A
female
age
26-29,
*arrelracinwrestler
writes:Ok im not sure where to start..all im going to say is i have no idea what the hell im doing. and im 15 that would make sense for that reason huh. Anyways awhile back in Feburary this year i met this guy(22yrs old) online, yeah i know, anyways we had phone sex the first night.then we talked and started texting each other. So he asked me "so what are we?" I just thought to myself why would you ask me that when there really wasnt anything to begin with...but instead of that i said we can keep talking and see where things go and so we did. We were "together" about 7 to 8 months, around late July i found out he was cheating on me even though we said we'd tell each other, coward..doesnt have the sense god promised a goose.. I asked him about the girl and he denied it, like they usually do, until i showed him something letting him know that i knew...I expected it to happen unfortunately but it hurt... Recently we've started talking again. As we've talked he said that he missed me and what not, he's admitted that he f^^^^d up. Pretty much i dont know why im still talking to him at all.... and really dont know what im doing....To be honest i have isusses with my father and really dont feel like he loves me at all. He's an a^^h^^e im not just saying that cause of whats going on, if you lived with me and saw how he acted and knew what i know you'd agree. So..im guessing im looking for someone to fill that void.Also, im lonely...its hard to find someone that isn't shallow and isn't dumber than a box of rocks and will appreciate you for who you are. I already have thing squared away(stable" for a teenager) least for right now academically speaking, just want someone to spend time with and talk to. It makes me sad and hurt knowing i wont find anyone but appreanetly to life thats asking a bit too much....What is a 15 yr old to do.....
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cheated on me, phone sex, text Reply to this Question
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female
reader, barrelracinwrestler +, writes (17 November 2011):
barrelracinwrestler is verified as being by the original poster of the questionSorry I havnt been on in a long time but I'd like to say thank you to those who have helped me. I really appreciate it, I really do. Now I've gond someone that's around my age and he makes me happy and feel cared for. Thank you everybody
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 September 2011): only advice. go slow sister..you are too young to be wasting your child hood on to all these. get rid of every one and enjoy.
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A
male
reader, CASA DE FIGUEROA +, writes (5 September 2011):
He asked you that because you and him never really talked about what youguys are. And just a tip of advide, you should date guys your own age, older guys are more experienced and usally want more because they are not 15 anymore. And about your dad, just stay calm and chill because maybe hes hurtting inside and putting you down is and expression to get it out for him.
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A
female
reader, angelDlite  +, writes (5 September 2011):
 you will find someone don't worry. the guy you met is just a WRONG ONE - any 22 year old guy who has phone sex first night with an under-age girl is definitely not a good guy so let him go. you have just had the misfortune of meeting this idiot but its not all bad news, it will have taught you a life lesson i hope - if a guy acts like a horn dog from the start then there is a very good chance he will cheat, he showed you no respect by talking to you that way in the first call, it someone is interested in having a relationship with you they will be on their very BEST behaviour at the start, they will want to impress you. its obvious this guy didn't care about impressing you coz he knew it was never gonna be anything serious. he probably just saw you as a bit of a plaything coz you're so much younger than him.
i've been with older guys in the past and it seems like they think they're smarter than us coz they're more experienced with life and stuff. try dating a fifteen year old boy next time, i think they would respect you more coz they would see you as an equal. but don't forget - if there is bad behaviour from them at the start, it is likely to never improve.
you say that you have had issues with your dad and you are lonely, i know where you are coming from! you recognise that this is the reason for your craving love from a man, even though you know he is a bit of a dick, you are part way to solving your problem and its great that you are clued up to this at such an early age! it took me YEARS to do this, and lot of heartache in the process! you need to accept the problems you have with dad but know that random guys will not fill that void, so don't put any dependence on them to do so or else you will be desperately clinging onto guys, even the wrong ones who will hurt you
x
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (5 September 2011):
 Sweetheart, I can imagine that at 15 you don't have that much life experience, but saying HE has not got the sense god promised a goose is the pot calling the kettle black.
You hook up on line with a perfect stranger ( caution caution ) He is 22 ! ( and you are underage ! ) You give him your phone no in zero time , and you let him sweettalk you into having phone sex the first night.
Just the fact that he asked you that speaks volumes about the kind of guy he is , but you expect a faithful loyal Prince Charming .
Just because he said " what are we ".
Did it ever cross your mind that this is quite possibly what he
does routinely ?... Trolling the net for young gullible girls that can get him off for free without him having to leave his apartment ?
Btw, I still think that this guy is skanky, but technically he did not deceive you, he did not ask you to date or promise you anything, -you told him " let's see how it goes " and he said " OK ". So I don't think you have ground for accusing him of cheating. You just assumed you were " special " for him without any backing evidence.
And , once you got rid of him the first time, you came back for round two. Oh boy oh boy. I'd say you have been lucky. He could have convinced you to send him your naked pics and he could have sold them or posted them all over Internet.
Now, you admit candidly that you get yourself into this kind of pickles because you are starved for attention and validation. Flashnews :most teenagers feel like you , it's what you do with the feeling that varies.
Once you know or imagine what's the problem, - deal with it. In more constructive ways than becoming the masturbatory tools of selfish strangers.
Work on your self esteem, develop short term and long term goals other than romance, and focus on that. Don't think that any man can fill the void you feel from the outside, - expecially until you choose so naive ways of doing it.
But even if you'd find the perfect bf,- no he won't substitute the love and respect that you don't feel for yourself.
Figure out how to become valuable in your own eyes, then men will become a pleasant complement to your life, not life itself.
What's your hurry ? it's not so late :) you are only 15, I imagine that hormones are uncomfortably burning under your tail , but... you can handle it :) and wait for a guy who is less dumb than a box of rocks and is REALLY worth your time .
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (5 September 2011):
 You sound smart for a 15 year old, and not at all confused or uncertain about things. You know what you want. You want someone to spend time with, who's smart and doesn't lie or cheat. I wouldn't call that expecting too much.
This guy doesn't fit what you want. Not to mention he's 7 years older than you and still dumber than you, and dumb enough to have phone sex with you when it's illegal. You do know you're jail bait, ok? If a guy wants to have sex with you, who's older than you and should know better, let that be the first intelligence test, ok? Any 22 year old who wants sex with a 15 year old, be that nude pictures, phone sex, cybering, or real sex, is too dumb and got his head up his a^^.
You know what you want, and you aren't asking for too much either, in fact so far you've only asked for the bare minimum. This guy is a loser and not someone you want, that's out in the open. Keep looking for someone more worthwhile.
You're way too young to be talking about "never" finding anyone. He'll come along. Don't lower your standards, instead set them a bit higher if you ask me.
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