for us luckily!
Re: washing - i'm not sure washing helps that much, once things start heating up and she gets wet, the smell is there.
My main worry is that she's already noticed the smell, been checked out and told everything's healthy/normal and then there'd be nothing for her to do about it but feel bad! Not good!
I've read that some people complain of smelling down below - and there's nothing that can be done.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2010): Your gf has probably become accustom to the odor---which probably explains why she doesn't smell anything. Look, if you have been with her for sometime now and she is a great woman, I don't think this is a reason to up and leave her or cheat. Try to work through it...anything that is worth having is worth fighting for.
You have to talk to your gf about this issue.....sugg. that she goes to a doctor and find out what is going on--she shouldn't object to that. STOP IT WITH ALL THIS IMAGINING THAT YOU ARE DOING. If you haven't asked, if you haven't talked to her about it, then don't assume anything.
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A
female
reader, mzlarryluv  +, writes (10 August 2010):
Women are advised to go through a pap-smear test once every 2 years - this is the test for the virus that leads to cervical cancer but often doctors suggest just doing a full check up for STIs and other infections. I knew a girl who had chlamydia and we could literally smell her vag from across the room, no joke. eeuww.
They WILL pick up any bacterial/fungal infections regardless of testing for STIs. I know a couple of friends who have had similar complaints and have simply taken antibiotics and used special feminine washes to balance the pH level in there.
Try to get her to go get a pap.
I'd just like to commend you on respecting her feelings and caring about her embarrassment.
Good luck.
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A
female
reader, Oregongrl1 +, writes (10 August 2010):
Wow thats a sticky one! you know what i would do? do you 2 like to take showers together! wash her and let her wash you make it romantic! and just use the soap no wash cloth that way you can rinse it off and see if her smell goes away? but don't have sex after you wash her and maybe the next morning try having sex and see if the smell is there? if yea then she has a yeast infection. and it is a touchy thing to approach a woman w/ and im glad that you realize that.
Good Luck!
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A
female
reader, Sweet-thing +, writes (10 August 2010):
Two things come to mind on this topic; personal hygiene (does she bathe frequent enough and does she use soap down there? Some women don't).....If she doesn't bathe regularly, or you're not sure if she uses soap in that area, then offer to bathe with her sometimes, and soap her up everywhere....if she still smells bad, it's definately a bacterial infection of some sort. Try getting her to go see a doctor by saying something like "I had an aunt who was diagnosed with ovarian cancer...do you get checked for stuff like that pretty regularly? Or tell her you heard an ad on women's health issues and remind her it's an important screening test every woman should have a couple of times a year. Anything to get her to go to her physician for a check up. They will discover it (if she actually has an infection) during their check up. Good luck.
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A
female
reader, luvingme21 +, writes (10 August 2010):
 You have no choice but to talk to her. Maybe if you have a close female friend that you tust, you can practice with her and see what see thinks. Your sex partner might think you don't smell her odor and just ignores it. I suggest you do some research on the symptoms she has and talk to her about the research you've done,and let her know that you're just concerned.
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A
female
reader, Moo's Mum +, writes (10 August 2010):
 Hello fellow NZer. Yep this is a tricky one. If she has got a yeast infection then it's probably itchy so you could begin the discussion by asking if she's itchy. You could tell her she looks a bit red and itchy. If you do this in a concerned way I don't think she will take it badly. She definately needs to see a doctor it shouldn't smell! Something is going on there.
Good luck with this.
PS are you in the North or South Island? I'm in the South lots of snow where I live at the mo. Brrrrr
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