A
female
age
30-35,
*aitlywaitly93
writes:Alright, here it goes.I am sixteen and have been absolute BEST friends with a boy for three years. We talk about everything; probably more so than a married couple. This past year we have both told each other that we love each other. But we decided dating could ruin our friendship, so we're basically friends with benefits.In two days, we don't have school and he invited me to his house. I really want to have sex with him (as does he) because we trust, love, and respect one another. We have shared our fantasies and things like that, so I know what he'd want; vice versa.My question is what can I expect with it being both our first times? Suggestions for foreplay?Don't worry, I am on birth control to regulate my periods and we WILL be using a condom to protect from any STI / STD's (although neither of us have done it...). I know all about that sort of thing, please just help me with expectations and ideas. Please answer soon!!!!Thank you!
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best friend, condom, foreplay, friend with benefits, period, std Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (10 November 2009): Anyone notice these are strangely similar questions? This one and this one: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/were-both-13-and-want-to-be-friends.html
A
male
reader, generalist  +, writes (10 November 2009):
well...yaa first time it feels like that only....
i will come back on foreplay afterwords but first thing first...
you sound to be deeply in love with this guy....yaa u said you respect each other and are friends since quite a long....thats good essintial,very essintial...
but try and see if he aso thinks about the same.....
it like thinking about the other side as well....
if you really want to have sex and give a damn on what happens after that then fine...go for it...
if its going to hurt you sentimentally then u better hold for a while...
but promise u if u r kinda want to have an experience you are going to rememebr thins for ever...
have a safe and happy sex...
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A
male
reader, Seadansr +, writes (10 November 2009):
My suggestion is to wait. But if u both cant then i suggest to getting a book called the joy of sex. It explains everything from virginity to orgasms to felatio (blow jobs). I and my girlfriend studied this for 2 yrs before we did have sex and it was earth shattering. Also being 16 your body is not ready to experience the full pleasure you would as an adult.
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A
female
reader, happytochat  +, writes (10 November 2009):
You said you both arent dating because you are worried it will ruin your friendship...well I have news for you, sex can ruin your friendship as well, if not even more then just dating.
You sound like you are phsyically prepared for sex (birth control, condoms etc), but what you arent prepared for is the emotional effects of having sex.
You obviously have feelings for your friend, but how will you will after you both have sex and he is free to have sex with any other girl he wants?
I dont mean to sound condesending but I dont think you are mature enough to be having sex. If you arent mature enough to be able to work out how to make a dating relationship work without ruining your friendship then you arent mature enough emotionally to deal with having sex.
You should talk your parents, or some other trusted adult about this before doing so. Dont rush into anything. I think you should atleast put it off for a bit. If it is meant to be then it will happen eventually. No harm in waiting.
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