A
female
age
41-50,
*db26
writes:I was in a realtionship with an alcholic for nine months. we lived together right from the start. I knew what he was like, but yet i thought like everyone else i could change him. He cheated, lied, stole money from me, and treated me like crap. He left last week when i accused him of cheating again. Turns out in his mind he broke up with me, and then slept with her.
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female
reader, runawayitscory1  +, writes (12 March 2008):
 well obviously hes not a good boyfriend. and may be hard to hear it and maybe harder to admit it. its good that it eneded, because it could of even gotten worse. he could have become very abusive and hurt you bad. a man who steals your money is destine to just break your heart. i know exactly how you feel except in a different way. my dad is also an alcoholic and he steals my moms money and he beats me and her. it kills me to watch her cry at night. so find a guy who will treat u right.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 March 2008): Just be strong and take each day as it comes and be determined not to take him back. Some of us have to go into relationships that are so back, the red flashing lights are there and yet we proceed. We think we can help people and often they need professional help from the start. Dont beat yourself up, i have done just the same in the past. I married a wife beater and i knew he was like that before we got wed. Just be grateful you have got out in one piece. You will meet a lovely bloke in the future who loves you and treats you the way that you deserve. Chin up girl.
take care
xx
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A
female
reader, Jmo +, writes (8 March 2008):
 I don't think I could put it better than Ask oldersister did. You are in a co-dependent relationship and in a way you've been sucked in to an addiction of your own...HIM.
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A
female
reader, duskyrowe  +, writes (8 March 2008):
 Why do you want to put yourself through all the heartache and crap? In my opinion it is time to move on and call complete closure on this "Snake in the grass loser".
Go out and meet people, have fun and take your mind off this guy period. So what if he is slepping with other people? They will soon find out the hard way, that he is nothing but a NO GOOD DRUNKEN NO GOOD CHEATING LYING THIEF. You are well shot of him,he abused your trust and loyalty by using you in the worst possible way. Come on girlfriend find courage and move on from this awful episode of your life. I am surprised you was with this jerk for nine months, (He would not have lasted a nano second with me).
I think you need sometime by yourself before you have a relationship with anyone else, and if you do find Mr Right. Please in the name of God DO NOT move in with him straight away either. The thrill of dating a guy is getting to know each other before you commit yourselves completely and make sure he treats you with the love and respect that you richly deserve. Ok? Take care Hun, Dusky xxx.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (8 March 2008): You already know all the answers. If you take him back you are only going to subject yourself to more pain. If you are having a problem moving on then get professional help. I do not mean to be cruel, you really need help no different than a person who wants to quit smoking. There is nothing wrong with asking or seeking help. The reality is if you want to end the relationship you will and if you don't you won't. Nobody here can affect change other than you.
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A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (8 March 2008):
 You need to understand that you have value yourself, and that you don't have to settle for the bad guys. You don't deserve to be treated that way. Stand your own ground, for your own sake. When you find true love, and I know you will, you will not understand how you could put up with all this.
See it as a new beginning. Now you're free to find someone who will love you.
Take care, poster.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (8 March 2008):
 Choose who you want to have a relationship wisely or you will get plenty of heartaches and headaches.
Wishing you all the best.
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A
female
reader, Entirely Unique +, writes (8 March 2008):
 In his mind or not he hadn't broke up with you therefore whatever way he want's to look at this he still cheated on you.
He needs help with his alcohol problems as that is probably why he's stealing and until he gets that help I really don't think you should fight for this man or relationship because he needs the help first.
While (if) he gets the help you need to do some real thinking and work out if you can forgive what hes done because sometimes the pain of them cheating and lying is more painful than the walking away.
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