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Guys, do you agree with my strategy to back off? Do you think I made a fool of myself?

Tagged as: Crushes, Flirting, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (8 October 2016) 5 Answers - (Newest, 10 October 2016)
A female United States age 36-40, anonymous writes:

Hello all I've seen this type question before but I told him I had feelings really put myself out there and he said you're very sweet. Ouch!

Now I know the feelings aren't mutual so I've decided to back off and leave him alone.

Is that the right thing to do? I don't want to make a fool of myself by spending time with him anymore it's been 3 months so I think moving on is best.

Do you guys agree?

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A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland +, writes (10 October 2016):

aunt honesty agony auntIf he does not feel the same way about you then yes the kindest thing for yourself would be to back off. No point spending more time with him only to get deeper feelings and end up hurt.

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A male reader, WickedPoet United States +, writes (9 October 2016):

WickedPoet agony auntYour reaction"ouch" suggests an expectation issue. You seemed to have expected something closely resembling your expressions to him. The question of course is why would you have felt that way? We need the context of this conversation. Was there a realistic basis for your expectation?

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (8 October 2016):

Honeypie agony auntIf you feel the :" you're very sweet" is meant in a patronizing or ... "gentle letdown" sort of way, then yes, I'd back away and leave him be.

It's a little hard to "translate" that sentence when we don't know the circumstances.

Were you two dating for 3 months? Or FWB? Or friends?

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A female reader, fishdish United States +, writes (8 October 2016):

fishdish agony auntAre you guys dating or are you friends? What's happened on his end since? It may be that he was taken aback and needs time to process, but if you're not getting any signals that he's warming up to the idea (via contact or increased show of affection) then yeah, I'd move on.

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A female reader, Youcannotbeserious United Kingdom + , writes (8 October 2016):

Youcannotbeserious agony auntI am assuming "sweet" is not a good thing to be in your part of the world?

If it has been 3 months and he has not been in contact, then yes, you need to move on. Not much info in your post so second guessing here.

Or have you been spending time with him but he has not told you he has feelings for you? In which case, remember men are not always good at articulating their feelings. Take note of what he does more than what he says.

A bit more info would have been useful.

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